All things in moderation, if that’s what floats your boat. I just know it can be some kinda D=!

Big hugs, sis. I hope you find comfy ways to feel safe.

Please reconsider if you’re thinking about leaning into a substance to avoid hurt feelings ;_;!

I knew two gals who did just this and ended up burning out so hard it almost killed them. So you know, try and be careful. Cause it really isn’t worth it. I think there’s like…healthier ways. I mean the disassociation I’ve go no advice on, but the alcohol - that’s the one I am talking about.

Yes, I hate the way that people in media thought they could empower women by creating absolutely moronic and attractive male characters that they could sexually harass. Like, what!? That’s not the way! I think people in general need more support because we’ve sort of nullified the way support networks used to exist.

No worries, as you can see I love seas of text. I’m a conversationalist, and some of my best moments have been just sitting and talking with folks of all kinds. So eh, I’m loving it =)!

My grandfather he did calligraphy. It was something he picked up in the military, and he kept it with him always. He actually journaled regularly, He told me to pick up the habit, and it’s actually why I do it. I don’t know if he’d agree with my chaotic manner, but I think he’d be happy that I do it at all. I never looked at his journals, because I think looking at people’s personal stuff is rude unless you’ve got explicit permission. I have heard though, from my mother after his passing that they were practically like records.

Many moons ago I went to school with a bunch of Brazilians and I thank god for their awesomeness! A lot of folk I knew explicitly used pencil sharpeners. They were on the walls of every school I saw. Electric ones in every office. I didn’t even know you could pull out a knife and sharpen them, although if you really think about it - of course you can! The Brazilians kept their pencils in tin cases (something I absolutely love to do nowadays), and sharpened them with box-cutters and it gave me that “aha!” moment and made my life! I like that you cut to the chase, and remove the plastic element. I think I might lean into that too, as I am always trying to think of ways to be a more sustainable individual.

Yeah, apologies! I don’t take a lot of pictures anymore, because I think phones are creepy fucks. My mother is getting older and she can’t/won’t learn new things. She loves Apple, and I can’t get her to migrate to anything else so I keep a very old (It’s pretty much an Iphone 5) phone around to stay in touch with her. I just don’t agree with any mega-corporations privacy policies, and so I just decided to pretty much not use my phone unless I am talking/texting with someone I love. It’s nice because I never pull the sucker out in public. It’s bad because I have stopped visually recording my life in many ways. Yet, I still can’t justify an external camera because I just don’t think I’d use it enough to keep it. I’m a little mama (as in, I am short and tiny) so when I go into nature, I am not looking to carry something around that can leave me vulnerable. Which kinda scratches that off the list as well. I know most hikers are nice, but that’s er…most of them, not all. Eh! People pick victims they know they can take advantage of, and I think a sizeable pre-teen could take me so eh =P!

Quite nice! Hahaha! My secret was that I wanted something I could balance on one knee and be able to draw on without much fuss. I’ve got a new pad of paper, I think I should start considering making a new guy to take around. You’ve got me having the itch for it =)! I always cover my things in fabric, because I like to pick out beautiful patterns and utilize them. I also like the soft texture when you grab it. The geeky little stealthy individual in me also likes that people can’t really identify what they hey I am holding right off the bat. I really like your design by the by! Looking at that spine “wow-ed” me! It’s ingenious! The way I allowed for less/more depth is by sewing a “travel” piece of cloth between the two boards I had. That way if I wanted to add a bit more paper, I could and it had some give, but otherwise the front overlapped the back by just a bit. Not too much, because paper isn’t the thickest but I am sure you get the idea!

I have a poor technique when drawing. I wish I didn’t. I even trained not to, my hand just NEEDS to touch the paper, I am not sure if it’s for stabilization, or what. It’s kind of how I have always worked (I have been drawing since I was a tiny little bean) and it’s how I am the most comfortable. It drives my partner crazy, because she uses those old masters style of pencil holding (where you hold it by the end) and never touches the paper outside of setting it. So she’ll be really loose on the hold, and here I am like a little gremlin hunched over (I know it’s bad for the back, but I love feeling “captivated” and this is a part of the process, I am totally going to have a hunch when I am an old lady =P!) and choking the pencil. I feel sort of like a printer, that is jumping all over the place in one area and printing out bits of an image line by line. But damned if that doesn’t bite me in the ass if I smudge. I know smarter folks use a piece of paper as a barrier between, but I guess I am not smarter folks because I never seem to learn my lesson =P! I just integrate oopsies into my drawings like tattoo artist do cover ups. I stare at those beautifully thin and gliding pen tips (with that liquidy ink) and I run in terror of them. Just because I have such a messy technique =P! I have trouble controlling them, and a cheap and fat ballpoint does me better than a loose and quick tip because there’s still a bit of grip. The friction gives you time to sort of think of where you’re going next, and I need that thinking power honestly. I think it might literally be the difference between a second (I just mimed it), but it really does make a difference to me.

Which is quite funny, because digitally I use nibs for art =P! But everything glides digitally, so there it’s more so a matter of point.

I have never heard of Zettelkasten, no lie! I think index cards for journaling is quite awesome though! I had thought about it after hearing about my grandfather’s passing because they were trying to figure out what to do with his scores of journals. I wondered if there were a process you could follow that could be both neat and compact and that was the system I came up with. I am so apprehensive of digital records for a multitude of reasons. I think it’d clearly be the winner here, but I think it loses both privacy and comfort. I am going to read more about this technique you use, it sounds really interesting. I know this is going to sound psychotic, but when I am done with one of my notebooks, I cannibalize it with a knife until it’s little bits and then toss it. Which, probably isn’t the best solution for keeping records. Especially because I fill them with not only my feelings but ideas and comments. In a perfect world I’d set them on fire, but it seems dangerous nowadays to do so. I see it as sort of a letting go process, but I should probably look into ways to keep the ideas | records separate from the | raw stuff =P!

My friend who bu-jos by the by indexes everything. She’s so freakin’ brilliant she blows my mind on the regular.

I am in flux, I am old stuff and new stuff all the same. There is an artist I once heard who described herself as “I never knew I was old, until I went to the doctors and they told me I was.” I think I might always be that way. I’m a firecracker by birth, and I think even if I am hobbling around in a rambler or something I will probably still be one. I come from some proud people, and I think there’s just a little warrior spirit in my bones. Catch is I see myself slowing down, health issues tackled like they aimed to maim and the hair is no longer a pure beautiful raven black like it used to be =P!

People have always fascinated me, so I have taken in all kinds of interests (media I suppose is what I am talking about here generally) and tucked them away into folds of myself. I like it because most things that I like tend to have a reason, as in a story that I can associate them with that typically ties to a person. I figure that way even if they’re out of your life (for whatever reason) you can always bring them with you. And personally, I think appreciation of one’s spirit is perhaps the highest compliment you can send to someone =P! Even if they don’t know it. That is to say, Harvey is one of those things, but I really do enjoy the flick and I hope (guys?) do as well =)!

Oh yeah, no okay so umm goofabout talk here on the television thing. My partner NEEDS television in her life, I need television away from my life. As in, I cannot think with it in the room, or at least that’s sort of how it’s been for me. I have gotten used to it, but it still sort of hurts to be honest. I think there’s an evil curse that actual televisions cast into the air. I know it sounds woo-woo but they just change the dynamic of a room. I actually welcome them in hospitals and what not, even if it’s garbage on because I don’t really mess with my phone so instead I just kind of sit around doing nothing for however long it takes (which sometimes can be hours). I tried to get her to meet me on this, but realized she just NEEDS a television in order to function. I really wish I were joking, but it’s just how it is for her. So I’ve invited them back into my life. But also, even when I didn’t have one I like media, just in a way that I can control it. So if a buddy recommends something, or if it’s something that I am interested in I will watch it. I had a friend (we’ve gone different ways just because of life) who was a stand-up comedian. He loved, loved, loved Bojack Horseman, so I gave it a go. To be honest it’s pretty freakin’ depressing and destructive and not totally my bag. There is a character on it who is eternally upbeat but is also a bit of an airhead. I sadly identify about ten folds with his existence and told my friend as such, because he told me he identified with Bojack. While I love positivity, I do recognize that toxic positivity not only ostracizes but also kills. So I think it’s good to see the positives but also hold space for others (and all the emotions). Cause otherwise positivity can run everyone and everything out of the room.

My partner had to go do some errands, so I am waiting for her to come back before we go on our little adventure. I’m glad I got this time to respond to you =)! I will look into how to join this instance (?yet again, is it called that? Idk?) and report back! Be well!

Hehe! Hey! I’m a sleepy one, so I might respond with more goob than usual. I like to use these natural wooden pencils to draw and write with. For the longest I would only allow myself to use pens, as I liked the flow of ink (ballpoint sans gel so I guess I would hate monte blanc stuff cause I heard it’s buttery smooth) and I wanted to fight my perfectionist tendencies by taking away the ability to erase things. I’m much happier now after years of training doing stuff like that, but revisitng pencils felt like meeting up with an old friend. I like that with a single pencil and some mindful technique you can do quite a variety of work. The pencils came with the sharpener (believe it or not) and I figured might as well have a meet b. Before I was hacking at stuff with an xacto like an animal. Your design is much cleaner and minimalist as compared to mine (although we have parts that meet for sure). I would stick a Japanese style break-off razor on there before I stuck a boxy little sharpener. I think it’d fit the vibe more too. You could always run it across your pants pending they could take it, before putting the knife back after sharpening.

I swear, I started with my design sort of open face sandwich and when I added that flap to enclose the whole thing it all came together and I loved it even more. I like your design, and it probably isn’t that thick, so it is something to consider because it does add girth to the design. Which kindaaa, makes it less portable. I mean not too much, but it did take up more space in my bag, which is just a tiny little sling. All space counts in that situation.

I actually secretly love a mean blunt pencil, it glides really well (I think blunter is? Idk. I am not a word-wizard. I figure as long as you convey the idea, eh!) and it has a pleasurable feeling. I don’t remember how I got a hold of these things when I was younger, but I had a couple of carpenter pencils (I haven’t used them in years, I should give them a go again) and they were blunt as the days are long and damned if I don’t miss that feeling so I totally get it if you’re just highlighting stuff with it. The reason why I need that mean sharp point is because I like to doodle little fine details and they’re hard to get without something you could spear a fish with.

I totally want to join this journaling er…instance? I just literally don’t know how and my brain is too sleepy-dumb to figure it out. I journal on the regular, in a half-composition book because I am fancy like that. I have a friend who bu-jos like a boss. I gave it a go and realized I need my journal to be sloppy, because I want it to hold space for me. As in, if I am regulating heavily (which I think bullet journals are) then I am afraid that I will BE afraid to put the things I am honestly thinking and feeling on to the paper and hence will not get the things I need to get out, out. I think if I make it more of a organized reflective process it might just become the flossing of writing and I just don’t think I need that in my life personally. However, it’s damn near impossible for me to find the things that I have sprawled out on the pages like the organized folks do. So you know, it’s more of a splatter piece and that does have its downsides as well.

If you do know how I can join this via piefed, I am absolutely there. Or anyone else, or I will give the docs a lookie loo tomorrow-ish? Sometime soon, depending on plans =)!

I love Muttley, he’s such an ass! Hahahaha! I mean, idk if you’re an ass - you don’t seem it, but damned if that guy isn’t a little cheeky bastard. Speaking of cheeky bastards, have you ever seen the movie Harvey? Cause it sounds like you might like Trickster characters, and while it’s got some bits of its age I absolutely love this film. I showed it to my gal, who hates “old stuff” and she ended up bewitched by it and just knowing that puts a smile on my face. To be honest, and I feel so damned ashamed saying this - I think if I were translated into a cartoon character I’d end up being like Mr. Peanut Butter from Bojack. I had a friend who was obsessed with the show and I told him as such and he actually agreed. Bubble headed or not. Eh!

Either way, it’s been an incredible pleasure to have “met” you and regardless of if we can figure out the link thing or not I thank you very much for all this fun conversation =)!

This shows you why echo chambers of all designs are bad. It’s why I hate the down vote arrow, and wished that it disappeared off the face of this planet. People got frustrated when that happened with Youtube though, so shrugs. Please keep being a witty one =)

I want to get grumpy here and say that watching their edutainment documentary on ____ (fill in the blank queer subject because I don’t remember the focus), that introduced me to Christine Jorgensen and had clips of her performing made my LIFE! I think they were from the Library of Congress or something, and who the hell knows if they even exist anymore. She did a cover of Welcome to my World that took the tune from a old crooner song to this upbeat fun and flirty jam and it was absolutely mesmerizing. That was just a ten second clip too, but it was so wonderful. I had another grumpy pants moment tonight when I talked about how happy people are post-transitioning and how frustrating it is to me that people can see transjoy and think “I want to smash that.” I mean I have met so many transfolx who have this deep seated awful pain that pretty much saps the life from them until they get the right support they need. It’s like night and day. I just don’t get it. We don’t recruit, even though we used to chant it to scare the straights. Really, we just make people more aware of the possibilities of who they could be if they want to be said way. Youth explores, I’ve known a LUG or three in my lifetime. I think exposure to a wide range of folks in media helps people. I know I was happy the first time I saw someone who looked like me on a TV, and it damn near took 25 years or so to do it. So yeah, it’s important. I really hate this happened, but hopefully they’ve just archived them for later. You can’t fuck with the bag in this world.

Me too, actually. Hehehehe! To be honest with you, I think my favorite state in the Midwest is WI, gotta love those lakes in Madison. I swore to myself at a young age that I wouldn’t “backtrack” which means I want to keep living in new states cause life is short and it’s important to get in all you want to get in before you get too old or tied down to do so. Only state I am willing to revist is Eastern PA, cause I lived on the other side and it’s practically two states put into one. One of my close friends lives in MI, but we met in IL she’s in the Kalamazoo area. Some bent part of me wants to go to the UP, but I think it’d be an easier sell not to look towards the SE side. Especially cause there’s puffins, and who doesn’t love to see little puffins hanging out? I will say Detroit last time I went through had some of the saddest architecture I’ve seen in my life (I’m sure you know where I’m talking about). Looked firebombed. I think it’s flipping though, and I know there’s a bustling art scene. I think my favorite thing about the Midwest as a whole is how kind folks are. It’s not always there, but when it is it’s real genuine. It’s actually that genuine spirit I like about the East too, although it’s not the same scene obviously. I just like that organic energy, people acting as they think/want. Of course I tend to stay away from the water cracker folks out East, so that might be different with that old money kind.

A friend of mine who is from MI (but not the gal I am talking about) lamented the winters there. Said the snow never seems to end, the wind is brutal and it rolls off the lake with a fierce misery (because it’s to the East, you know). He also hated the basements, most of which are unfinished and dungeonous. Hehehe!

Either way, I hope you’re air quality is doing okay. I am not sure what exactly is going on, but these wildfires have been killer for the air. Thanks for responding back by the by =)

Hahahaha, you’ve got me cracking up here! Apologies for the assumption! I love the creativity though, seriously!

Oh yeah, no worries and thanks back! The little suckers can get stuck in anything, so I pretty much just try to keep them from killing themselves =P! Their cuteness and love helps. Hahahaha! We craft so damn much for them. I swear 1/2 our brain is forever occupied by their happiness. We like to take sand, rocks, rice and beans and put them together for some solid and crazy digging. Dirt is too dirty, and ends up getting all over the place. We’ve gone ham with the ping-pong balls. Better ones are those little golf balls with the holes in them, the practice ones. Cause they can be lifted and carried around like prey. It’s pretty awesome to watch. I take scraps of clothing and fill em up and sew them into little sack guys and let them carry them around everywhere. I am seriously going to start saving the rolls though and turn them into something cool thanks to you. I was just recycling them with a shrug, my brain was not being creative enough =P!

Aww man, I hear that on studying horticulture. One of the coolest people I have met in my entire life (passionate) was a horticulture instructor. I don’t get why we give what we give more pay than other things. It’s an incredibly skilled position that can be laborious on the mind and the body. I have a friend who is absolutely brilliant, but an anthropologist and hot damn she gets paid absolute dirt. I really love the sprouting thing though, seriously!

As for the egg carton walls, that would make a lot of sense. It makes me want to go back in time and grab this porch full of egg cartons I saw someone have when I lived in a rural space. I don’t know why they were saving them (it was seriously like five feet of cartons stacked) but perhaps they were using them for something and just kept them outside until it was time to have at them.

Aww man, Frozen addiction is a real thing! Hahaha! I have seen it. I have heard from other mothers that one of the nicest/most profound moments of their motherhood is seeing young girls unite in song together, and the joy they feel in sharing the moment. I don’t have any kids, but I often think about how I never fed my dog “people food” and then one time my dad met her and slipped her McDonalds fries ad it was game over after that. I think you’ve gotta balance things really tightly nowadays. On one hand, you can keep your kid sheltered from media but it sort of ostracizes them socially. On the other hand you allow your kid freedom to zombie out on media and their brain kind of rots. It’s really rough, I don’t do it but I have a couple of friends who have youngins (surprising way less than you’d imagine) and I have seen some scary effects of too much screen time/processed foods.

To be honest, one of the biggest things I lament personally is that I have had to learn pretty much ever skill I have by myself. By that I mean, I had to study relatively solo to gain any knowledge I had. I had pretty absent parents, which I think has sort of made everything a bit more difficult than it has needed to be as a whole. Sorry if that was heavy, but I swear it relates to what I want to say. Which is that when you teach your daughter skills, even if she isn’t actively participating but instead watching and witnessing your process - I think these things stay with you for life. I also think learning skills early is really important, because even if you’re not terribly interested in them (although it sounds like she loves the results so she probably is) you can carry them with you for life. Sewing is one of those skills that I think a lot of us have forgotten and it’s incredibly useful for a multitude of things. Perhaps even the most useful for the abstract knowledge of knowing that if something breaks, you can probably fix it. Likewise that if you want something, you can probably create it with enough thought and know-how. At one point, I was working with a lot of youth, and they severely lacked in an understanding of both of these things and I think it gives your daughter some secret knowledge that links us to the root of what makes humans, human (ingenuity) =P!

Eh! I’ve gotta say, I can tell you love it from here by the by! My sis(ter from another mister) just had a little girl. The happiness and love overflows and fills my heart, and this kind of stuff is why I think some folks need hugs over anti-natalist pamphlets =P!

Either way sis, keep being you. By that I mean awesome! Seriously, we need more light in this world, so keep spreading it =)! Mental hugs, and I hope to see you around here =)

Back at you =) <3!

Oh shit okay, I get it now totally! Yeah, there have been a handful of times when standing next to trucks that I have wondered how anyone gets things safetly up and down on their beds without breaking their backs. This makes sense! I am glad you found a way to make a cheap utility out of used stuff because I bet you some kind of official plate has a crazy markup and you probably don’t need it often.

It’s rough when you can make a million things that are beautiful, but they do not have mass appeal or relation to pop-culture so they are a hard sell. Actually, idk if that’s the case or if you’re a reseller so I guess in my head I made it romantic but you could just be out here thrifting =P! In which case I say - you win some, you lose some.

Believe it or not, I cannibalized the back pad of some watercolor paper when I had finished the lot and legitimately built a micro portable (A6-ish) sketchbook kinda like that. I had some cool boho-y fabrics and I covered the outside with it. I had a little pencil sharpener that I sewed into the inside, along with a pencil holder and then trimmed cardstock (I shit you not!) and put them on the inside in a pocket I made to hold it. Then I sewed a little pocket that wrapped around it to keep it closed (it opened vertically - and put a gummy eraser in it in case I needed it (although I don’t really believe in erasing much)). I had that guy for a couple of years, but I am sadly allergic to cats and one of the places we moved had a crap-ton of dander and I really couldn’t salvage much of the fabric-based stuff I had. I think it’s nice to have a little portable sketchbook you made, it makes you feel connected to it. I tend to work with individual papers too, as I find an entire blank journal to be quite intimidating but singular sheets to be an absolute joy. I too used my led light to clamp on to mine. I think we might be the same person, so you might as well take off your Scooby Doo mask and reveal it =P!

One thing I would really like to get into is wood. I have been thinking about getting a handsaw, because we move a crazy amount and non-compact tools aren’t on the agenda right now. Ah, yeah - you get it actually I see that! Also on your caddy, I think it works plenty fine. When living in spaces with limited storage you get really creative with the ways you tend to go about things. Either way thank you for sharing such a detailed response and keep being a practical craftsperson. Cheers!

Yes, I feel the same way. Half of my family does Origami, and I joke that my brain didn’t get that spatial bit. I mean eye measurements, goal! I can do that. Folding paper, yeah okay I can do that. Something gets lost along the way reading those diagrams though, it kind of feels like those old art examples where you followed along and it jumps up too far. Meanwhile I get photos of crazy stuff my folks have made, all these intricate and interwoven patterns. Just sitting around. In fact, when we get together - same thing. Just sitting there making insane things that are just manifesting from their mind to paper. I think it’s insane! I like to keep the mysticism of life though, and some things I like to just think of as witchcraft. It makes me happy that way =)!

Love that! I miss the Midwest terribly, and have been trying to express it’s wholesome mystique to my partner to siren song her to move there.

Hehehehe! So I am a goober about this. I’m adhd af, and I am currently taking a medication that has me having to be off my other meds so I have full blown monkey brain right now. I don’t mind, I like to think of it as just my goofy side coming out. I gotta tell you this though sister, brother - whomever. Cause I love your post to death. So the one time. ONE TIME! That I got myself to make something with Sculpey. Cause I have grabbed it before, and it ended up going to other homes because I would just leave it in the little brick or jar or whatever I mixed it into. The one time I got myself to sit there and put together a sculpture, it was beautiful. I was proud of it. I had this painting I made, and I turned it into a sculpture and I was a proud one and it was time to bake it and it ended with that. I cannot tell you why my brain does what it does, but damned if it’s not been my best friend and worst enemy my entire life. Hehehehe! It ended up looking like melted goo by the time I lumped it back together and tossed it back in the container I grabbed it from. Writing? I’ll do that. Drawing? Yeah. Painting, fuck yeah - where the brushes at? Singing, all day. I’ll fill the room. My brain bits just do what they want to do and I have so little control of pushing myself in the opposite direction even medicated. You got some wheels turning though, and maybe I’ll get back to giving it a go. Also, I actually lied, *I’ve known two sculptors in my life. My sister from another mister sculpted in school many moons ago and she too made mugs and she made me one and I still keep my pens and such in that sucker to this day on my desk cause damned if I don’t love that she made me a mug. So I bet you that folks you make those for probably feel the same way. Either way big mental hugs and keep spreading the love and the spirit =)!

p.s. - *If this is your work, you’re a great sculptor. If this is someone you follow, they are a great sculptor. Growing up, stoneware was seen as like this beautiful artful thing. A thing of reverence in my family. Something used for special times, stuff given as wedding gifts and what not. This stuff reminds me of that, and it’s nice =)!

I have always felt this way Space Ghost, only catch is I think we might be in the minority =X!

I know someone who bemoans that mainstream individuals talk so much about transfolx because she wants to live a simple and quiet life and she feels when all eyes are pointed on transissues (love it or hate it) it makes her life more complicated. Also folks often think that all people of whatever outgroup they’re looking at is just like one monolithic thing. It’s why people who get into positions of authority are seen as the “spokespeople” for their group. I do think conversing is the bridge to building better relationships in most situations. I have sat down with a biggot or three and been fine because I found our middle ground, even though if I had my choices I wouldn’t even be sitting there with them. Cause fuck racists. Fuck homophobes, etc. But I try to see the human in folks, and humans are sloppy fucks.

I just also get that people are fatigued of having to demystify their humanity for others. By that I mean, I know a lot of black folk who are tired of trying to express that they’re humans to racist. They’re tired of trying to stand up for the entirety of their ethnicity just cause folks can’t get off their asses and educate themselves on why thinking people are below someone because the color of their skin (might) be different than their own. I also know there’s like…the right way and right people to talk to…er…other folks. By that I mean, I sure as fuck am a bag of wind and I might not be the right person to convey big ideas in short concise sentences. In this day and age, a lot of folks need big ideas turned into sound bites. They need space to mull things over. In my head, the best conversations are long drawn out back and forths. This isn’t really par the norm nowadays.

I got all ranty and dumb. Idk if any of what I said made any sense, I am about to zzz off. All things aside, another thing I heard was that a trans individual I know thinks that cis folk hate trans folk because they feel “tricked” by them. Idk. I will say that I wish we all lived in Shangri-La, and that folks were kinder to one another. I will also say that even with the term “bottom-surgery” it tends to be more of a transman type lingo as far as I know unless stuff changed (cause I know you can say giving head for gals or guys so idk). Shrugadugdug. You could find a way to make things more accessible to folks if you want. But equally, be safe if you do. Cause people out here target transfolx and they truly want them dead.