So I’ve realized that in conversations I’ll use traditional terms for men as general terms for both genders, both singularly and for groups. I always mean it well, but I’ve been thinking that it’s not as inclusive to women/trans people.
For example I would say:
“What’s up guys?” “How’s it going man?” "Good job, my dude!” etc.
Replacing these terms with person, people, etc sounds awkward. Y’all works but sounds very southern US (nowhere near where I am located) so it sounds out of place.
So what are some better options?
Dude.
I’m a dude. He’s a dude, She’s a dude. We’re all dudes.
Hey !
Trans women sometimes feel uncomfortable when they are called dude, so if you’re aiming for maximum comfort of people, dude is not a great choice.
Well, to make a more serious comment instead of just quoting an old song from an old movie, it’s definitely most important to call people by pronouns that they prefer. That’s the number 1 priority.
That said, I have some trans friends who don’t like gender neutral pronouns in general. One in particular has explained how much she has gone through to be able to identify as a woman, and using “they” instead of “she” makes her feel like she still isn’t a woman.
So the real answer is there’s no one word that will make everyone happy. They best way to do that is to ask people the pronouns they prefer.
I never though about that aspect of it, thanks for sharing that friend’s perspective.
the best take. as with everything, there is no one size fits all solution
Yep, especially your mom, she’s probably the best dude
Earthlings is the only valid option
I prefer humanoids. One can never be too careful…
Earthicans
Earthletes.
I’ve started using “hello chums”
lemmies
I like what they use on the Bananas Podcast. “Guys, gals, and non-binary pals.”
Dudes is fine - folks and yall also work. I use yall all the time even though I’m now in Canada and have never lived in the US south.
Guys, I think, is still a bit too gender associated but it’s borderline. Man is often used in a gender neutral manner but it is very easy to misinterpret and a transwoman could reasonably assume you’re trying to troll them.
You’ve also got fella and feller, I think the latter one is more gender neutral than the former.
I’ve found a lot of success using pal for the individual and folk for the group. Such as “Jesse is my pal”, or “Hey folks.”
…oh shit. Palworlds a thing now. Don’t use pal.
Carbon-based life forms
"Gentels and Ladymen“
gamer(s)
Fellow humans
This is how you get a visit from humans at AARO https://www.aaro.mil
“Nanu nanu.”
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Gang
What’s up, cunts
Works best if they’re your friends and also you’re in Australia
I am pretty sure the “friends” part is optional in australia
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I tend to use “folks” for my usual gender-neutral collective pronoun.
I don’t think “dude” is a real issue, is it? Here in Australia, I’ll happily use mate for any gender, and I often hear other genders do the same.
Of course, we also tend to unnecessarily shorten (or lengthen) people’s names here, and those always get used:
- Darren = Daz or Dazza
- Josh = Josho
- Dan = Danno or Danny-boy
- Adam = Ads
- [first name] Thompson = Tommo
- [first name] Johnson - Jonno
Even our Prime Minister, Anthony Albanese, is Albo. You get the idea… ;)
Dude
So I’ve seen this a lot, but I’m Gen-X and dude was always masculine to me. I support use of dude as gender-neutral, but it’s hard for me to do it naturally because my brain is so locked into dude as gendered.
Aerosmith ain’t helping the situation.
(Also - some of the recent comments on that video are annoyingly predictable swipes at current issues. You have been warned.)
Here is an alternative Piped link(s):
Aerosmith ain’t helping the situation.
Piped is a privacy-respecting open-source alternative frontend to YouTube.
I’m open-source; check me out at GitHub.
