So I was hearing these radio people talking about first dates and they seemed to push the idea that it’s almost a given that people would be drinking alcohol on first date. As if it was a courtesy.
I was surprised to find after Googling this that maybe half of people online think the same meanwhile others are fine with just getting coffee or something.
I can maybe see how coordinating to maybe meet at a bar is somehow more feasible after work and perhaps works out better during the week VS having to go somewhere during the day on weekend but I would imagine it depends on the person.
I for one don’t understand how drinking makes sense where I’m at. Even I’m in a good metro area but I’d still have to go downtown to be walking to a bar. It’s the US, so I still feel that no matter what, people still have to drive. Why drink if you’re gonna drive?
What do you guys think? Does the date go smoother with an alcoholic drink? How have your experiences been and do you guys have a particular preference?
(Yes, I’ve never dated and therefore have no insight.)
There will be plenty of time as you get to know a person later on that you can meet at a bar for a drink which isn’t and shouldn’t be a big deal.
You can get to first know the person as is with a coffee. Coffee or tea doesnt change a personality. Alcohol can.
If they can’t handle just going for a coffee and get all weirdly defensive about you not having a drink that it’s a red flag.
Alcohol can mask if they are an alcoholic on your first meet. And if they are insistent about getting alcohol as a first meet and make it a big deal like it’s their ‘everything’ that is telling you they are likely an alcoholic. That’s how addicts are about the thing they are addicted to.
Red flags aren’t something you accommodate. It’s something you take as a warning sign.