E: Da Rules
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The teleportation can only be used to move you.
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Your clothes and basic personal items (the things you take with you everytime you leave the house) will teleport with you, but nothing else.
Cuba, for medical and/or dental care I can’t afford in the US
Just a FYI Cuba currently collapsing under the weight of 80 of sanctions. That have finally caught up with it.
Mexico or India ( best) would be your best bet
Can you afford to fly back?
Oh yeah, that’s the cheap part when compared to medical care
🥲
to an alternate universe where magic is real and big titty anime girls want to form a party with me.
I chose this dude’s spawnpoint
onii chan!
notice me senpai!!!
You have been noticed, and found wanting.
OP’s mom? Classic choice
I also chose this guy’s wife.
So, you want to be an isekai protagonist. Understandable, me too!
Wait, I’ll help you with that. Just let me get the keys for the truck.
To the fridge. For a beer.
telefrag.
Select target
Peter Thiel
Based
Can’t I get a return trip? It’s going to be annoying to get a train or plane to take me home.
I teleport to friends house, to show her, that world isn’t like we used to think.
This is such an enigmatic response… like something I’d hear in an A24 film
“teleport” - How exactly? am I unassembled and reassembled? Or does my body just move there? At light speed? NO THANKS.
What does teleport mean to you? Exactly a me-sized number of atoms shifts places with me? So I won’t burst into flames and leave an explosion where I was?
I end up teleported exactly where I intend to be? Without sight? Without knowledge of that location? In the exact space and time I disappear?
Nah nah nah nah absolutely fucking not. no
I’d teleport to a parallel universe that has become an utopia full of futuristic medical solutions.
granted. but everybody speaks erbferb atinlerb
So, Sweden?
People have managed to learn languages odd nothing but signs and gestures…
Visit my friend as easy return from japan seem unlikely with one way teleport.
“Mars!”
Freezes and suffocates
On top of the mars robot ofc!
Better yet, I’m buying an oxygen mask and several layers of winter clothes and going to Titan. Can probably walk around for a few minutes before freezing to death!
But then you’d get to be the first human on Mars. No one could ever take that from you.
Also the first person to die on Mars! :D
Ummm, I have seen the documentary „For all mankind“ on Apple TV and I‘m pretty sure that multiple people died on mars already.
Into the studio of some live tv programme, so it’s caught on camera by a neutral party. Without teleportation to get back, there are no really cool or useful places I want to go to in the next 24 hours. So I might as well try to make some cash out of interviews and stuff.
Smart.
I send Elon Musk to Mars.
That’s 2 teleportations:(
I’m not bringing him back and I’m sure as shit not going with him…
Rule 1
Telefrag Elon Musk, then. His exact position. Assuming this turns him into a fine red mist and we don’t just have the real-world version of “clipping errors” whereby we are both annihilated or merged in some horrible way.
I think the latter would work too.
For you, maybe, not for me.
:3
Lol this is the first time i thought of telefragging outside of a game and the rare time outside of Unreal Tournament
Well that wasn’t there when I posted. Who’s coming up with these rules to save Phoney Stark?
OP I would presume.
You’re right that would rule.
I’d say a collapsing star would be a better option
The Martians deserve him
The sun.
Teleport to my road trip destination. My wife can handle the last two hours herself. I’m too risk adverse to carry out a heist or something and that would really mess up our vacation. I’ll just go ahead and get the hotel room ready and take a shower.
To a place where there are plenty of crumbs.
How did that lawsuit between you and American cartoonist Robert Crumb turn out?
He has bequeathed his fortune to me under extreme duress.
What… what do you do with the crumbs?
Probably grabs them, like the dirty little crumbgrabber he is.