I’ll go firstt:
1: Regularly thinking that girls got all the cute clothes
2: Buying female clothes (skirt and some underwear) for “cross dressing”
3: Feeling physical pain when having to put off bought female clothes to go outside
4: Imagining yourself as the women in porn (that’s why I at first though I was “just gay”)
5: Being sad when thinking about trans people and realising I couldn’t transition because I’m not trans
6: Absolutely suppressing every form of thought when thinking about “the trans topic” (in a way that sometimes I reflected myself and thought that I may be trans, but I 100% suppressed those thoughts knowing damn well, that this wasn’t that much of a good strategy. This also included the thought “acts trans, looks trans, probably is trans”, that crossed my mind after taking LSD for the first time)
7: Dissociating kinda regularly. Happened usually when reading fantasy books. Didnt realise it was dissociation until like 3 weeks ago
Probably missed some stuff but those are the most significant ones. Quite a lot of stuff are signs that appears around the last year or so.
Lots of relatable experiences itt. I’ll add a couple things
*For a school assignment, I was required to call myself a crossdresser for a day and it felt like it was a little too on-the-nose for what was mostly supposed to be a silly scarlet letter assignment.
*I realized I specifically wanted an orchi and tried looking up excuses to get one without considering side effects (didn’t realize loss of hormone production without replacement was a problem) or considering that it might somehow be related to related to gender. I had 0 clue why it was so appealing and I refused to think about that for even a second.