Some random dude walked up to me while I was waiting outside a food place for my food and asked me this question.
I said “no, I dont give out random favors” and something along the lines of that’s sus.
Is it rude to say no to random dude that asks for a favor?
Not gonna lie, I was here to call you an asshole for not even hearing out the request, then I read it was a random dude on the street. Nah, refusing to engage with strangers on the street in any capacity is not rude and, depending on where you live, it may be a smart thing to do.
He was probably going to ask you to take a photo or something. It’s fine to say no, but kind of rude to refuse to hear the request.
You do not owe any random person anything.
(yes really. It may be rude on occasion but you do not owe politeness to just anyone either. And oftentimes politeness is also abused)
“You can ask.”
my usual answer when I’m suspecting some kind of boundary-pushing behavior is “well you can ask…” …but I have to hear out my psych patients, you don’t owe strangers the same obligation.
Well, yes, I would say it’s rude if you have no reason to say no. At least hear them out is usually considered nice.
But…
If the person is clearly wanting to sell something to me, or trick me into something, or take advantage of me (typical in touristic places) I would just say “no thanks” and move on.
‘No.’ is a complete sentence and you do not have to justify yourself in any way. I don’t think that would be considered rude, either.
you are not obligated to speak to a random person in public at all
I think I agree with most of the replies here saying that the way it was handled was rude. If the opening response to me talking to someone was like that, I would feel like, okay, who pissed in your cheerios and I would have walked off.
Like others have said, there’s more to the solution than a yes or no. I personally think “depends on the favor” , is a very appropriate response, or a “maybe what do you want” Or if you’re planning on saying no regardless, do it how you did, without calling the other person creepy, its just extremly rude to assume someone is a creep while also shutting them down before they can actually talk.
Congrats, you just dodged a fae bargain.
I’d say something like “uhhh what’s up?” or “maybe?” and let them ask a specific question since saying yes sort of feels like agreeing to do the favor without knowing what it is first.
As some others have said, no, it’s not rude to decline. Whether or not it’s rude is in how you word it. You were rude in this particular instance.
The question is rude in this context. It’s not rude to completely ignore rude questions.
Your rationalization sounds like some self centered manipulative bullying bullshit.
On the contrary, it’d be rude to expect any other answer. Shoving expectations onto a complete stranger and then judging them for firmly denying you is what’s rude here.
I’d like to advocate that - even if it is rude - it shouldn’t be a problem. What I mean is, if you ask someone you don’t know well for a favour, and you get a rude or borderline aggressive reply, just accept it and walk away. So many of us give weird-sounding answers in the spur of the moment, with no bad intentions. When you hear/receive one of those weird replies, it does no harm to give it the benefit of the doubt.
I don’t disagree, but the question was whether or not it’s rude. So that’s what I stuck to.
“I’m sorry but I really don’t have the bandwidth right now.”
Better question why do u care if its rude? You have every right to be as rude as u want to anyone u damn well please. If they are a stranger on the street who cares.
Because that stranger on the street is a real person and you want them to have a good day too.
You don’t need to stress over if you came across as rude, but being polite is something I, at least, would like to try if I can.
I don’t care if I’m rude to someone who’s trying to scam me, or in this case started being inconsiderate themselves.
Stephen Covey discusses this in Seven Habits of Highly Successful People. He’s asked if it’s OK to lie to someone. He answers by posing a scenario where being honest gets you killed, but using a harmless lie you aren’t.
I highly recommend reading the book.
