I prefer web over app. I tried a site which was said to be free. signup was fine so i started to use the site only to realise to see my matches or start chats i had to pay for a “premium” account or something. that really annoys me and it’s a waste of my time so does anyone know any good dating sites which are actually free, as in i don’t have to pay to use the site for what it should be used for? thx in advance 👍
oh and I’m looking for men, forgot to specify lol
I believe most apps can be used for free… to an extent. Just like mobile games they can very much be pay to win with many QoL features locked behind a subscription. I know you prefer web, so I’m mostly thinking of apps that also have a web interface. I’m also a woman and a similar age as you; I’ve given up on dating sites and apps to meet people. I do have friends that have had decent success with Bumble, Hinge (no web interface), and Boo. I’ve not looked into the full web-based ones in a long time, but even then I remember them being very limited without a subscription; I can’t imagine that’s changed. Best of luck girl 🩷 Online dating is a complete drain!
A friend of mine met her now husband and father of her child on the free tier of Plenty Of Fish. That was a decade ago though. I’m not sure if the service has degraded since.
Im a 40m divorcee and I am absolutely out of my depth thinking about dating.
I have looked at the apps and sites and they never go anywhere for me. No matches or conversations that go no where.
I sort of think that meeting someone will happen when it happens, but I really miss that excitement of learning all about someone and talking all night.
Im also interested in meeting someone outside of my country, because Id love to experience something new, but that makes me look like a scammer.
May the chances be in your favor, brother. 🤝
Dating sites are there to make money off of desperation. Matches are intentionally superficial or completely off base. They won’t give away a product that you are willing to pay for. Because then they lost two customers.
With the very big caveat that I’m 15 years out of date, you might see if OKCupid or Plenty O Fish are still around.
I would check for you but I’d rather not cause my wife to worry. I met her on OKCupid. If I remember correctly, searching was free but messages always were a paid service regardless of platform.
Messaging used to be free on OKC too. Paid stuff was only better search placement, maybe seeing your matches immediately, etc. No idea about now, I was also found by my wife there over a decade ago.
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Yeah, Match.com isn’t satisfied until everyone is miserable.
It’s weird to think about how dominantly successful any app that took a principled position and resisted enshittification starting in 2010 would be now.
OkCupid was amazing 15 years ago, but it’s pretty shit now. For what OP is looking for, it’s probably still the best option, but it’s a very low bar.
OP, if you want to check out OkCupid, message me. I can set you up with a couple of browser scripts I wrote to improve the website experience. One will show you your matches’ photos. You won’t be able to view their profiles, but people that like you will generally show up in the profiles you’re shown pretty quickly, so it’s easy to find them. The other will need to be slightly tailored to you if you want to use it, but it will automatically skip any profiles that are showing to you that don’t meet your minimum requirements, and even alert you if one of them liked you instead of just skipping it, just in case you’d like to give it a closer look before you make a final decision.
Edit: Based on my experience the last time I was on the apps, the best one was Hinge, but I’ve been off of them for a year now. It’s also entirely app based.
Hinge won’t even show a landing page with “privacy enabled”
Agreed, OkC used to be quite all right but they took away so much of what made it unique.
I would be interested in such scripts. Why not share them here? 🙏
Honestly, apps (web included) in 2025 are just profit farming. It will be hard to get anything substantial from the experience.
Best suggestion is avoid OLD and just meet people in person. Get a hobby and attend things and eventually you will find like minded people.
Things like rock climbing, board games, cycling, etc. Hobbies that have places you go to and do a thing.
Sorry I don’t have any better suggestions 🤷♂️
I never gave HER a dime but it was the platform I met my eventual wife on. However unless you’re looking to meet other ladies, it’s probably not the app for you.
I tried HER years ago and left unimpressed. I found my partner of 5yrs on OkCupid though
OkCupid is a dead/dying site. It sounds like you specifically got off it just as it started its decline.
It’s probably not any worse than Tinder though. On account of match.com buying both…
I once had a date with a pole dancer off Her. I never mention it, constantly.
Yeah I should’ve specified I’m after guys lol I’ll edit my description
I hate to be a downer, but…
Building, running and maintaining a website isn’t free. Building, running and maintaining a popular website is fucking expensive. Somebody’s got to pay those bills.
As the saying goes, if it’s free, you’re not the customer, you’re the product. Corollary, if it’s not free, you still might be the product.
Furthermore, these days I would assume that 99.9% of profiles on a “free” dating site are scammers, or bots, or scammer bots, many of which are probably run by the people running the website.
And to double down on the downerism, subscription based dating sites/apps are financially motivated to keep you paying for as long as possible. They are not motivated to help you find a match, cancel your subscription, and live happily ever after.
In an attempt to not be a total downer jerk, my suggestion would be to find local meetup groups that interest you (even if just barely) and start going to those consistently.
That’s how I met my spouse almost 14 years ago. We were both on the dating apps but not finding each other. Eventually we met through a meetup group that I ran, and after months of casually chatting occasionally at group meetings, sparks spontaneously started flying. 🤷
While I understand what you’re saying, Okcupid was way better before match group bought it. They could make money and still have a useful website.
Sometimes it’s simply greed. :(
okcupid is what i used, but it was back before COVID
I hate to say this but there are still interesting people on Reddit.
Get out.
I like OK Cupid. It works perfectly without paying and matches are better as they are based on questions you answer and profiles contain more info. So it’s less evaluating lifestock like Tinder.
There’s also Bumble, it used to be that the woman needs to start talking when matched within 24h otherwise the match disappears. This is so women won’t get spammed by loads of men. I heard they would change it, but I’m not sure if they actually did. It works fine without paying.
There’s Boo, which I think is mostly for autistic and introvert people. Works fine with the free version.
There’s Feeld, which works great without paying. The focus is mainly on sex, not so much relationship material imo.
There’s Boo, which I think is mostly for autistic and introvert people. Works fine with the free version.
Oooo… I’m gonna have to try this one.
I’m not a big fan though. It’s also a sort of social media. There are many people on there from Asia and Africa, cluttering the user base.
I had 3 matches which ended in extended conversations, but in all 3 cases (don’t know if it’s coincidence) they were trying to cheat on their partner. I’m poly, I don’t mind sharing, but cheating on someone is not going to happen with me.
About poly, OK Cupid has the option to say you’re monogamous, polyamorous (with account links possible) or open to either. So it’s a great app for finding poly people or focus on mono people without matching with the poly ones (saves a conversation)
Yeah… I have been on there since making that comment and just looking in a 40 mile radius, a majority of the profiles I am seeing are unvaccinated red hats. 😮💨
The idea is still nice, but… You’re still at the mercy of who is actually near enough to meet. And I live in dumbfuckville.
Sorry to say, but there’s no app available which creates better people in your town haha
Maybe move to a city?
OK Cupid has the option to set your location manually. You can check somewhere else if there’s someone nice. I hate this option, it clutters the app with Asian and African women wanting to meet someone abroad. But it may be nice for you to get better results.
Ok Cupid used to be kind that, but they completely butchered the question part of it, in my opinion it is no longer useful. Also as a white cis male you get spammed there by literally hundreds of accounts from the Philippines. Makes the whole thing useless in my opinion
Yeah that’s true. About 60% of the women I see are from Asia / Africa / South America.
I wish they would disable the custom location feature to solve this clutter.
I live in The Netherlands, there are enough people here on the app to make it worth while. It’s how I met my new partner.
I wish they would disable the custom location feature to solve this clutter.
It’s REALLY useful for travelling/migration. I made a penpal/IRL friend through there using this very feature. They should deal with it by reports and etc.
Yeah, that’s how I met my current partner. She lives in Portugal but had her location in my city. It does have benefits, but it also extremely clutters the app with gold diggers from the other side of the globe.
I live in The Netherlands, there are enough people here on the app to make it worth while. It’s how I met my new partner.
Congrats btw
Bumble did chenge that. Now the woman decides who has to start the convo once they match. You can also set some prompts for the other person to reply to.
OKC is basically 90% bots now. I have 100+ likes. None are from my area or even my country.
It’s called outside!
Joking aside, its fundamentally unlikely as if you’re not paying you’re the product and maintaining a dating network is a lot of work both in admin tasks, technical tasks and legal tasks.
I know, I know, but really, it’s better than any actual dating app.
Fasch Match is free. Even overwhelmingly loaded with CIS white male options.
Great question. Tried the paid thing (38f). Lots of decent (superficially) matches, none of whom shared my values or interest. It was a huge waste of money across apps.
