M. 34. Unfortunately I will never get companionship, never being with a woman, so that means no kids, until recently i was doing a miserable job, now I’m unemployed. I don’t have friends and still living with my family since I can’t survive alone, we’re low class…
Seriously, what’s the point? Please don’t tell me to just live and go out there and explore the world, to leave everything behind, that’s not possible. I always despised “exploring” that’s why I stay in my room most of the time, even when I had a job. But I know how some of you will respond…
I guess there’s no point. Someone had to lose this fucking game.
Let me tell you a story about this guy named R. Buckminster Fuller…
About 100 years ago or so, he was bankrupt. No job, no potential for a job, he had a wife and kids he couldn’t provide for, and with a life insurance policy that made him literally worth more dead than alive.
He was standing on the edge of one of Lake Michigan, contemplating throwing himself in so at least his wife could collect the insurance money, when he had this sudden realization…
That maybe, just maybe, the universe had some purpose for him after all, and if he threw himself in, he’d never find out what it was.
So he made a wager with himself, to keep it together long enough to see where this would all go.
"If I take oath never again to work for my own advantaging and to work only for all others for whom my experience-gained knowledge may be of benefit, I may be justified in not throwing myself away. This will, of course, mean that I will not be able to escape the pain and mortification of being an absolute failure in playing the game of life as it has been taught to me.
I sought to use myself as my scientific “guinea pig” in a lifelong experiment designed to discover what — if anything — a healthy young male human of average size, experience, and capability, with an economically dependent wife and child, starting without capital or any kind of wealth, cash savings, credit, or university degree, could effectively do that could not be done be great nations or great private enterprise to lastingly improve the physical protection and support of all human lives.
Friends would say, “You are being treacherous to your wife and child, not going out to earn a living for them. Come over here and we will give you a very good job.” When, persuaded by their obvious generosity and concern, I did yield, everything went wrong; and every time I went “off the deep end” again, working only for everybody without salary, everything went right again."
Did it work? Well, he went on to hold 28 patents, including, notably, the geodesic dome.
“Not only did Bucky and his family survive the experiment, they thrived. Without any kind of public relations or marketing support, he would eventually be mentioned in over 100,000 articles, books, and broadcasts. In his last twenty years of life he circled the globe 47 times and spoke to 30,000 students. He published 24 books and funneled $20 million into prototyping and design of dozens of artifacts, from domes to cars to prefab bathrooms. Though his annual earnings eventually rose to $250,000, he never made a profit; he always spent every dollar on research and development, “always operating in proximity to bankruptcy without going bankrupt.””
Here’s the thing. That guy was fucking smart, I’m not. I barely finished middle school, and HE ALREADY GOT KIDS AND A WIFE…
I’m not even close to that and I can’t even study for a driving lesson. I’m not going to reach any of that, I can’t even live alone dude. I got nothing to offer since I’m nothing special and I don’t have the talent or desire.
Not with that attitude you won’t, no.
If you didn’t finish high school, the first thing you need to do is get your GED.
If you can’t study for a GED or a drivers license, then you might need a medical diagnosis.
Is not an attitude is a reality. Nobody of my family went beyond middle school as well. Nobody drives with either.
Who cares what your family did or didn’t do? This is about you. Your situation has clearly made you miserable, which means it’s on you to do something about it.
Your first step is to get that GED. If you find you’re unable to study, then see about a medical diagnosis, you may have a fully treatable learning disability.
You’re able to read and write coherently which rules out dyslexia, but it could be something else.
Wouldn’t it be worth exploring? What if the one thing holding you back was a stupid biochemical quirk that can be fixed by taking a pill twice a day?
In my case, my liver doesn’t process alcohol correctly, if I drink 1 beer, I’ll projectile vomit for 3 days. :( Bodies do weird shit sometimes.
(Yeah, no pill for me, I just don’t drink.)
I won’t get any studies, I’m dumb and can’t retain info, always sucked at math and others, and it’s a waste of money.
So, again, medical diagnosis. Learning disability.
You’re on the Internet and on Lemmy, that proves you are capable of learning new things.
Nobody likes me
Everybody hates me
Guess I’ll go eat worms
Big, fat, juicy ones
Long, thin, slimey ones
Itsy bitsy, fuzzy wuzzy worms
Down goes the first one
Down goes the second one
Oh, how they wiggle and squirm!
Big, fat, juicy ones
Long, thin, slimey ones
Itsy bitsy, fuzzy wuzzy worms
Up comes the first one
Up comes the second one
Oh, how they wiggle and squirm!
Big, fat, juicy ones
Long, thin, slimey ones
Itsy bitsy, fuzzy wuzzy worms
Nobody likes me
Everybody hates me
Guess I’ll go eat worms!Name checks out.
Don’t post this again until you’ve done something to listen to the people around you.
How about responding the answer instead of working around it
The answer is that you simply need to stop being “someone like you”, and therapy WILL make that happen if you let it.
Thanks for the heads up so I know to block them!
Live a better life, not for other people, live a life you want to lead. When you have your own life sorted, you’ll find other people want to participate more in your life
the biggest doxxer/bully to us in our life is mostly ourselves
Life sucks. But it can change a lot in a year if you try.
From what you are writing, you seem like a good guy. So you got that going for you. You never count your money, when you’re sittin’ at the table. Shortest road to true happiness is; don’t be an asshole. You seem to pass, so keep going and you will get there. Other people can’t make you happy, only you can. I’m rooting for you.
Listen to OP, he isn’t a good guy. Go look at his post history. He does this 1-2x a week. He’s a walking pity party.
Sounds like he needs someone with training to help him through retraining his behavioral/thought patterns, something a functional social system would provide if those were as common as comment culture.
No I’m not a good person.
Well, you don’t have to be a good person, as long as you’re not an asshole. It doesn’t matter what other people think about you. It only matters what you think, and if you are willing to improve on it. I’m trying to better myself by spending more time with my family. There is always something you can do to be a better person, not for someone else, but for you. I’m still rooting for you.
I’m an asshole apparently.
Is there nobody who would miss you?
It sounds like you’re going though a tough time. I haven’t been in your exact situation, but I’ve had a few severe depressive episodes before. While I can’t help improve your material conditions, I can at least offer some general advice for managing symptoms of depression.
In the short term, keep active. I know it sounds pointless or completely unrelated. I felt the same way, but over time it really does affect your overall mood. Go for walks, do some push ups, or find some other light exercise that works for your fitness level.
Make sure you get the right amount of sleep. With depression, some people stay in bed napping all day, and others hardly sleep at all. I tend to stay up way too late. Try to keep a regular sleep schedule. It really does have a huge impact on cognitive function.
In the longer term, find a local group where you can regularly interact with people over a shared common interest. A book club, a bowling league, community theater, whatever you’re into.
Losing your job could be a blessing in disguise. It doesn’t sound like you were particularly fond of the old job. Now you have a chance to find something better. Be grateful that you a family you can live with in the mean time. Some people aren’t so fortunate.
I don’t know you, but I hope things get better for you.
You can be happy without a woman and without kids. As it turns out, it usually works best to be happy by yourself first, if companionship is what you want. Learn to love yourself before loving others. Keep trying.
That’s the best I could do, hope it helps. Good luck to you.
You can be happy without a woman and without kids.
I mean, just ask any gay guy.
I will never love myself.
Never is a long time m8. With those kinds of thoughts, I think you need professional help. My wife has dealt with similar things and getting therapy and medication really helped.
At the end of the day, your brain is just chemistry and sometimes the chemistry is just doing bad stuff. Go to therapy and get some medication. It will help, really.
The level of bullshit coming out of your mouth will not be fixed by platitudes like “love yourself”. You need medication.
I don’t like overdramatic depressed people so I’m not going to discuss this with you, I’m just giving this advice and dipping.
Ignore what everyone else says. It’s useless advice. Talk to a doc and get the right drugs. You may never love yourself, but we have wonderful pills that will change who you are. That person will love himself. Whatever sad creature you are now won’t exist anymore.
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Responding in such a harsh and dismissive way to someone who may be struggling with their mental health is really not okay. Calling their feelings “bullshit” and “overdramatic” is incredibly invalidating.
I know you meant well but the overall tone here is way too critical and potentially damaging to someone in a vulnerable state.
They didn’t mean well. You’re giving them way too much credit
Platitudes won’t help…but surely being an asshole to them will, right? Just shut the fuck up if you that’s the only “advice” you can muster.
The point of living is to enjoy yourself, you can go about that any way you like really. You don’t need to do the cookie-cutter meet-someone-and-start-a-family life to be happy.
Find something that makes you feel happy (or at least less shit) and do more of it. If you find enough things, you might find you can turn one into a job that you don’t hate.
You’ve not lost the game if you’re still playing.
What’s the point of living for anyone? There’s no point. Life is what you make out of it. If one keeps doing the same things day after day then that’s an indication they don’t want things to change. How could they change? Accepting things as they are and just sitting at home being miserable is a guranteed way to stay miserable.
The things you listed is what society wants you to do, not what you want to do. Do some hard thinking what YOU want to do with your life and what is important to you; nothing else will give you peace and fulfillment. You can set some long term goals if you want, but from experience i tell you to start with something small and keep that up, that’s hard enough as it is.
If what you achieve and what you want is not the same, you will not be happy at all.
I don’t anything for myself though.
You must want something if you want to stop being unhappy. What would you change in your life if given the option?
Being born rich.
If you were born rich what would you want to do?
Here’s the thing, if living in your general geographic area doesn’t suit you, then finding a new geographic area might. If you stay in your room, how will you meet that companionship? Make those friends? Meeting people and making friends takes effort and this also means traveling. So find a shitty job that pays enough for you to safe some money and take a trip, they aren’t that expensive if you do your research, and who knows, you may meet someone that makes you stay, but at least you’ll be doing something FOR YOU!
From one depressed person to another, all I can say is what’s wrong in fucking trying one more thing.
Definetly ask me if you want some tips on traveling since I try going on 3-4 trips a year to help with my depression.
Dude I’m a poor immigrant without a job. I can’t do any of that. Plus moving scares me.
You are here every week posting this exact same shit. People have tried to help you and give you real advice. You don’t want help, you want attention. The Internet isn’t your therapist and you don’t want to listen anyways. Stop wasting everyone’s time.
Oh man, I didn’t know that there was a whole history of repeating the same posts. I hope some passerby who relates to the post can gain from the outpouring of advice etc here
Are they deleting their old posts?
They also seem to be full of shit, considering in one breath they say they’ve never been with a woman but also just recently commented they isolated and drank after a breakup in another thread.
Very weird.
No. The last one about giving up losing weight is still up and the ai girlfriend one as well.
Nope, they are all still there. “When did you stop caring about how you look”, “summer is the worst season”, “what does it feel like to be with a woman”. Dude is depressed, depressing, creepy, and doesn’t want help - he just wants attention.
But they don’t want a therapist. And they don’t want advice. So I guess they just want the attention. Or pity. Hard to tell which.
I think it’s pity
This is likely the third time I’ve seen this dude posting “woe is me” here, getting amazing great advice to see a therapist, and completely fucking ignores it.
OP go see a fucking therapist.
I still like to think I’m there for him if he needs someone. It doesn’t feel like myself to be dismissive like that.
