So, I’m gay and this is my first relationship. Just recently started having sex. I’ve never had any interest in the penetrating side of things. I’m on the “passive” side. I have no idea what the average is, but my bf can only go for up to 10 mins tops. It seems short to me. Maybe it’s cause I have no previous experience and all I know is from online stuff. Sorry if it’s a dumb question. I don’t know if I should mark this as NSFW or not.

  • Free_Opinions@feddit.uk
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    3 days ago

    For me, having sex is synonymous with trying not to cum. That’s literally the only thing I’m focusing on which is also one of the reasons I don’t enjoy it.

    • Kit@lemmy.blahaj.zone
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      3 days ago

      My ex was like that and our sex life got 10x better when I told him to stop doing that. It became 5-10 minutes of powerful intimacy that was a million times more satisfying to me, versus 30 min of just-ok dicking. He said he enjoyed it a lot more too.

      • Free_Opinions@feddit.uk
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        3 days ago

        Not for all men ofcourse. It’s more of a mental thing I believe. You can just as well overthink yourself into not being able to cum or maintain an erection.

      • superkret@feddit.org
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        3 days ago

        I’m not gay, but I usually don’t last longer than a few minutes when I’m penetrating.
        Made sex suck for a long time, until I realized I’m doing it wrong.
        Now, instead of stressing out about how long I last, I just make sure my partner is satisfied before I even enter.