• Steak@lemmy.ca
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    7 months ago

    As long as fucking pedos don’t start trying to go into my daughters change room I’m fine. But at my local y there’s this trans dude who is basically just a 35 year old bloke that wears a dress, and he gets to go in the girls change room and change with my daughter. I don’t even get to go in there with her. I have no idea what this dude does when he’s in there with her but she’s to tell me if she ever feels uncomfortable.

    • expr@programming.dev
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      7 months ago

      Trans woman*. You’re misgendering her. And it’s no different than any other woman going into the changing room. Not sure why you’d think otherwise.

      Associating trans people with pedophiles is a very tired refrain that has no basis in reality. It’s just bigotry, pure and simple.

      • Steak@lemmy.ca
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        7 months ago

        You’re insane if you don’t think pedophiles are taking advantage of this. I don’t trust that guy one bit.

        • Dkarma@lemmy.world
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          7 months ago

          Yes we know you’re a transphobe. U said it already. You’re terrified of a guy in a dress.

          Using your daughter as an excuse to display your bigotry… Shame on you.

          • Steak@lemmy.ca
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            7 months ago

            Read my other comment.

            And I’m not “using my daughter” she shares the same feelings I do. And I don’t say anything to this guy or the staff I do respect his rights. But what the hell this is just not a good situation and anyone who doesn’t see that, idk what to say. But it’s weird.

          • Steak@lemmy.ca
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            7 months ago

            Okay just down vote me without replying. Great way to make your point

        • Soulg@sh.itjust.works
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          7 months ago

          Why do you think pedophiles would wait to be allowed into the girls bathroom? Literally nothing was ever stopping them to go in before.

      • Steak@lemmy.ca
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        7 months ago

        Idk how you think I’m wrong for thinking that there’s something messed up about this. My daughter is 12. This man is mid thirties maybe 40. He has spent decades being a man. I think it’s totally unfair that my daughter has to change in the same room as him. It makes her uncomfortable, do her feelings not matter? She has seen his penis once already and told me about it. This has been a thing for months with us. If we know he’s there we make sure he isn’t in the changeroom when my daughter goes in. But sometimes he goes in after she’s already in there and I can’t do anything to stop it. I have never brought this to the attention of the ymca because I understand we’re a progressive society here in Canada and he has rights too. But you can’t say it’s totally insane of me to think that this whole situation is kinda strange. I’m not comfortable with my 12 year old daughter seeing a adult mans penis in a chnageroom sorry. That’s why we have gendered changerooms.

        • AnIndefiniteArticle@sh.itjust.works
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          7 months ago

          Is seeing a grown woman’s penis in a changing room somehow worse than seeing a grown woman’s vagina (likely also a common sight in there)? I don’t see the problem here, bodies are bodies. If everyone is being respectful of boundaries and personal space… what is the issue?

        • AnIndefiniteArticle@sh.itjust.works
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          7 months ago

          Hey, I also want to say that it is perfectly valid and responsible to want to chaperone a 12 year old in your care in a place that they will be disrobing in front of strangers. My deviation in opinion from you is that I don’t think gender or sex are a factor here. In my opinion, ideally you could accompany your daughter into the changing room so long as you don’t cause problems for anyone else there.

          Gender segregation is problematic, wasteful, and unnecessary. It reinforces sexist biases. In my opinion the problem is that you should not be separated from your child in this instance. The discriminatory structure of segregation is separating you from your child and making you feel anxious, and that anxiety is nucleating around a person you have identified as “other”. You should be with your child when preparing to use the services of the Young Man’s Christian Association. It unfortunately has the toxic superstitions and calcified structures of a highly problematic abrahamic society.

          The Abrahamic Patriarchy strikes again. I’m sorry for the discomfort it is causing you. Will you help us overthrow the scourge of monotheism?

    • funkless_eck@sh.itjust.works
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      7 months ago

      man when you hear about the rate of CSA/rape/pedophilia among pastors/priests/nuns/monks, prison guards, cops, judges, correctional facility workers, mental health workers, and politicians you’re gonna flip your wig.

    • DerisionConsulting@lemmy.ca
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      7 months ago

      They are a trans woman (like Laverne Cox), not a trans dude (like Elliot Page).

      If you’re upset that she can go into the changing room because she has a penis, why are you upset that you are not allowed to go into the changing room, since I assume that you have a penis?

      • Steak@lemmy.ca
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        7 months ago

        I’m not sure what you’re trying to say. But I’m not upset that I can’t go into the girls change room.

        • funkless_eck@sh.itjust.works
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          7 months ago

          I was always in the lady’s changing room ages 0-10 when my mother took me swimming. I was in the lady’s bathroom until I was about 7 probably, too. It’s normal for young kids to accompany their parents.

          • Steak@lemmy.ca
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            7 months ago

            I’m merely stating I don’t go in there with her. I didn’t say “I can’t go in there with her, but I want to”. I don’t want to. I want it to be a place for only woman. The rules align with my beliefs.

            • DerisionConsulting@lemmy.ca
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              7 months ago

              The word “get” is linked to desire (“get to go” vs “have to go” vs “allowed to go”) but maybe you didn’t mean it that way.

              The changing room does appear to only be for women currently, which is why the woman you’re upset about is using it.

              If you want the changing room to be divided by genitals, that’s something different.