Hi all!
We’re very excited to move to Denmark soon as lifelong Americans. I have a good job lined up, and we’re set on a place to live for a while.
Any advice from people who have done it, looked it up, had friends who have done it, etc? Just in general :)
Do everything you can to learn the language quickly. Take any language class offer you get. It will make life much easier in a new country, especially if you’re looking to make friends. Immerse yourself in the culture immediately.
Also, remember that Europeans, especially Scandinavians, are not as openly friendly as Americans. They can seem cold and distant at first. It’s not because they are not friendly, it’s just a cultural feature. Once you get to know them, most open up and they are awesome.
Remember, they’re called just pastries over there.
What’s called pastries though.
Danish pastries…
I don’t have any advice, but there is something I can say. Next generation UE, investigate it
Why?
Do your best to immerse yourself . When you view the USA from the outside or return to visit, you will ask yourself, “WTF is going on here?”
I’m in it asking this.
Buy fancy feast and put in on some toast. Now you know what danish food is like.
In the middle now.
Wife is already Swedish so I’m doing it on easy mode, plus job is remote.
Politeness, wow, that’s tough to get used to. Trying to fix my silicon valley manners and I’m still coming off as the biggest asshole.
Government is more involved in your life, but it’s not too bad, just something you get used to, ups and downs, they mostly try to help.
Amazon is shit, thats a thing for me, but you manage.
They have a food culture.
No, you may have misunderstood me, I did not say they have food in their culture, I mean a significant part of their societal culture revolves around food.
Did not understand this, used to Door dashing and eating to get by, they don’t do that, food matters to them, spending half a day cooking is just a thing you do, it’s not work to them anymore than watching YouTube is.
Otherwise you’ll get by, just try to tone down your socialization reflexes, they’re more reserved and our outgoing nature can scare them shitless if they’re not ready for it.
Don’t walk in the bike path.
4th. of July is celebrated in Rebild, which could be a nice excuse to drive through the country and meet other Americans in Denmark.
Just dont pull a gun when some gets unauthorized on your property.
Dane here, living in the UK but have lived in the US and spent a lot of time with Americans.
First of all make sure your are looking at Forskerordningen, which can radically lower your tax burden as a foreign worker coming to Denmark.
Second, binge watch YouTube - there’s a lot of content of Americans moving to Denmark and most of them are full of advice. Travelin’ Young is the most nuanced.
It’s very easy to navigate stores and big cities with English. Do not let that fool you. Danes REALLY appreciate arrivals learning the language and there are many places where not knowing the language will really impact you. Also, language is culture and it’s too easy in Denmark to fool yourself into thinking it’s not a problem for you. You won’t really live there and make those connections without speaking the language. Learn the language; I cannot say this clearly enough. It’ll make an ENORMOUS difference to you.
Danes are very direct compared to Americans. Especially in the work place. They find Americans phoney and saccharine and they do not like corporate lingo. Speak plainly, be clear, feel a little “rude” (as an American) and you’ll quickly zero in on the right level of directness. It will be extremely difficult for you, as an American, to not read Danes as bored or rude. They are just plain.
Be advised that “provinsen” (the outskirts) is quiet, dull, won’t speak English and very bare. If you’re not living in a big city, be prepared for an uphill climb. On the upside, though, if you built relationships out there, they’ll last a lifetime.
If you want to be fully “adopted”, be advised that alcohol is part of the culture. Most events include alcohol. Sobriety isn’t normal.
If you have kids, steel yourself for the liberty danes afford their children - and expect others to give them too. Kids will roam and being exposed to risk is seen as healthy part of growing up, including in state schools.
Janteloven is real. If you’re ambitious, be strategic about how you expose that to others.
That is indeed quite accurate and comprehensive.
And as a Dane due to move back after 8 years abroad it feels strangely relevant and slightly alienating 🙃
I don’t know if Denmark does it, but Norwegians love to use week numbers in corporate/education environments for scheduling instead of using dates like normal people, so you might end up in a situation where you have to check the calender to find out what date Monday week 42 might be.
… and once you’re used to it, you’ll realise how much easier that is :)
I’ve lived almost my entire life in Norway, and I don’t think it’s much easier than saying a date
- Language is by far the most important door opener, so put in one hour of learning every day for at least a year.
- Mingle to get out of your comfort zone: Go to after-work parties and flea markets, take public transit. Use hobbyist/ meet-up apps. Read/ watch the local news.
- Don’t expect to be invited, especially not to people’s homes. People might also be uncomfortable being invited to your home. Meeting in a public place is almost always the better option, unless you’ve gotten to know someone really well.
- Irony/ sarcasm don’t translate very well between cultures.
- Europe has some lousy weather, so get watertight coats and waterproof your shoes and backpacks.
- Take it slow.
- Also: Enjoy it! Europe is a fantastic little place at the crossroads between Asia and Africa and I would never want to leave.
UK inhabitant here. Is being invited to someone’s house a casual thing in the US? I don’t think I’ve ever been invited by someone who isn’t a close friend.
I lived in Italy and Germany and it does happen here. Mostly with friends you already know reasonably well though.
Greece here, we invite people to our homes all the time, even if we don’t know them very well.
All of this sounds so exciting. Thanks for the reply.
I’m so, so sorry. Also, if Trump is reelected, FLEE.
We’re moving away from the US, did you misread that or are you suggesting we should flee further than Europe?
Create a second gmail account when you get there. Many apps that you will need there don’t exist in the US app/playstore, so you will need the second account to download them.
All round great advice. For a bit more silly one: record yourself opening the window for the first time in Denmark.
(iykyk)
- learn the language AND CUSTOMS
- don’t hang out in foreigner/english bubbles
- don’t assume anything works the way it does in the US (from gasoline and driving to medical to government). There are lots of little things that seem like they obviously must be done X way but aren’t in other countries
- be careful with any investments. It’s very easy to end up with PFICs which are punitively taxed (making retirement vehicles here in Japan outside of the national pension prohibitive for me, for instance).
- celebrate
- bring any snacks that you can legally bring but they can’t legally sell (some things with food dyes, etc. if you really like them are banned in some countries to produce/sell but not eat).
I got to disagree with the “learn the language and customs” thing. I live (also born and raised) in one of the most culturally diverse cities in America: Germantown, Maryland. I couldn’t be prouder, and I also couldn’t care less if you don’t speak English.
Be yourself. You are welcome here.
This is the absolute worst advice for coming to a European country. It’s probably different in Denmark but for some countries or cities at least you won’t be able to get through the bureaucracy needed to legally immigrate without speaking the language. Even in offices that mainly help foreigners you may find the employees don’t speak English. And if you want to be there long-term, good luck making real connections if you don’t speak the language.
That probably depends on the country, but I don’t think you should omit learning language, even as English native, even if everyone around you speak your native one.
I’ve seen that several times already in Poland. Been around a guy from India who was practically monolingual English speaker (his local language is fading away, he should technically still speak it due to his grandparents, but doesn’t or speaks very little) and he straight up refused to learn Polish because he „seen no value” in it, it’s not an easy language to learn and he’d rather just put that time and effort into a MMO game. He only attended lessons to learn to pass an exam that will allow him staying in the country, with no intention to actually learn how to speak. Poles are quite often excited to speak English with somebody as everyone knows importance of it and wants to practice IRL. Everyone around him, like his gf, her family, coworkers in corpo, accept that and they all speak English well, so no obligation on his side. He only knows how to tell cashier that he’ll pay with a debit card and it takes a single word. Well, that’s his choice you can say, but then it was pretty annoying at times to have him around. Imagine standing in a circle joking around and every two sentences that guy asks „What? What did he/she say?”, and someone attempts to translate it to English, but the joke doesn’t work or is not understandable even after translating because it refers to something else in the language, culture, memes, slang etc. Either learn it or expect to be disconnected and excluded at times. That’s all good to tolerate newcomers who don’t yet know much about the culture and language, but it doesn’t look very good to me if that’s a guy who lives here for 8 years and doesn’t have plans moving away anytime soon.
The EU isn’t the US.
Most countries in Europe have this idea of integration where the foreigner learns and adopts the language and culture of the country. You’ll see lots of discussions of “failed” integration of foreigners, especially in Germany.
I think this is still a type of colonialism where they think there culture is better and the foreigner must change, rather than the other way around.
I think the US is a bit better in this regard as there is this idea of a cultural mixing pot and foreigners aren’t expected to “integrate”.
White people moving across the world, imposing their language and culture, is a “cultural mixing pot” ? Did you play a uno reverse card lol
It’s not colonialism to prefer one culture (or certain cultural traits) to another. In fact, it’s natural.
I’ve lived in a number of countries and each had their own distinct cultural norms. Each has had aspects which I perceived as either positive or negative.
Add it all together and I definitely have preferred certain cultures, not because they are “better” but because they more closely match my own preferences. Other people would prefer different cultural norms.
The integration part is because we would like for anyone to fit in, and not be confined to your ‘hood’
We don’t mind you not speaking the language, but English is usually not a first language, sometimes not even a second, and sometimes omitted. Especially in rural areas.
So yeah, it’s nice if we can actually have a conversation about the local soccer team, or town buffoon who thinks the government is conspiring about pricing covid shots too high…
It’s not just communicating, it’s also stuff for general living, like recognizing road signs, paying bills, dealing with government paperwork, ordering food in restaurants, etc. They won’t always have an English translation beside it, nor do they have an obligation to have it. Same goes for people too.
Say for example, a Japanese just showed up in your hometown, knowing not a lick of English, and planning to live here long term. I’m sure people in your hometown are more than willing to help, but how much stuff in your general life is in English? Surely you can’t expect someone to be able to help them around 24/7, and with a language barrier too.
You gotta know that not everything is going to accommodate for you in foreign places. OP might be able to do well enough since people in Denmark probably speak English well in general. But if you want to truly know the people, their culture, or even form deep connections with some, you have to do some work, and language is a first big step.
