Summary
DOGE staffers Tyler Hassen and Bryton Shang tried pressuring the Bureau of Reclamation to open a California water pump to aid Los Angeles during January’s wildfires, though the system couldn’t reach the city.
When denied, they flew there to do it themselves but failed due to maintenance and access restrictions.
Critics called DOGE a “slapstick operation of 20-somethings they’re seeing as whiz kids but have zero knowledge.”
Trump later ordered dam releases, flooding farmland. Critics called DOGE’s actions reckless and uninformed.
They’re not even old enough to rent a car. Wtf
Flying across states for a photo op? Taxpayer money well spent—if you’re making satire.
🐱
Reminder: pronounce DOGE as “doggy” to deny them legitimacy
Yes! I always talk about Musk’s Doggy-Department.
Or just DGE like it would be if it were an actual bureau, DOGE is what they want because it minimizes legitimacy of government itself.
Always have been
I’ve been pronouncing it “doogie” because it makes it seem as silly as it is
I like your approach. It certainly makes me think of how all the people involved are like way too young.
I’m going to keep going with “doggy” because it reinforces to me how the decision making is on par with toddler logic
They look like my dad after he finds a new jacket at Costco.
These Doggy stooges are sooooo freaking annoying.
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Anyihing where Trump or Musk are involved there’s incompetence.
Who paid for the flights? American tax dollars or Elon, because it was poorly planned and inefficient which goes against the ideology of DOGE
They should have been arrested.
They should have
been arrestedhad the absolute shit beat out of them.Our boys in blue are fully capable of doing both.
The Sheriff has had to issue a memo in my county because the deputies are openly fantasizing about murdering Musk and his fuck boys. So yeah… Something to look forward to.
If DOGE was a movie, it would be Sausage Party.
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This was all by design. It’s meant to fuck over this year’s harvest and drive food prices up.
You get it.
I would reiterate a point I have made several times that Trump has taken actions a number of times that seem to me to not be a great idea for agriculture. That’s a little surprising, since agriculture is normally a Republican stronghold.
I’m semi convinced this is a setup to justify a Canadian invasion to acquire water in the summer
Can’t fucking wait for real life Water Wars
I wish I had the confidence of a DOGE tech bro even for a week.
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I wish someone would put me in a room with these losers
No shit. Little boys would be crying for their mamas.
it’s not about the water, it’s about OBEYING them. If Trump, his oligarchs or their puppets tell you to jump you jump or ask ‘how high’ but don’t question them and surely don’t disobey them
It is extremely important for people to stand up to Trump. Everyone from European nations to US federal workers to media outlets to members of congress should be opposing Trump’s bullying to the maximum extent.
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No need to grind when they have soft, very-white underbellies.
agree completely. I’ve been thinking a lot lately about why this simple defiance is so difficult for some people. I figure it’s because they fear social consequences (what will people think of me as a rule breaker?!) or they fear economic consequences (I could lose my job and ability to support my family!).
what’s interesting is that the solution to both reasons/excuses is having a strong social support network and solidarity with others who would help you when you stumble. modern individualism and desperation has made people so isolated and fearful of being mis-perceived and has made us less powerful to stand up for what we (collectively) know is the right thing to do.
if someone in my circle gets fired or shamed because they said “No” to a fascist, theyre going to get a lot of help if they need it. and i make sure to tell them that.
desperation has made people so isolated and fearful of being mis-perceived and has made us less powerful to stand up for what we (collectively) know is the right thing to do
Just never forget that this part is by design.
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Lead them to the PA system, it has the most buttons so clearly it’s the most important.
or open athletic engagement
Why did my dumb ass immediately think “what, like challenge them to a triathlon or something?” when I read that
These idiots actually thought the only reason the fires were still burning is because someone hasn’t opened up a faucet yet, and that no one else but them have thought of it.
F*cking idiots.
Fucking idiots.
Fucking dumbasses.
Fucking dipshits.
Fucking fucks.
Fuckity fuck-fuck
Dicking dicks.
Fucking idiots
Fixed it for you
I’m telling mom
Uncensor your fucking shit for the love of fuck
Most of us, raised by Hollywood, imagine critical infrastructure has guards and ID checks. Keys. Guys with machine guns. The last 10 years, it’s pretty clear the major controls are just that no one tries. “I’m from DOGE” is going to be the penetration tester’s go-to social engineering hack for the next four years. Just walk in, press the Big Red Button, and leave.
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“And I’m from SchruteBuckCoin, we are currently outperforming you in multiple metrics.”
This instance shows that it is, in fact, how that works, at least in part:
Shang wasn’t an official federal employee yet, meaning he couldn’t access the pump.
No credentials, no access. Most infrastructure like this has physical security like fencing, padlocks, steel doors, and so on. I don’t know if there’s a break-in alarm, but even if not, they’d still have to figure out how to access the pumps and turn them on. They’re probably computer-controlled, so you’d have to get access to the computer system. I’m sure you could override it on the PLC, or just plain hotwire it, but that takes a whole new set of skills.
“oh no. I’m a princeton grad. I’m rich. I work for Elon and Trump. I have authority over everyone here” kind of mentality.
I’ve got some bad news for you…
If it is locked, the key is usually nearby, and it’s usually the cheapest, least secure, possible lock to buy.
While probably true, morons like these two would be unlikely to get past even those measures.
I would not be the least surprised if the sum total of the “l33t h4x0r skills” of these teenagers boils down to knowing the least bit about whatever the latest Javascript frontend framework is, combined with some LLM to help them with it…this is what happens when a whole lot of idiots think that being young == being tech-savvy.
People hand the tech decisions over to complete morons with no understanding and so much Dunning-Kruger that they not only don’t know shit about something like PLCs, and may not have even heard of them, they’ll be too fucking arrogant to ask people that DO know, because, gosh, they might be OLD (i.e., > 30 years old) or something.
“Move Fast and Break Things” for government translates to…
Move fast to give billionaires gigantic tax cuts and break Social Security, Medicare, and Medicaid.
