For me:
-
Monkeys and apes: they look too much like humans and expose many terrible traits of humans.
-
Greyhounds: their thin long body shape look weird to me.
You must log in or register to comment.
I agree with the mobkeys and apes. So many of them are evil jerks.
Cats: I had one that peed through three different couches
Domestic cats. Partly because they poop in my garden, but mostly because they’re secretly planning to take over the whole world and enslave the human race.
Nah squirrels are the real masterminds. You don’t fuck with squirrels
They enslaved the human race long, long ago.
Cats are mostly jerks, and I love them.
Horses.
Its an easily startled 900lb retard with sledgehammers for hands.
No its not majestic, keep it the direct fuck away from me.
I, too, share your hatred for horses. They are arrogant fucks who think they are better then everyone else. One exception: there’s these large horses with fluffy hooves and fat asses that seem to be chill and more like large dogs. You’re OK.
Horses are fucking douchebags. One ran me over back when I was 6 years old. I never forgave them.
Like the saying goes, if one horse ran you over, they all did.
- It’s* an easily startled
- it’s*a not majestic
Fuck off.
Horses are almost the worst, horae people are even worse. My girlfriend has a coworker and apparently all she does is talking about her horse and how unwell it is, and how fucking expensive the hose doctor, acupuncture, hose psychologist and keeping the horse in general is. One day she showed me a picture of her company dinner and i asked her which one the horse girl is. Of course she pointed at the 100+kg ork.
They also shove ginger in their butts to make them walk funny. Again, i don’t even like them, but they still don’t deserve to be ridden around or drove around in a trailer for hour. I would be a miserable cunt tooI was gunna ride a horse when I was real young. Was at a party or something cause there was a good amount of people there. I was next in line to ride said horse. The guy in front of me, being it was his turn, went to walk up to another horse. That horse was not a fan a bucked. Hoof straight to the side of the face. Down he goes.
Last thing I saw was him laying there motionless. Never learned anything else of it as everyone had to leave. Never tired to ride a horse from that day foward.
I’ll chill with some cows though
I wish I could find the original quote, but Sam Vimes, in one of Terry Pratchett’s books, says something to the effect of “being one of nature’s pedestrians. Never trust anything that looks at you with its teeth”
I’ve always found horses to be weird animals. They have personality, but have no expression outside of losing their shit. Their posture also looks uncomfortable as fuck, always being stood up, and being on small hooves despite being huge.
I’ve always said that they’re prisoners in their own bodies.
The cockatoos of New Guinea. They know what they did.
Monkeys are total assholes. They act just like 7 year old children would if they were high on sugar and there were no repercussions for their actions.
I don’t understand why some people find monkeys cute. They’re so ugly and obnoxious! They don’t even have the presence or majesty of great apes either. The further from humans on the evolutionary scale, the cuter primates tend to be IMO. By the time you get to lemurs, bush babies, etc, you’ve hit standard mammal cuteness.
I’m convinced like 95% of people that say they like monkeys have never interacted with one.
…and the final 5% are just lying…
Dogs with blue eyes look absolutely psychotic to me for some reason, like it’s indicative that they’re the serial killers of the canine world or something. It’s super unnerving. This doesn’t translate to any other animal for me; for instance I think blue-eyed cats are gorgeous.
What if they only have one blue eye?
Aww…
But then you also have these
This one still looks cute and cool to me. Yeah it is weird but in a good way.
That is one badass little buddy right there
To hell with cat eyes and wings, the new makeup trend is whatever we ended up calling this look
Yeah greyhounds look weird but they’re the sweetest dumbest most loving buddies
There’s that one guy that HATES sunfish.
This was a wild read
Pandas. They are too dumb to be alive. Their diet mostly consists of plants that have hardly any nutrition, and can’t be bothered to reproduce.
I guess some humans are pandas
This is a common belief thanks to terrible science comunication by journalists. I recommend the book The Truth About Animals: Stoned Sloths, Lovelorn Hippos, and Other Tales from the Wild Side of Wildlife by Lucy Cooke. It’s a fascinating read and has a chapter dedicated to how we’ve misunderstood and misrepresented pandas and sloths in the media.
Squirrels. Cute as hell in the wild, not so much in my attic. They are tiny little destructive machines.
According to the University of California’s Agriculture and Natural Resources department:
“Ground squirrels are associated with the spread of Rocky Mountain spotted fever, rat bite fever, tularemia, Chagas’ disease, adiospiromycosis, and encephalomyocarditis. Notably, they can serve as reservoirs for sylvatic (bubonic) plague, a highly infectious disease caused by the bacteria Yersinia pestis…People and their pets can get plague if they visit or live in areas where ground squirrels or other rodents are infected.”
Their PR team is doing great work
As a fellow Jay who has also had to deal with Squirrels in the attic, I wholeheartedly concur. Squirrels - what a bunch of bastards.
Sloths and praying mantis’ can fuck right off, they give me the creeps!
praying mantises* can
I’d like to add the sloth bear to your list
How dare you!
my spirit animal
fr sloths are so creepy
I don’t dislike most animals. I love all of God’s creatures… sometimes with barbeque sauce. Except chihuahuas, screw those guys
In all seriousness though, aside from the bitey and parasitic insects I enjoy animals for what they are. The only reason I dislike chihuahuas is their behavior within the realm of a domesticated animal. However, just like a small child that will kick you in the shins, punch you in the nuts, and scream until they get what they want, I’ve found with chihuahuas that punting them into a wall just once usually solves the problem.
My wife on the other hand does not like larger birds. She thinks chickens, ducks, and geese “look weird” and “shouldn’t be able to stand up, shaped like that”. She does, however, like them with barbeque sauce.
The only reason I dislike chihuahuas is their behavior within the realm of a domesticated animal.
Don’t blame the animal, blame the owners who fail to properly train them and let most troubling behaviour slip because “Isn’t it cute? 😍”. Now imagen the same behaviour from a dog 7 times its size and 20 times the weight. In essence most Chihuahuas are spoiled brats with a enabling parents.
Yep, badly behaved children. To be clear, i wouldn’t punt a chihuahua… unless it was actively biting me. Just like a goose. Or a toddler
Ducks and dolphins are the serial rapists of the animal kingdom.
Also koalas.
Ducks are also assholes for stopping traffic to cross the street. Fuckers can fly, but they decide to just waddle their dumbasses across busy streets.
True. From “aww” to “nope” as soon as learning the truths about dolphins.
and beavers, those ones also rape young penguins
Mice. Often times they’re branded as rodents and for a reason, because they tend to carry disease on them and aren’t around your home just to be cute either.
Uh… what?
They’re not rodents because they carry diseases. They’re rodents because they’re from the order “Rodentia”.
Pet mice are supposed to be clean, but I am still nervous with them. Especially those with red eyes.
The still poop and pee constantly but its clean I guess?
Often times they’re branded as rodents
But… I mean… they are?
