I just got out of a 10+ year relationship a couple months ago, rather suddenly and not of my own volition. I do not fault my former partner, she did what she felt she had to do to be happy. Unfortunately, turns out, I didn’t really have any friends of my own, I was just a hanger-on to her group. I have done a bad job of keeping in touch with anyone outside of this group, and I find myself very lonely nowadays.
Things have been tough for me for this and several other reasons the last couple years, and while I am incredibly thankful for my family taking me back in and supporting me while I get back on my feet, they can’t be the only people I interact with. That said, how does one actually accomplish this? I’m pushing 40, I live in a rural area (30 minute drive to anything that isn’t run and populated by out-and-out racists), and I’m broke as hell. I’m not particularly even interested in dating, just making some new friends and not being so lonely all the time. Where can you go and what can you do nowadays that doesn’t cost a bunch of money and people are willing to talk to strangers? Internet or IRL, I suppose, but IRL is better because God I need to get out of the house more.
Most of the friends I’ve made after age 22 were people I worked with or people I met through dating apps. We’d go out and decide we didn’t want to date, but we liked each other enough to form friendships. The friend who I’m hanging out with next week is a former coworker. The one I’m slated to hang with after that is also a former coworker. But only two of the jobs yielded good friendships. Other places that I worked I might go to lunch with certain people, but nothing lasting came of it because I had a long commute to work and they lived in that area.
Others already suggested meetup and I know a friend had success with that. Or join hiking groups or amateur sport groups maybe like disk golf? Good luck!