So I’ve realized that in conversations I’ll use traditional terms for men as general terms for both genders, both singularly and for groups. I always mean it well, but I’ve been thinking that it’s not as inclusive to women/trans people.
For example I would say:
“What’s up guys?” “How’s it going man?” "Good job, my dude!” etc.
Replacing these terms with person, people, etc sounds awkward. Y’all works but sounds very southern US (nowhere near where I am located) so it sounds out of place.
So what are some better options?
Dude.
I’m a dude. He’s a dude, She’s a dude. We’re all dudes.
Trans women sometimes feel uncomfortable when they are called dude, so if you’re aiming for maximum comfort of people, dude is not a great choice.
Well, to make a more serious comment instead of just quoting an old song from an old movie, it’s definitely most important to call people by pronouns that they prefer. That’s the number 1 priority.
That said, I have some trans friends who don’t like gender neutral pronouns in general. One in particular has explained how much she has gone through to be able to identify as a woman, and using “they” instead of “she” makes her feel like she still isn’t a woman.
So the real answer is there’s no one word that will make everyone happy. They best way to do that is to ask people the pronouns they prefer.
I never though about that aspect of it, thanks for sharing that friend’s perspective.
the best take. as with everything, there is no one size fits all solution
Hey !
Yep, especially your mom, she’s probably the best dude
Earthlings is the only valid option
Earthicans
Earthletes.
I prefer humanoids. One can never be too careful…
I’ve started using “hello chums”
lemmies
I like what they use on the Bananas Podcast. “Guys, gals, and non-binary pals.”
Dudes is fine - folks and yall also work. I use yall all the time even though I’m now in Canada and have never lived in the US south.
Guys, I think, is still a bit too gender associated but it’s borderline. Man is often used in a gender neutral manner but it is very easy to misinterpret and a transwoman could reasonably assume you’re trying to troll them.
You’ve also got fella and feller, I think the latter one is more gender neutral than the former.
I’ve found a lot of success using pal for the individual and folk for the group. Such as “Jesse is my pal”, or “Hey folks.”
…oh shit. Palworlds a thing now. Don’t use pal.
Carbon-based life forms
"Gentels and Ladymen“
gamer(s)
Fellow humans
This is how you get a visit from humans at AARO https://www.aaro.mil
“Nanu nanu.”
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Gang
What’s up, cunts
Works best if they’re your friends and also you’re in Australia
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I am pretty sure the “friends” part is optional in australia
I tend to use “folks” for my usual gender-neutral collective pronoun.
I don’t think “dude” is a real issue, is it? Here in Australia, I’ll happily use mate for any gender, and I often hear other genders do the same.
Of course, we also tend to unnecessarily shorten (or lengthen) people’s names here, and those always get used:
- Darren = Daz or Dazza
- Josh = Josho
- Dan = Danno or Danny-boy
- Adam = Ads
- [first name] Thompson = Tommo
- [first name] Johnson - Jonno
Even our Prime Minister, Anthony Albanese, is Albo. You get the idea… ;)
Dude
So I’ve seen this a lot, but I’m Gen-X and dude was always masculine to me. I support use of dude as gender-neutral, but it’s hard for me to do it naturally because my brain is so locked into dude as gendered.
Aerosmith ain’t helping the situation.
(Also - some of the recent comments on that video are annoyingly predictable swipes at current issues. You have been warned.)
Here is an alternative Piped link(s):
Aerosmith ain’t helping the situation.
Piped is a privacy-respecting open-source alternative frontend to YouTube.
I’m open-source; check me out at GitHub.
