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I just stopped talking to them or responding well to their efforts. It’s a trend. I really couldn’t even tell you why with any absolute certainty, aside from the following thought that’s come up when trying to figure it out.
If you grow up in a situation where your parents move every couple of years for work, IMO you’re going to develop in one of two ways:
-you’re going to get really good at making new friends, real fast, and keeping in touch with people over time
-you’ll reach a point where you stop putting any effort into connecting with new people or keeping in touch with old friends, because what’s the point? You’ll be gone soon anyway.And if you’re in the latter camp, unless you put real effort into fixing it, that shit can stick with you long after the situation creating that condition is over.
I’ve made some progress, I suppose, in trying to at least be a friendly guy on the street open to chance encounters that theoretically could turn into a more robust friendship, but I’ve got a ways to go to get where I’d like to be re: that.
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Yes, I’ve never heard of anyone making a friend past 30. Impossible!
Lost (sent away) two who tried to ‘date’ my husband.
Mad she didn’t get invited to a concert my GF bought tickets to. Welp
I mean, if my friends knew I was a huge fan of the band, were going and weren’t like, “tickets are £50, do you want one?” It would sting.
I wasn’t planning on it, my GF bought the tickets without asking me about it, and didn’t know about my pal being into the band. But my friend figured I was the one who left her out. Plus, not everyone gets invited to everything, hey I’m dating someone here. Called me up and berated me about being a bad friend without saying what it was she was mad about. I prefer not to have friends that use that kind of rhetoric.
Thats a specific situation you’re imagining and isnt necessarily what happened
I did realise that it’s a specific situation but as the original post didn’t have more context, I didn’t see why I shouldn’t be allowed to suggest some.
If OP wants to expand on the situation, they’re welcome to.
Whenever I wanted to hang out she was at volleyball practice
I forgor 💀
Hop yo remem!
This is ages ago, invited me to an MLM event without telling me it’s MLM. I’ve experienced cult that night.
This hits close to home…
I had someone do that with me too, but in their defense, I know they never had the brains to tell that was a cult. Fortunately they didn’t get trapped either, but they did waste a bit of money in it for a short while.
Friends; plural. I quit drinking.
A drinking buddy of mine quit. I got good at making mocktails. Bonus now when I want a cocktail but not booze I can have a nice drink.
Eastern countries don’t build all their communal events around booze but instead food. One of the many reasons I have no interest in moving back to the West.
Sounds like a smart way.
neglect
Brother: Lets just say we had a major disagreement in early November.
No nut November can really split families apart
Couldn’t agree what stash you’d each grow for Movember? :D /s
Or they couldn’t agree if almonds or pistachios were the best nut.
Pistachios, because almonds aren’t actually nuts. They’re drupes
Pistachios aren’t actually nuts. They’re drupes
Oh shit, you’re right! I had no idea, good catch.
RIP friendship 😔
My best friend and I suggested online that maybe this friend of ours stop using “gay” as an insult (this was around 2009 or so) and he and his girlfriend became adamantly defensive and mean. When they implied that my best friend was molesting his beloved dog just to be assholes, I just cut the cord and walked away. They were idiots anyway.
Fun fact: the girlfriend was, and is, a huge “do good” volunteer advocacy leader. So, you know, help each other out, but don’t get in the way of my homophobic slurs.
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So, so many people refuse to believe they’re even capable of being wrong.
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And half the country. 😩
Back in primary school (end of 1997), my best friend went to a different high school the next year and we never spoke again.
He had an argument with my then girlfriend, and stopped talking to me for some reason. We never had any issues or arguments, but he simply won’t reply to me or return my calls. After a while, I gave up. We had been friends for about 7 years at that point.
I canceled on the biweekly DnD session because it was scheduled for Halloween and I had plans. Told him a little last minute (day before when I realized).
Dude torpedoed our 10 year friendship over that.
Agree with other responder. End of October was… Stressful. Way more for some than others. This might be one of those situations where trying an “Are you OK?” would be all that’s needed to start mending.
2023
Was that this year? Halloween wasn’t too long ago, maybe he was in a bad mood/unstable situation. You may recover if he reconsiders, it feels a bit extreme to burn a decade old bridge just because of that
Last year.
Could it be the last straw?
Not really? It was his first time DMing. He was doing a homebrew story. Actually Foundry, not DnD. It was my first time playing and I was really struggling with it. I wasn’t a fan of where the party was taking it and each session was basically wandering aimlessly through a cave and repeating my only attack (sling a rock) at whatever monsters we found. I let him know that I wasn’t enjoying it and there wasn’t a lot for my character to do and he just linked me to the rules website.
I asked for advice on Lemmy, and they suggested I ask for like a 15 minute out of character period at the start of next session to express what our goals were in the game. That was scheduled for the session that I ultimately bailed on.
I got a long string of texts the next morning about how I don’t respect him and never respected him and a lot of other shit. I dunno.
It seems that in the past he felt bad about something you did to him, he give you another chance and you did the thing about cancelling at the last moment. So the real issue was the previous one, nor the latter (the one you said at the beginning)
Sorry for my english.
If he was, he made no effort to tell me what that was, so that’s on him.
Yes, it seems so.
I relfected my own insecurities about my sexuality onto my partner, sadly i didnt realised that they where nonbinary :(
It certainly wasnt the final nail in the coffin but something i still feel guilty about.
Wait, I hope you don’t think it’s your fault that you opened up?
It sounds like they mean that they projected their insecurities onto their partner, as opposed to just sharing the insecurity. The latter is good and healthy, the former is unpleasant at best and harmful at worst.
