I don’t understand why people leave their sex toys in the shower. One time when I was a teenager I was masturbating in the shower and accidentally got cum on my sister’s dildo. I had to scrub that thing with all the soaps, bleach, toilet cleaner and just everything soap related I could get without anyone finding out. I guess I got lucky because no one ever found out and she didn’t mysteriously get pregnant afterwards.
There’s a myth that carrots are good for your eyesight, but what’s interesting is that carrots are actually really good for your memory. I lost one up my ass when I was 12 and never forgot that moment.
I think in the future, you should use the version with “my uncle stuck one up my ass when I was 12 and never forgot about it.”
It’s a better punchline imo.
What about being sexual abused by a older family member makes it a better punchline?
Oh no, you forgot you carrot in there
That doesn’t answer anyone’s question.
Black humor is an important coping mechanism
This is remarkably common among visitors to A&E.
Have you seen the price of dildos? I can’t blame people for getting creative with household objects!
Accident and emergency people?
I think it is accident and emergency wards
Now the sentence makes more sense …
That aquaglide tells me someone was trying to get their 5 (inches) a day. Stay healthy bitches!!
It might go well in a fresh salad or stew.
Never heard of a Shower Orange? Just a veggie version of that I imagine… I’m sure…
Give it a nibble. You might like it.
I’d eat it. I don’t mind leftovers and I hate waste.
it might be that it wasn’t used for eating
I don’t think that’s for eating
No one does, judging by the look of that one. 🤫
Nobody.
There are no bites in that carrot. I’d avoid touching it
Could have just been washing it for later consumption. Best to see if it’s still warm.
Smell it … if you dare.
Why stop there?
IDK man… in my experience vegan balloon-knot and carrots 🥕 🐖🦩🎟️🤙
I’m just guessing on the vegan part obviously…
College is tough, sometimes you just forget your carrot in the shower. —Sigmund Fraud
