im so sick of seeing reports regarding men posting in women-only communities and i cant help but get annoyed with these guys.
the rules are clearly presented. either youre not paying attention or youre just an asshole who purposefully throws their opinion in a place explicitly not wanting it.
what the fuck is wrong with you guys?
Mod notice: semi-controversial but serious question has been raised about an actual issue. Keep it civil and stay classy.
If you can’t say something nice, don’t say anything at all. Or at least be tastefully funny about it.
Thanks for providing a great reason to leave this community.
The OP has been hostile in the comments, and in their OP, violating Rule 1, and Rule 5.
Do better.
Thanks for providing a great reason to leave this community.
It’s not an airport. You don’t need to announce your departure.
Also, I’ve always been a bit skeptical when someone decides to leave a community because they don’t like a post and/or poster. As if they represent the totality of the sub.
It’s not an airport. You don’t need to announce your departure.
I know.
I did it because I wanted to share my point of view, like you have done here. Both of which are admittedly pointless and time wasting endeavors.
Also, I’ve always been a bit skeptical when someone decides to leave a community because they don’t like a post and/or poster. As if they represent the totality of the sub.
It is not about the post or poster, it is about the lack of action from mods in regards to the post or poster. Which is a constant problem in this community that I have noticed, and a good reason to leave it.
I find it funny that you care so much, so thank you for that.
OK, I pulled out a computer for you so I could see the rules side by side with my post because my mobile client doesn’t allow it.
Rule 1: Be nice and; have fun
Doxxing, trolling, sealioning, racism, and toxicity are not welcomed in AskLemmy. Remember what your mother said: if you can’t say something nice, don’t say anything at all. In addition, the site-wide Lemmy.world terms of service also apply here.
OP came in swinging hot, maybe a little toxic, but there are valid points behind the hot words.
However, OP has shown that they are able to accept other viewpoints from valid arguments (https://lemmy.ca/post/48960508/18080134). So I would argue this is borderline.
I have to say, I have no idea what sealioning is though.
Rule 5: This is not a support community.
It is not a place for ‘how do I?’, type questions. If you have any questions regarding the site itself or would like to report a community, please direct them to Lemmy.world Support or email info@lemmy.world. For other questions check our partnered communities list, or use the search function.
This isn’t a “How do I”. This is an open ended attempt (with some frustration) to try to under why members of the community do certain things.
That’s my view anyway. What’s yours?
Sealioning is when someone pretends to be ‘just asking questions’ in good faith in an attempt to sow discord in a community.
Fuckin’ hate that Kareny lickspittle bullshit. 🤌🏼
This is an open ended attempt (with some frustration) to try to under why members of the community do certain things.
I am fine with not commenting in women-only spaces, but that is very much not what OP is trying to do. OP is venting and using a rhetorical question they don’t seem to particularly want an answer to. Is that “requesting support?” Does that extend to emotional/moral support?
I think if the OP is complaining about not following the rules and spirit of a community when posting, it seems appropriate to point out if they are violating the rules (and spirit) of the community they post it in.
I shared my view and left the community. Was something about my comment unclear?
I didn’t see why it was a clear violation of rule 5. I was wondering why you thought it was
“Cite sources of your claim, prove it, and spend ages providing material that I will dismiss as irrelevant!”.
The name comes from this comic:
Sparrohawcs explanation is also a pretty good one.
That’s a bit of an overreaction.
Why the hell SOME women can’t stop generalizing men’s behaviour?
What the fuck is wrong with you, guys?
irrelevant. its none of your business what they converse amongst themselves
If the community is private you might have a point, but there are very public women’s only communities on this platform who’s conversations show up in the aggregate feeds–that’s not just “conversing amongst themselves.”
are you one of the people doing this or should you have just stfu to start with as you have no actual information to contribute?
I kinda feel like you are intentionally missing the point of the feedback you are getting and pretending like any pushback you get is related to your one specific grievance despite people being pretty clear about what they are saying.
I’m not standing up for Lembot’s motivations, I don’t know Lembot. But their comment on its own was pointing to a perception of your “What the fuck is wrong with you” remark generalizing intrusive behavior to all men, rather than just the intrusive men.
The recent tea app debacle shows you are quite wrong about that.
This I disagree with, as it’s an open community.
It’s read only to men.
I worry about what incels write about women in incel forums. It can lead to horrible behavior outside those forums.
Honestly the varied mobile platforms don’t always present the channel/groups rules in advance. Especially if one is just browsing trending topics. There can potentially be no way for some users to be informed enough before they see a topic they want to interact with.
Best solution I found for similar issue is polite advisement of the rules via dm or other preferred method and helping them learn and have better internet etiquette.
Calling folks out publicly can get alot of negative associations with it as well which might end with you group on the wrong end of a troll.
It’s very often right in the title, AND the description, yet filled with men’s comments.
Nope. To be clear, the rules are not in the titles of most posts or the community name.
Yup, this is it for me. I blocked womenstuff, mostly so that they wouldn’t have to deal with me stumbling in from sorting all by new.
valid points!
For the same reason why women can’t stay out of male-only spaces. Women have been demonizing male-only spaces for decades. If male-only spaces are bad, female-only spaces are bad… I see no other ‘equal law for all genders’ reasonable outcome
How do you know they’re guys? Who decides who’s a woman?
They’ve got a super secret proprietary Testoste-meter®, of course!
Totally different from the Teste-tester® and similar knock-offs. Theirs is legit, 100% and totally bonerfide.
they tend to self identify in various, context specific ways. language is powerful
How do you know they’re not women trolling as men?
You’re reaching.
TIL there is women only spaces on the internet. How do you even enforce it?
most of these guys are self identifying…
With difficulty, as demonstrated here.
Mandatory penis inspection, obviously.
I seriously hope you mean this as a joke.
Not for much longer at this rate, submit ID for verification
They use the UK way, where you film your private parts and then they can decide where you fit in.
Please present yourself to JK Rowling’s TERF Inspection Booth /s
Knowing that he loved coke and alcohol at this time makes this hairstyle make sense.
Ask the UK government
You hope that men will recognize that this is a space not meant for them (which is often explicitly stated in the post body) and respectfully not comment. And those men that do comment but are respectful get politely asked not to comment again. And those men that comment and are rude or disrespectful get banned.
And some men do fly under the radar but a surprising number feel the need to start their comment with “As a man…”.
Say I’m a trans female. Can I post then? Trans man? Gay man? Gay woman?
It’s self policing. If they’re being obnoxious or killing the environment or culture of the space, downvote/block/report and move on.
the rules are obvious, and trans inclusive.
if it wasnt for the sheer volume of [presumed] idiots who cant seem to follow those rules i wouldnt have posted. the points is the reports and heavy moderation required.
its like digital mansplaining
So you decide to ragepost in a different community that had nothing to do with it? This community is for asking questions, and it’s pretty clear you’re just phrasing things as a question so you can rage and troll without getting the boot
“Why the hell can’t blacks stay out of white only spaces”
This is a false equivalency, my dude. There are definitely good reasons for people who generally face systemic discrimination (ie. Women, black people) to have separate communities from those they face discrimination from (men, white people). It’s not like they are trying to divorce themselves from society at large.
Why not have a community of people that are against this discrimination, rather than just having the targets of it? I feel like it doesn’t really help…
And anyways, pleading your cause publicly will always be better imo. Better to avoid confirmation bias and other bs
this says more about you than the original topic
Don’t like what you see in the mirror?
I know you edited your post, which still has things I think are wrong, but OP is absolutely correct based on your initial post… JS
My edit was only adding the 2nd paragraph. And no, it is not wrong and the OP is not correct
A few points:
-
It could be a mistake, but adding context without labeling it as an addition or an edit changes the view of the discourse that has already been made
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You once again flipped the discriminatory group and the group discriminatory against which is at best a misunderstanding and at worse malicious
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You are STILL wrong and are mansplaining. You don’t need to insert yourself into women’s discourse. You are literally the type of person women’s only spaces are built to protect against. While yes, help from those who are not discriminated against definitely help the discriminated, that help comes in listening to what they have to say and support. Your expressed viewpoint is more or less: “I am very important and you should hear what I have to say because it is helpful”. You are, intentionally or not, giving subtle hints that you are better than women and that’s why you should be allowed to force your way into their discourse. In this day and age, we call that sexism.
Maybe that’s not your intention, but boy your writing is full of red flags
giving subtle hints that you are better than women
Go ahead and point out these “subtle hints” that I’m better than women.
In this day and age, we call that sexism.
Yeah, that’s not what sexism means.
You said in your edit: Men are relevant and important to addressing women’s issues.
That’s it.
And per merriam webster:
prejudice or discrimination based on sex Source: https://www.merriam-webster.com/dictionary/sexism
Your statement in and itself, shows prejudice based on sex.
-
purple!
not sure how tossing irrelevant info matter, but there ya go!
the rules are clearly presented. either youre not paying attention or youre just an asshole who purposefully throws their opinion in a place explicitly not wanting it.
what the fuck is wrong with you guys?
The same as with those women wanting to get in this men space? I wonder…
More seriously, you ask a legit question (as it would be legit if it was a man asking why some women so badly want to join in men-only spaces), a question that could trigger an interesting discussion, but why does it have to be so fucking angry? (See how poorly it passes?)
the rules are clearly presented
I use Voyager. Community rules are hidden unless you specifically go to that community page, open the menu, and select “sidebar”. It’s incredibly easy to miss.
If a community only wants some people posting then a quick fix it to not allow just anyone to post to it.
I think generally if somebody does this genuinely they are politely told the rules but then some feel hard done by and start whining about it.
People in general want to be included and some even more so when they’re told they’re not allowed in.
It’s easy when it’s a physical space, ropes and security keep the riff raff out. With online spaces, it requires active moderation, mods who are willing to enforce the rules and ban those that violate them.
“somegroup”-only communities really feels like discrimination to me
Something about a women only space triggers people. Just look at the people replying here. They can’t seem to help themselves.
Something about a “group” only space will trigger me regardless.
Do you have examples of women only communities? Because I have probably inadvertently done so. Admittedly, I probably also haven’t read the rules as my mobile client makes that stuff kind of hidden.
I love the posts that come out witchesvspatriachy for example. That’s definitely female dominated, but I didn’t read the rules because, well, they didn’t show up in the all feed, so I don’t know if I shouldn’t post.
I also think it’s good to get some outside opinion, occasionally, but female spaces need to remain female dominated for good reason.
/me shrugs. Sorry if I’ve been the point of your annoyance
