cross-posted from: https://hexbear.net/post/3669136
Dick pics or it didn’t happen!
"Not looking, not looking at your penis at all. " … “So sorry about your penis.” [Little Britain]
My pp information is public, Im not hiding anything - what are you people hiding??
real shit, these things are mechanical turks. they really are cameras that are live streaming to centers in third world countries. when the poorly paid operator sees you’re done, he sends the flush signal to the toilet. if you’ve ever been in a bathroom where the “sensor is broken” and it seems to flush at random, it’s because they just keep flushing it periodically if they can’t get a visual. real truth
We were just training AI flushers this whole time?
Jokes on them. They’re gonna need a longer lens.
(awkwardly long zooming noises)
All is fine, but I’m still curious: how many do you have?
at least one. at most nine.
34x28x16 @ 400 p.s.i. is that enough information for you?
At 400 pixels per square inch, 34x28x16 isn’t measurements I would have shared on lemmy.
Sorry, but no, you forgot duration it took to void, stream color, taste, smell, accuracy, flow consistency, body hair grooming, presence and degree of curvature, and overall hygiene. We’ve got ahead and shared your supplied data with our 1869 advertising and heathcare partners. Thank you for opting in! We will continue to collect data at all of our established locations and now through your personal cell phone! Have a nice day!
400 psi? Damn you could piss the paint off your house with that thing
ooo so that’s why they never seem to work, makes so much sense now! /j
Genuinely though, it would not surprise anymore. We have subscription based cars selling your info to insurance companies, retroactively ammended purchase experiences everywhere, and every dang app and website harvesting as much info on you as physically possible no matter how mundane.
Dick info reporting toilets would not at all catch me by surprise at this point.
Dick info reporting seems pointless but they can add an advert screen above the urinal (which is sadly becoming common) and track your eye movement to record engagement rates.
It’s just an auto flusher…
Yes I’m aware. I’m saying that IF it were an actual thing, it would not be surprising at all considering the extent of invasive, non-consentual data collection and selling that happens all over the place these days.
You’re right, yes, in many ways, but yet also very, very wrong.
That’s why I invest in wireless, RFID resistant, anti-flash dick screening devices. Wake up sheeple!
But does it need to be tamper proof as well?
Its not just tamper proof, it’s future proof!
One day they’ll want to manually inspect your cock before getting on a plane.
Well I’m sorry Mr. TSA, my WMD is none of your business.
Jokes on them, my dick information is already all over the web!
this is why I exclusively pee in the dumpster being dairy queen
I find the Whataburger dumpsters are more roomy
Why is the dumpster being dairy queen?
Dumpster is obviously a dairy king.
Don’t fast food restaurants usually have a camera pointed at their dumpster? XD
A real man would do it in the trash can inside the dairy queen
I pee on the dairy queen (with consent of course)
good thing I’m not a man
Sorry, I shouldn’t have assumed
It was full
Good luck, I encrypted my dick data.
They just forgot the cookie banner
What does matter is length times diameter plus weight over girth divided by angle of the tip squared.
I have so many questions. Are you measuring angle from the vertical or the horizontal? Whereabouts should I be placing the ruler for that tangent? Are we using metric or imperial units? If metric, is it square centimetres or kilograms per cm, and if it’s imperial, is it square inches or ounces per inch per square degree?