Dude imagine getting hit with a groin shot with that fucking thing in your taint
I think I’d be more concerned if my hands were that small
This seems more practical for a temporary birth control for men.
Still under development, but works like a microscopic net to prevent sperm from exiting and can be dissolved later if you do decide to have kids.
An even better birth control is Arch Linux. It’s free and open source. I use Arch btw.
As a fake internet doctor this is all I need to diagnose you as STi free
Wait won’t this turn off their brains? How will they breathe?
After you get snipped, it’s potentially weeks/months before you are shooting blanks, a switch like this is less of babies/no babies and more like babies/accidental babies.
Edit: sorry for facts on shit post
This was my first thought. I could see this being a medical procedure in place of a vasectomy. Get switch (or something less likely to get bumped) installed and set to off. Then when you want to have kids, another procedure to turn the switch on.
People keep looking for a quick fix for male sperm control, I didn’t think it is possible. At least not as a off and on solution that keeps coming up.
Maybe this plus a urethral spermicide enema?
I think you’ll need to go deeper than just the urethra.
Yeah, but you still gotta go through it
I was in a band called Urethral Spermicide Enema. We were the least successful string quartet in the Florida panhandle.
Should’ve gone to Gainesville
Did you have to get a USE to join the band?
Yes here is an article about it. Article
The relevant part. “The binary nature of the Bimek SLV might make it seem that you can switch off your potency at will, but the body will need time to flush existing sperm out of the system, as it were. The ever-helpful FAQ says that it may take up to three months, or “until about your 30th ejaculation.” Whichever comes first is a question only you can answer.”
To clarify why, it’s because sperm travels through those tubes for at least 5 days before reaching maturity and then once in position can be ejaculated by a pressure differential caused by the prostate (that bulb thing between the balls and urethra). So an effective switch with an instant effect would need to be placed before but directly adjacent to the prostate which could have potential complications when the prostate attempts to dry fire with the feed shuttered.
The solution is clearly to add a synthetic pressure bladder. (Don’t, I’m joking).
30th ejaculation? pfft, hold my beer and watch this.
I’ll hold your beer, but I’m not providing an audience.
Screw this guy. I’ll cheer you and bring you water when you’re done
Yeah…you need to be hydrating if you’re fapping several times a day.
That’s just good science.
Yep. For anyone who’s that serious about not having children, that’s more like an incentive.
Source: got snipped.
When I got mine, the doc said I should wait about two weeks then “ejaculate as frequently as possible” before returning for the scheduled checkup/semen test.
Doctor’s orders! 🫡
Lol I was given the same advice.
“Go home, rest up for two weeks, the bust as much as you can before you come back and get tested”
Weirdest gdq speedrun ever?
That’s like half a day. What am I supposed to do with the other half?
Beat your meat in the missus?
Gotta wait for the clear bill of health
This is an idea from a book by john scalzi called starter villain.
click
Before continuing, please accept the following terms and conditions… [35 pages of legalese ensue]
“you’re subscription will expire in 3 days. Renew now to avoid testicular incineration.”
Followed by 15mins of unsinkable ads
uBlock Origin -Iceberg edition-
That’s either a very small finger or a very large dick
For you
I don’t want a kill-switch. I want a turbo-button to slice metal sheets with a jet of cum.
You need a button for that?
If you are experiencing pressure issues just mitigate the issue by adding acids (via special infection cultures in the balls) to the cum, or some abrasive materials (jagged kidney/bladder stones perhaps?).
is this one of them brandnewsentences?
Like others, I don’t have a use for my balls anymore. It sure would be nice to keep them around looking good though. But anyway, could I please just get the euphoria stimulus! I don’t really care for all the gooey mess.
Roses are red, this drink’s made from laudanum…
Remember to flip the switch back on when you need to pee
Not the same plumbing.
Contrary to common belief, pee is, in fact, stored in the balls.
Yeah, TIL about the meme. Whoosh for me.
Congrats! You were one of today’s lucky ten thousand!
TIL. Thanks.
This is the real reason Data doesn’t tell everyone where his off switch is.
I mean if you’re that worried it’d be more effective to build up a spank bank for making kids later and then just get a vasectomy.
I’d just forget which one is on and which one is off. Also I have zero need for the on setting.
wait till this comes with a monthly subscription
When Google wont give you back the API keys to the chastity electrodes