I WFH, every year one of the goals that the rest of the team decides is that it’s “so great” to see each other in person. The past few years haven’t worked out but one did. I spent hours in a couple of airports, the huge expense for the company, I spent days away from my family, and for what? So you could look me in my same face you would see if we turned cameras on every once in a while? My husband says I’m being weird, but I legitimately want to know, what is the benefit? I hate being there and have to play nice so you can…look me even closer in the face?
I think its the older generation, boomers and above. They always need someone to talk to
I share the same opinion as you. My job is mostly remote, but I am required to come to the office (2 hour drive away) once every month or two (which has mostly come down to company meetings once every 2 months).
On the bright side, they book me a hotel room and compensate me for gas and wear-and-tear on my car, but pretty much when I get there, it’s a normal day with a scrum meeting almost first thing, which we do virtually almost always anyways, and then the same work I’d be doing at home, just at a cubicle. We sometimes go out for a group lunch, but most of the time we’re on our own (I don’t really eat lunch so I just grab a coffee), and then we have the company meeting which could 100% just be done virtually. My only real interaction with anyone in the office is greetings when people walk in and that’s pretty much it.
I’m with you, I really don’t see the benefit, and I know I can’t complain much because it’s not very frequent, but it’s still 4 hours of driving (which btw, I think I’m expected to not count as “work time”) and it doesn’t benefit me or anyone else I see anyways.
I find personally it’s easier and more relaxed to hang out in person. But that’s with friends, so unless you’re on close terms with everyone that does seem like a big hassle.
I wonder though where you meet up, and what you do. I can totally see myself wanting to do a meetup like that if it’s somewhere fun, like a big city, and there’s some events planned out.
We do this sometimes but just people who live near the city lol! I can’t imagine doing a meet up where you had to fly somewhere and my company sure as hell would never pay for it!
Seeing everyone in person can be kind of fun because we can have a real conversation that’s not being monitored… We mostly talk shit the whole time lol
Airports? Days? I live 30 mins walking distance from my office and I’m still not bothered to go there.
I’m in the same boat as you. It’s a waste of time for me, but others seem to need it.
It’s worth noting I have autism though. So social interactions don’t do much for me.
I realized in fairly early adulthood that I have traits that would have gotten me an Asperger’s diagnosis pre DSM changes so I relate.
Spent years making quarterly trips from outside Indy to upstate NY - somehow the boss thought it was good for morale or something.
What it was good for was reminding me how much I disliked that individual as a human being in general, and why I needed to GTFO there.
I find it difficult to put my penis in people of I don’t see them in person and I want to put my penis in people.
I have a slightly different perspective that hasn’t particularly been mentioned yet.
I think you agree that communication with your spouse and friends is better in person than online. Otherwise, why do you live together with your spouse? That’s the argument of the meet-in-office folks.
However, the difference is that you don’t care about or hate your job and/or coworkers. Other people, who push for these meetings, do not feel like this. Hence they enjoy the higher quality of relationship offered by occasional in-person time, but you don’t.
Well stated!
I would argue that the in person difference revolves around a lot of intimacy, and further encourages coworkers to ogle other members and increase the likelihood of sexual harassment or just office drama of coworkers now dating or having had a one night stand.
Personal life - better in person Work life - better separate
I’m not saying in office jobs are unhealthy or bad, just that if a job is remote, forcing them to get together when they took a remote job just promotes those things that they were avoiding for whatever reasons they applied for a remote job.
That’s a lot of mental hoops…
Forcing remote workers to go somewhere in person when they don’t sign up for an in person job. Glad to see you disagree, but by no means are there any hoops
Not sure if you even need to bring in a sexual component (dude?)…some people feel like their work colleagues are their “2nd family”. Mostly the ones that love to gossip and take a 10 minute break per hour to go to the break room to meet people.
None of which apply here, these are remote workers, being forced to go to an in person meeting. Those people you are talking about work in person jobs, unless the break room is their kitchen and their second family is a reference to having 2 families
Not sure about this.
I like my job, and my coworkers.
Do I like them enough to spend my own time going to see them instead of my family? Nope.
You can like people but prefer other people.
It’s hard to trust someone I’ve never met. I don’t want to travel either but I want to understand the people I work with in a way that’s only possible when we share space.
It’s work. It’s not always fun but that’s too be expected.
Agree. non-verbal comunication and body language, sincerity, humour, reactions and building trust are all things that are much easier in person.
If you can have that with the people you work with then it can makes work easier in all sorts of ways.
Because generally social interaction is easier and better face to face. You can read people’s facial cues better, have true eye contact, better hear the subtitles of voice and mood. People feel more connected with someone if they have met them face to face.
Alternatively, communication via email and video call can be hard and easily misread. People can misread emails as aggressive or be aggressive and not realise the impact. Communication on a video call, especially in big groups, can be difficult and impersonal.
Meeting up occasionally is probably seen as good a way to keep your team coherent and friendly. You’re more likely to be aware of the other person’s feelings if it’s someone you’ve socialised and spent time with. It’s easier to be empathetic and kind if you know that person in the flesh rather than just a name on an email or a random face on a video call. You’re more likely to make allowances for other people if you know about them and their circumstances.
When working remotely how many times do you have social calls and chats with your colleagues? It’s an important element of being in a long term team.
I work in a hospital in a busy face to face job but some colleagues I barely see as we have different weekly rosters. So I only interact with them via email or video call; despite being in the same building a lot of the time. We make the time once a month to have a team meeting and social catch up as it’s good for everyone and the team. It’s similar to what you’re doing once a year across a country.
You may not see the value in it but it may be worth noting other people may see the value in getting to know you and understand you. For example if that socialisation isn’t something that comes natural to you, your team members seeing you and getting to know you will also help them adjust to work better with you. It is very much a 2 way thing.
Pretty ableist to assume everyone wants that though. Like I’m autistic and I do way better with video calls and emails than in person.
Did you not read the last paragraph, where they mentioned that it might not have value for OP directly, but their coworkers see value in it anyway?
Pretty ableist to force someone into a situation that makes them uncomfortable just because you assume everyone enjoys it.
Where in the post does it say anyone is being forced into it? OP was asking why their team wanted to meet up face to face, the first reply explains why teams would want to do it, while acknowledging that not everyone wants to.
I got to say, this is only true if interaction is actually better in person. For me I’m not sure that is the case. I also do not participate in all social calls that my company set up, but I am always available for 1v1 video calls with my colleagues.
I was at the office 3 times last year and that is plenty enough for me and my team.
If I only ever have to see my team once a year, I take it as a win, fake it til I make it, pretend it’s amazing for flatter my boss and team.
Everyone would think I’m an asshole if I wasn’t positive and polite about the one whole day we are forced to eat fucking bagels together.
Some people need to be around others, some people hate it, some people are indifferent. Everyone is different.
I find social interactions very draining. While others find being isolated draining.
I think we are likely in the minority but that doesn’t make us weird. No one is normal.
Social interactions are totally draining for me, but I cannot understand a person until I had a face to face communication with them.
Thanks for posting that. I find social interactions pretty draining as well, and default to email or chat whenever possible, but your post made it click in my head that even a quick video call with a new (or old!) colleague makes later communications feel so much easier.
Same here. I am introverted and I hate social interactions. It drains me. BUT for me, after talking and meeting a person face-to-face a few times, all the rest of the online communication becomes a lot more smooth-sailing.
Not to say that being in an office is better for everyone, and I think people should be able to freely choose a working style that fits them best. There are a few benefits of in person meetings and gathering, here are some I thought of.
A: To make sure You didn’t outsource work assigned to you to someone in a foreign country for a fraction of your salary.
B: To bring up the whole team in one place to look at something, and/or socialize in a way you just can’t over a virtual call.
C: To cross-communicate between departments more, and proactively avoid silos of information on multidisciplinary projects.
D: Meetings and calls can feel more transactional when done virtually than in person, there’s less ability to talk about other stuff besides a brief bit of small talk at the beginning or end.
E: Extroverted people feel lonely with prolonged work from home just as much as introverted people get tired out from being around others for long.
F: A manager needs to get more than just a verbal answer on something. Someone can easily just say “yeah yeah everything’s fine”, but there’s stuff with unspoken body language that can be gauged much better in an in-person conversation.
You’re not being weird. Some people like face to face, some don’t. Not everybody’s the same and to claim that would be naive. Unfortunately, there are more people who enjoy face to face than not, and most of them work in management: management is interacting with people --> you have to like interacting with people to be at least a passable manager --> the chances are much higher you enjoy doing that face to face --> management makes decisions --> face to face is valued.
Same goes for salary: management is there to delegate work --> they are disconnected with the day to day of workers because they don’t do their work --> management sees workers as less qualified than themselves --> logically never would pay those “less qualified” same or more than themselves. Management makes decisions so guess who gets paid more…
It’s just how things shake out. If workers become management, they too forget how things are and slip into the same pattern observed above. It’s just unfortunate how the human brain works.
I worked on remote and an office teams and I think that the asynchronous remote workflow can be more efficient and more easily measured. there’s a paper trail for every conversation that happens. But you also enabled dickheads that don’t like to work. ive worked with these too. it’s complicated to fire these people in some countries.
Weird ai comment, great
