If someone wants to give up dating due to their looks, age or genetics (that includes mental state) that’s a totally valid reason if you ask me. As long as it doesn’t translate to misogyny no one will get hurt. However a lot of people seem to be ticked off by this idea, why?
People who say they take the black pill haven’t actually taken it yet
I’ve only heard it used by and applied to incels who are only trying to twist the narrative of why they can’t get laid. They aren’t choosing to not date, they are just lying to themselves that they have chosen to be alone, when in reality they are just undateable asshats.
Aromantic and asexual people don’t need to delude themselves into why they don’t date. They might go the other way, tho, due to social pressure to be “normal.” (IE deluding themselves that they NEED to date)
I think this is it. The difference between having a ‘type’ (normal) and being ‘black-pilled’ (weird) is the misogyny.
TIL all aromantic (aro) persons are misogynists (but not misandrists) by reading the comments.
Which comment is saying that? Everyone is being pretty explicit about the differences between choosing not to date because you’re uninterested versus because you think you’re too ugly.
That is very obviously not what anyone is saying. Not dating because you are not interested in dating is different than not dating because you’re down on yourself and blame the world (and those of the gender you find attractive) for creating your situation.
That is very obviously not what anyone is saying. Not dating because you are not interested in dating is different than not dating because you’re down on yourself and blame the world (and those of the gender you find attractive) for creating your situation.
Yes it is. People who are not into dating for that reason (aro) are explicitly being called incels by you in your reply to me. Anyone who isn’t dating without being aro is an incel. You’re a bigot.
You’re the kind of person who would be calling a guy gay (but using the really derogatory terms, fag … ) because he doesn’t have a girlfriend in the last century.
I’m old and feel sorry for people who just want to be left alone for their own reasons. Why is this so called liberal - which in my mind means live and let live - baying-mob so much more vindictive and nasty than I could have ever imagined (rhetoric question).
To be clear, that list (aro and “black-pilled”) was not all-inclusive. There are plenty of people who just don’t want to date, for whatever positive reason (e.g. too busy, focusing on other things, not feeling like making the effort) or even some with negative reasons (e.g. not feeling like they are in good working order mentally, just got out of a relationship and want to spend some time on their own, trauma) that aren’t aro or “black-pilled.” THIS LIST IS ALSO NOT ALL-INCLUSIVE.
Also:
You’re a bigot.
Just… don’t. Stop throwing the word around so spuriously, or it could lose its meaning. It’s an important word, and using it like that leads to the kind of linguistic drift that takes the meaning out of the language.
I’m not interested in pills, black or otherwise. Single ‘l’ - as in beer - maybe! Haha
Live and let live. If individuals are obviously not leading a compassionate life then keep away, but mass labelling an entire set of individuals that you do not know as incels - noting the hateful meaning of that word - is the very definition of bigotry.
I though we’d got rid of labelling people for their dating preferences when being lesbian, gay or bi stopped being particularly note-worthy in the glam-rock era. It’s a shame that you’re still behaving like those knuckle draggers of the 1970s with a different target.
You have given two options: aro or incel. There is an enormous third option which is unavailable to anyone but you, I guess.
Apparently I’m not allowed to use the word ‘bigot’ for a bigot. You don’t define my language use.
It does not sound like a happy bunch to hang around. Is that what you aspire to have as a part of your identity?
Is that what you aspire to have as a part of your identity?
Well it makes no difference whether you do or don’t. That’s the point of taking the black pill.
Can I just dislike anyone that uses colored pill references.
The polite phrasing is pills of color
Well technically ‘black’ isn’t a colour…
Dunno how old you are, but this is how children reply to this kind of thing. Just an fyi
Yes because you’ve take the pill pill
From my understanding, the “black pill community” is highly misogynistic and promotes self harm and mass violence / terrorism. I don’t think anyone would care if it was just a bunch of guys deciding they didn’t wanna date.
There’s no ideology described as being “pilled” that’s anything but toxic.
I’ve never heard that term. I get that some people choose not to date, but don’t most people just live- go to work, grocery, social events, etc.- and talk to the people around them? I don’t really see someone saying, “hey, if that nice girl talks to me I’m going to ignore her.”
Once you have been around enough rejections you will know it’s better not to feed those emotions.
I wholeheartedly agree.
There are better emotions to feed, and they don’t tend to result in rejection.
“Black pill” is a different thing from not dating.
I never dated, just spent time with people who shared my interests. Eventually, I and one of the people who I shared interests with realized that we were often doing so exclusive of other people.
We essentially went from just living our lives to everyone seeing us as a couple, eventually us included.
Pursuing dating for the emotional high will let you down every time. Being real about who you are and what drives you, and learning to have healthy give and take relationships that don’t involve unrealistic expectations means you’ll end up with a more fulfilling life.
Huh? I’ve literally never once heard anyone criticize people who choose to be single or asexual. What are you talking about? You gotta go outside and touch grass man. Get off the Internet for a while.
there’s a TON of hate/distrust for asexual people. “you are just ugly” “you just haven’t met the right person” “why are you celebrating that you don’t have sex? that’s weird” etc.
there’s a TON of hate/distrust for asexual people. “you are just ugly” “you just haven’t met the right person” “why are you celebrating that you don’t have sex? that’s weird” etc.
What kind of conversations are you having with people that would respond like this where they’re learning about how much sex or not-sex you’re having?
literally any Instagram post about asexuality
If you’re posting on the internet in a broadcast form (just as Instagram) about deeply intimate details of your life, you should not generally expect heartfelt nuanced discussion. You’re going to get short attention span pithy responses (as your example shows) or harsh reactionary responses from fringe minority positions (also as your example shows).
Those are internet responses. Those are not representative of real life. This is what the prior poster was telling you.
I’ve heard these in real life too, I just can’t show proof of that
Can I ask if you receive these opinions if it is after you share your positive views on “black pilling”?
Get off the Internet for a while.
You first.
It’s about the reason for choosing to be single. When you talk about how you won’t date anymore because of your looks, people will take exception to that.
Yeah… Because that’s not healthy at all.
It can be healthy if it helps you get in shape.
If the only reason you get healthy is for someone else I would argue that’s still not healthy
Yo are you here for answers or just to debate everyone and be all confrontational?
I think you know the answer to that.
Stopping dating because of looks sounds misogynistic. It implies all women are superficial, which is simply not true. I know several cases of men that could be seen as ugly for different reasons, who had no problem to find a partner thanks to their personality.
Well personally I think all people are secretly superficial in that regard. Both men and women, whether they’re aware or not.
That’s the problem, people are very diverse. Look around yourself for examples of couples (in real-life, not online), and I’m sure you’ll find many examples of “ugly” people of all genders being in happy relationships. I know a guy with a facial deformation in relationship with a beautiful woman, I know a seriously fat couple. The forever single people I know mostly have severe mental or personality issues.
That’s because that’s how you see the world. It’s hard for you to comprehend someone else not thinking the same way you do.
I wasn’t familiar with the term: https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Incel#“Blackpill”
It doesn’t sound good at all.
Do incels have some core complaints with validity? Yeah, online dating has been designed specifically to make the majority of people using it feel bad. There are genuine problems that men face in society that women don’t and they don’t get support for. However you can’t pick and choose the members of your ideology, only your choice to share it with them
The ultimate problem is that red/blue/black pill ideology is all rooted in the manosphere and incel culture. By utilizing their terminology you are associating yourself with a group of misogynists, racists, and terrorists
Which is to say someone who says “my MS makes my life difficult enough as is, so I choose not to struggle with dating on top of it” is different from “I’ve been blackpilled because these Stacys won’t consider dating below 8.5/10s”
There’re other points to be made with regards to being “too ugly to date”, why people dislike non-traditional sexualities, and modern dating culture. However, I’d bet if you went into the real world and talked to real people about specific struggles leading to deciding to no longer date without a bunch of internet words you would see a lot more support
The term black pill, first popularized in the 2010s on the incel blog Omega Virgin Revolt, refers to accepting the futility of fighting against a feminist system. Blackpilled incels are encouraged to either commit suicide or “go ER”/be a “hERo,” referencing Elliot Rodger’s 2014 Isla Vista murder spree that has been called an act of misogynistic terrorism.
(Source: Britannica)
So as I said, as long as it doesn’t translate to misogyny it won’t hurt anyone.
the futility of fighting against a feminist system
Is a bullshit premise that’s not based in reality. This isn’t a “feminist system.”
Also, “won’t hurt anyone” yet calls for them to commit suicide within 3 sentences.
Did you miss the second sentence or… ?
To be frank what youre suggesting is only taking certain elements from the ideology but not some of the largest core concepts. So there’s nothing wrong with that in concept but at that point it’s a different ideology and as such you’d no longer be “blackpilled”
The OP in another timeline: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=IYITxGniww4
I want to set aside my skepticism that this philosophy can be separated from misogyny.
Even if it could, it hurts the practitioner. This is a philosophy of nihilistic abandon and self-harm. If someone has adopted a radical belief in their own hopelessness and worthlessness, and the associated beliefs that life for them can hold nothing but suffering, that person is in crisis and needs help. There isn’t a healthy version of that, and we should consider those people at great risk and in need of assistance.
It does hurt someone. It hurts the person who is adopting these views.
The term is connected to misogyny. If someone just wants to give up dating and that’s the end of it, there’s no reason for anyone to be ticked off by that idea. It’s the doomer attitude surrounding it and the effects of it that cause problems. You used the term ‘black pill’, which has specific connotations - it’s not simply choosing to give up dating.
I don’t know… but what that previous comment describes, sounds to me as if misogyny is the core concept
