Beating things up in hopes it works. Its weird how often it worked
People who say violence never solved anything have never really been intimate with a printer
Worked on my cars dragging brakes the other day. I need to service them…
Told someone to take their headset off their keyboard when help application kept appearing on their screen.
I can’t say I’ve never been confused by keystrokes from objects laying on my keyboard, but I do usually figure it out within a couple of seconds at most.
I had to get someone to find a wireless keyboard they left in a random box because they never used it, yet they still connected the USB receiver for it.
Removed the plastic film on a brand new phone when someone complained that the earpiece sounded bad during calls
chmod -R 777 *You fucking heathen
😊 this is how you take your Linux security and make it Windows
Great idea!
I once had to tell a colleague that her breasts were pressing the space bar when she put an invoice in her processed tray. I don’t know about dumb but it was embarrassing.
Had a coworker who kept complaining anytime she’d open any dialog boxes they immediately closed. Turns out she had a binder sitting on the edge of her keyboard right on the escape key.
How did she take it?
She was also quite embarrassed. As a fix, we moved her keyboard a few inches.
Hard.
My electric piano requires a very accurate punch in order to the A3 key to work again, I’ve even read in forums that is the ONLY WAY to fix it. Sounded dumb at the time but it was the fix.
Sounds like sorcery.
Bruce Lee, Archmage!
Around 2013-2014ish when the fake FBI viruses when commen, I worked at a tech help desk at my university fixing student computers.
We didn’t have a bootable virus scan avaliable but I discovered it you ctrl-alt-deleted you could tell the system to log out, it would close everything and log out.
but if during a split second when the device was turning on before the virus blocked the screen and actions you opened a word doc or something,
then when you logged out it would close everything (including the virus’s window that was blocking the screen) but the word doc and ask if you wanted to save the document first. By hitting cancel it would stop the logout completely and we could run the various virus scans to get rid of it.
This reminds me of way back when i beat a virus with task manager.
This one was showing as a process in task manager. If you killed it, it would just reappear moments later. I even tried finding the folder it was installing on my pc via rightclick on the program in task manager and clicking “open file location” closing the program and deleting its install folder. But it would still come back, installed somewhere else.
After some time messing around, i noticed that another program would show in the task manager, then the virus would appear, and then the other program would close and disappear from the task manager. All within about 1 or 2 seconds
So i killed the task, waited for the other program to appear right click it fast, open file location, and there it was, a different folder with a program that auto runs when the virus is removed to reinstall the virus and close itself to avoid detection.
I deleted that folder and then killed the virus program in the task manager, and it didn’t reappear. I had won!
I seem to recall it was resistent to virus scanners for this reason.
But this was about 20 years ago so i doubt there are viruses that unsophisticated now.
I had something similar. I was looking at my processes one day for some reason, when I noticed CuteFTP. Now, I knew what it was, but I knew for a fact that I hadn’t installed it. Some investigation led to a hidden folder containing some scripts. One of them was for remote control via an IRC channel. So I hopped in the channel and had a chat with the user who was set to admin the bot on my computer.
Edit: Formatting.
Yeah around the same time as those fbi ones there were ones like that but they generated new ones with randomized names trying to hide. I think
Fucking baller status. There were a couple of fixes, not as complex as yours of course, that I figured out during the wild west of internet and virus infection. Can’t remember any of it in detail, but yeah, shit was it’s own kind of puzzle and was awesome to find a fix like this.
I wanted to install an extra hard drive in my computer, but the power supply didn’t have enough connectors. I actually had a spare power supply unit, but upon testing, the 24 pin cable was too short to reach the motherboard.
I ended up using both PSUs. Only one had a power switch on it, so that was connected to the hard drives. I had to use a paperclip in the unused 24 pin connector to make it output power. The 2 PSUs had a wire running between the ground pins of a random unused connector, and they were on the same phase circuit.
The hard drive PSU had to be turned on first at the switch. Once that was on, I could press the power button to turn on the computer. I think I used it for about a year before buying enough upgrade parts to effectively replace the entire computer.
My coworker was frustrated that his laptop kept shutting down randomly, going to sleep while he was typing. I looked at his wrists and asked if he was wearing magnetic bracelet, which was 100% the cause. Laptop has magnet sensors to detect the lid was closing, so it went to sleep. His destress (/s) tool became the source of considerable stress until I figured that out
I’m not sure if this counts because it wasn’t intentional on my part, but… When I was a kid, my mom had a digital camera. The lense on it would extend when it was powered on, and then retract when it was powered off.
At some point the lense got stuck, which caused the camera to not turn on properly and made it useless so she ended up getting a new one. I had gone to take the old/broken one to mess around with it and accidentally dropped it.
Apparently the angle that it fell at was just enough to “lodge” the lense back into place yet the fall wasn’t high enough to cause it to shatter or break. It worked perfectly after that, and while my parents were a bit upset they needlessly bought a new camera, they ended up letting me keep the old one.
(Later on I figured that was their way of justifying not returning the new camera that probably had nice new features or something)
I also vaguely remembering them saying something along the lines of “That’s probably the only time in your life dropping a piece of equipment will actually fix it and was just luck - don’t go trying that on other things randomly”.
A long, long time ago, at a helpdesk far, far away I “revived” a couple hard drives with a short drop. Never actually fixed them, but it’s gotten a few to spin just long enough to retrieve some important emails or documents.
I wouldn’t recommend it, but sometimes you just gotta persuade stuff…
I’m a web applications developer…. So a lot. But here’s the king of dumb shit fixes I’ve done. Back in the days off VGA a few friends and I met up with some other dudes for a counter strike LAN party. Everyone’s hauling their towers in and if you were lucky, your heavy as fuck 17” CRT. So I set up and my monitor won’t work. Has power, no signal. Switch from the gpu vga port to the integrated one and it works. Switch back to gpu and it works as long as I hold it in a weird position. So it’s all fine, just the connection is massive wearing out. For some reason I figure a little moisture will help so I lick the vga plug, reattach it and it totally solved the problem.
So yeah, I licked a gpu into working again.
Kinky
When I moved recently my PC suddenly stopped booting.
Before transport I removed the GPU so the PCB wouldn’t crack, but my motherboard was showing that it got stuck in the GPU check when booting, so I thought I accidentally broke the GPU by shocking it with static, or popping off some capacitor or something. I still wanted to rule out everything else before buying a new GPU though.
I kept replugging things, thinking it might be a connection that came loose during transport, I reseated the RAM, I tried just one RAM stick, I even reseated the CPU.
Turns out, somehow a CMOS reset fixed it. I’m still confused as to why that worked.
EHCI (system config) data was corrupt. Possibly from pulling the GPU while the motherboard board still had power (or residual power in caps).
CMOS wipe resets to blank and that data gets rewritten after BIOS runs the “wtf is plugged into me” routines triggered by blank data.
That’d be my guess.
I wasn’t aware that data could be corrupted by unplugging components, but what you’re saying is making sense. That could definitely have been it.
“Weird Shit” is always a possibility when there’s any power at all in the system. The PSU will keep low level power supplied for a surprisingly long time after being unplugged from the mains. 💛
Is it true that this power gets drained when you press the power button without the power cord plugged in?
Not in my experience.
Smacked the shit out of our old CRT TV, worked!
That’s where the phrase “out of whack” came from. You just needed to give it a whack.
Lots of percussive maintenance going on around here, but one that sticks in my mind was testing some of the first 486DX PCs in 1990. One particular specimen from Compaq would only boot after hard power off by taking the lid off and tapping the CPU with a screwdriver. Worked fine after that.
Shorted the center pin of a transistor in the numerical display of one of those giant build a stack game at Dave and busters. Literally the first thing they had me look at after starting, and that that no one could figure out, I was testing various points with a multi meter when it slipped and bridge two of the legs. At first I was worried a really messed something up, but the dude that had been there forever was like “what’d you do‽ It’s working!”. Definitely a fix I wasn’t expecting.
