While husband abuse does happen, it is less statistically common and statistically it’s more common for males to overpower and beat females. Google search is a system based of statistics, so that’s why there is a discrepancy
We should totally give more of a voice to males who have experienced abuse and trauma, but complaining like this doesn’t help the cause imo
Sorry but this is exactly what really rubs my gears about this topic. Whenever there’s something like this or a man trying to post about his abuse there’s always someone, mostly women, who try to shut them up & argue about domestic abuse towards women. It’s as if that somehow excuses it, or makes it not as important when it it is being done to men.
I also want to remind you that men are much less likely to actually report, or let alone even talk about domestic abuse done to them. A lot of domestic abuse done by women, such as slapping or various verbal abuse (insults, yelling, manipulation, gaslighting etc), are also often not even seen as abusive, but rather as the norm within our society. This causes statistics to be inherently flawed.
Either way though… “Who does it the most” is not actually any sort of valid argument AGAINST proper & equal help line texts in a search engine, or equal laws, or equal societal norms & standards. You generally shouldn’t demand to be treated equal but then punch in the other direction whenever it suits you. That’s now how that works and just makes you look like a hypocrite.
The worst part is that feminists keep saying that we don’t need MRAs because feminism will make everything right. Except you know, when men has an issue, like this thread shows.
Domestic violence, by count of occurrences, has been shown to be around 50/50, with a slight lean towards women instigating slightly more often.
This is not taking into account how hard the partner hits or how much damage they cause, but women do aggress on men about the same as the other way around.
Your statementade me google the statistics and reports for my country (Germany) and i found a credible source that says that up to 40% of victims of relationship-violence are men and that the numbers might be even higher as men dont talk aboit this, its a “taboo” cause men need to be tough and all.
Just sharing my source, maybe you have one too? Would be interested to read more into this.
Yep, like the suicide gap that will often come up, MRAs will talk up how men commit suicide at 5 times the rate of women, but quietly not mention the part where it’s not for lack of trying, women will more often choose less violent means that are easier to be saved from, meaning that despite actually attempting far more than men, they are rescued or are able to back out of it much more often.
On that point, women and men engage in abuse patterns differently, which is why society has had trouble recognizing women abusers and their victims. Instead of battering them or choking them, they’ll call the cops on them or pursue them with a knife or threaten their loved ones or treasured possessions or even pets.
Victims of male abusers come out often fearing for their physical safety and mistrusting other men, victims of female abusers will come out fearing for their safety but mistrusting society at large because abusive women will often make the levers of society their weapon instead of the more blunt instruments abusive men tend to use.
It’s a double standard. Every study that looks at instances of domestic violence finds victims are about 50/50 in gender. Resources only really exist for women though.
Not really, gender specific resources really only exist for women, and that’s more because men being traumatized to the point of fearing the presence of women at all is much less spoken of than the reverse, especially with the more subtle way in which women tend to engage in such abuse, a lot of the times including involving the law or other authority figures in “defending them” from their “aggressive” spouse.
Female victims develop fears of an opposing gender, while male victims will develop fears of society writ large.
To that end though, there are resources available to men, just not as many gender segregated resources for them.
Of the estimated 4,970 female victims of murder and nonnegligent manslaughter in 2021, data reported by law enforcement agencies indicate that 34% were killed by an intimate partner (figure 1). By comparison, about 6% of the 17,970 males murdered that year were victims of intimate partner homicide.
Are you saying we should not help someone out if an abusive relationship unless they’re at danger of being murdered? Because that’s what I’m getting from this.
Abuse victims deserve support, regardless if their gender or risk of physical harm.
While husband abuse does happen, it is less statistically common and statistically it’s more common for males to overpower and beat females. Google search is a system based of statistics, so that’s why there is a discrepancy
We should totally give more of a voice to males who have experienced abuse and trauma, but complaining like this doesn’t help the cause imo
Sorry but this is exactly what really rubs my gears about this topic. Whenever there’s something like this or a man trying to post about his abuse there’s always someone, mostly women, who try to shut them up & argue about domestic abuse towards women. It’s as if that somehow excuses it, or makes it not as important when it it is being done to men.
I also want to remind you that men are much less likely to actually report, or let alone even talk about domestic abuse done to them. A lot of domestic abuse done by women, such as slapping or various verbal abuse (insults, yelling, manipulation, gaslighting etc), are also often not even seen as abusive, but rather as the norm within our society. This causes statistics to be inherently flawed.
Either way though… “Who does it the most” is not actually any sort of valid argument AGAINST proper & equal help line texts in a search engine, or equal laws, or equal societal norms & standards. You generally shouldn’t demand to be treated equal but then punch in the other direction whenever it suits you. That’s now how that works and just makes you look like a hypocrite.
The worst part is that feminists keep saying that we don’t need MRAs because feminism will make everything right. Except you know, when men has an issue, like this thread shows.
MRA groups are inherently incel infested cesspools.
Are you reading this very thread?
You’ve just proven my point.
Yeah and?
Feminists all over this thread are saying we cant focus on a problem men have
That hasn’t happened at all.
Yes they have, in this very thread!
Domestic violence, by count of occurrences, has been shown to be around 50/50, with a slight lean towards women instigating slightly more often.
This is not taking into account how hard the partner hits or how much damage they cause, but women do aggress on men about the same as the other way around.
Your statementade me google the statistics and reports for my country (Germany) and i found a credible source that says that up to 40% of victims of relationship-violence are men and that the numbers might be even higher as men dont talk aboit this, its a “taboo” cause men need to be tough and all.
Just sharing my source, maybe you have one too? Would be interested to read more into this.
https://www.aerzteblatt.de/archiv/186686/Haeusliche-Gewalt-gegen-Maenner-Unbeachtet-und-tabuisiert
Yep, like the suicide gap that will often come up, MRAs will talk up how men commit suicide at 5 times the rate of women, but quietly not mention the part where it’s not for lack of trying, women will more often choose less violent means that are easier to be saved from, meaning that despite actually attempting far more than men, they are rescued or are able to back out of it much more often.
On that point, women and men engage in abuse patterns differently, which is why society has had trouble recognizing women abusers and their victims. Instead of battering them or choking them, they’ll call the cops on them or pursue them with a knife or threaten their loved ones or treasured possessions or even pets.
Victims of male abusers come out often fearing for their physical safety and mistrusting other men, victims of female abusers will come out fearing for their safety but mistrusting society at large because abusive women will often make the levers of society their weapon instead of the more blunt instruments abusive men tend to use.
Seems to have started a conversation…
Awareness of the double standard is exactly how it will get fixed. No need to be defeatist.
But is it actually a double standard or a mirage? Its entirely possible for different responses to be justified given different underlying conditions.
It’s a double standard. Every study that looks at instances of domestic violence finds victims are about 50/50 in gender. Resources only really exist for women though.
Not really, gender specific resources really only exist for women, and that’s more because men being traumatized to the point of fearing the presence of women at all is much less spoken of than the reverse, especially with the more subtle way in which women tend to engage in such abuse, a lot of the times including involving the law or other authority figures in “defending them” from their “aggressive” spouse.
Female victims develop fears of an opposing gender, while male victims will develop fears of society writ large.
To that end though, there are resources available to men, just not as many gender segregated resources for them.
Of the estimated 4,970 female victims of murder and nonnegligent manslaughter in 2021, data reported by law enforcement agencies indicate that 34% were killed by an intimate partner (figure 1). By comparison, about 6% of the 17,970 males murdered that year were victims of intimate partner homicide.
It might be 50/50 but it’s not equal.
https://bjs.ojp.gov/female-murder-victims-and-victim-offender-relationship-2021
Are you saying we should not help someone out if an abusive relationship unless they’re at danger of being murdered? Because that’s what I’m getting from this.
Abuse victims deserve support, regardless if their gender or risk of physical harm.
Hmmm interesting perspective. I’ll think on my stance for a while
This place definitely isn’t reddit and this comment proves it lol
@candywashing “While husband abuse does happen, it is less statistically common”
Not according to the CDC’s studies, or honestly almost every other study about the issue.
@Dble