I am hoping to move ASAP and have no idea what I’m doing.
Does anyone have any guidance? I’ve never made much money in my life so I’m nervous about that.
I want to move to the West Coast and know it’s more expensive there. I want to be somewhere LGBT friendly.
I don’t know where to start. When I look for apartments it’s always about …1 or 2 apartments in my price range in an area of hundred of thousands of people.
I’m kind of unsure about looking for a job. I typically suck at interviews and have been the type to prove myself via hard work vs selling myself to an employer. I’m a pretty quiet person and it takes a lot for me to warm up to people and I find this to be a bad trait for employment. Ime it seems social people get picked first regardless of work ethic.
Idk any advice would be great. Like steps to be broken down so I’m not overwhelmed.
I want to avoid areas of crime, and prejudice. I also enjoy people that are down to earth more than what I consider wealth, trend and privilege.
I make about $14.50 right now… lol-fml.
I wish dorm style living was a thing.
Thanks in advance for any info.
Edit: in terms of our of state… I’m thinking Vancouver CA or Toronto. West Coast would probably be Cali, OR or wa.
I’m somewhat open to East Coast south of Maryland.
You like nature, and paddle boarding, and LGBT friendly spaces? Skip the West Coast, come live in the Twin Cities. It’s really nice here, it’s safe, has all the things you’re looking for, and it’s not unfathomably fucking expensive.
The only downside is that winters are cold. Bring a winter jacket.
As others commented, lining up a job is step 1 to any move. That will be be the hard part.
What’s your work experience in? What are the totals for your career? What skills do you need for career you want, are you actively working on developing them?
SoCal resident here. Cost of living is much, much higher than many less-desirable places, so as others have said, it’s absolutely necessary to have a job to move to before moving here.
Also, the WC states are not homogenous. “Red state California/Oregon/Washington” are as red as Tennessee. There’s a big chunk of extreme northern CA that wants to secede. Same with eastern WA/OR.
Coastal communities are, on the whole, not occupied by narrow-minded DeSantis fans, but that’s not an absolute. The more rural a place, the redder it is.
Sites like Coos Bay are fairly cheap by coastal standards, but there aren’t really any jobs around there, and it isn’t exactly West Hollywood for community life and things to do.
My God yeah. It’s not like what fox news says. Really you have the city which leans liberal but is pretty moderate. The rest of the state is just as rural and red as Oklahoma.
The reverse is also true. Larger cities in red states can be very liberal. Nashville, Columbus, Atlanta.
Apparently Bangor maine has a big outdoor backyard, is probably relatively cheaper than other places along the east coast and is supposedly pretty lbgtq friendly.
Although that is not south of Maryland. Nevemind.
I would not move across country without a firm job that can cover your expenses. Especially if you have no social network to support you. This is how lots of people become homeless.
So start there, look at where you can find work, maybe make some phone calls, send emails, etc. Then once you have a sense of how much you’ll be able to make you can look at what housing is available to you. But realistically, surviving in expensive places with the amount of money you currently make may be quite difficult. Keep in mind that many of the very lowest cost apartments you see may be scams.
Also, consider looking at some cities closer to home. There may be some pockets of lgbt friendliness in your region that you aren’t considering and they may be lower cost of living. The places you listed are all extremely expensive and not necessarily somewhere you can just move without a plan.
I know everyone hates Reddit here but once you start to narrow things down, it might be helpful to ask specific questions on local subreddits to get input from locals.
This comment has the best advice. Unless it’s dire need, moving is not in the cards for OP Here.
OP, hard reality check, you do not have the finances to afford a move, let alone living. Take it from me, I live in WA, and even with a decent tech salary it is still incredibly expensive to live here. Hard facts, a cheap apartment in the Seattle area will be over $2,000 a month. We’re talking out of the way, hour commutes into work, it’s a place. Minimum wage is higher here, but not by much. Assume you can get a job at $16/hour that’s 125 hours of work a month dedicated to just rent alone. (Not counting taxes, and of course things like… eating)
Which is, of course, impossible.
To get here alone we spent $8,000 in movers, not counting gas, hotels, and other items to get here. Then if you don’t have work you need several thousand per month for each month you are not working to cover food, rent, etc. I think we spent about $13,000 in total moving across country when it was all said and done.
We also flew out here to see apartments before we moved too, that is also an extra expense, so tack on another 2 grand for flights, hotel, etc.
You need a plan, and not a plan for once you get here but a whole plan. The whole ordeal will be a months long process, and several of those months will be without income. If you are in the spot you claim, then you just simply cannot do it.
I get the drive - the need to move. I grew up in a small town and it was suffocating. It’s not impossible to get out, but it requires a lot more planning then just “I need to move”, which is why I feel for you.
The only steps for now are to start saving. If the drive is real then you’ll be able to save the money. Get a second job. Work overtime. Save every dime to get yourself out. Start building a plan. Working retail out here is possible but it won’t be the dream of moving across country. Maybe look into community college or other ways to learn new skills that would be in demand, that would help move you out because you’d be able to land a job across the country and move for it.
If the drive to move is real, the passion and motivation will be there to accomplish those goals.
Years sounds like an eternity, but if you start today then you can have the realistic goal of “4 years from now I want to be on the West Coast”. That’s accomplish-able. Trust me, I did it, you can too.
Save up. Save save save.
Moving is expensive, and any new job is risky to start. The places you’re looking at are expensive because most sane people want to live there.
If you can find a remote job, start there: once you’re a remote worker, you can establish yourself at the job before you move. Once you’re confident that you like the job and aren’t going to get laid off out of nowhere, you won’t have to stress about paying rent while looking for a job in a new place.
Visit a city before committing, make sure it has the vibe you want. Coastal cities all have their upsides and downsides.
I’ve lived on East and West Coast in the US, visited most states and the places you mention in Canada, and I just moved from Washington to Maryland.
Realize that everything you listed as a preference is the same for millions of people. Lots of people like paddle boarding, nature, and the cities you are looking at, so those places are going to be expensive. Without knowing more about your acute needs to move I can only give general advice.
First, don’t move without a job lined up or at least a plan in place. Look at college towns including in more states than you listed. They are more liberal on average, and have a baked in supply of people looking for roommates. Even older grad students are looking for roommates and are often quiet.
After that, look for things to minimize costs like public transit. You say south of Maryland, but that covers a whole lot including places with pretty bad public transit.
When you do move make sure you have any vehicle titles or purchase documents as you will need them to get new titles and registration. Update your insurance policy with your new address. Make sure you have your birth certificate, social security cards, and photo id so you can get a place to live and get your new state id. Make sure you know what it costs to do all of that (likely hundreds on the title, registration, new id). Even more if you don’t have one of the necessary documents and you have to pay a notary to send a form to get a new title mailed to you.
Look at room mate apps or sites to potentially vet a low cost place you can move into more quickly than getting your own place and going through the credit checks and down payments for a lease.
And look at your credit to make sure you don’t move just to find that you won’t clear the checks they will perform.
Open a bank account at a bank or credit union with branches where you are moving to, or at least part of a no-fee ATM network. E.g., I can get cash from my credit union account without any fees from 7-11 and they are everywhere.
Make sure you have a few blank checks on your wallet for oddball expenses or deposits that don’t take cards or have fees to do so. Have a little cash as well.
Once you have a job planned, costs figured out, make a spreadsheet. MAKE A SPREADSHEET! You do not want to move across the country to find that you didn’t factor state income tax or vehicle registration costs and suddenly can’t make rent. Include all likely costs and see if your budget has some wiggle for miscalculations and other issues.
Make a spreadsheet of all the tasks you need to do. Keep track of them because the details of moving will screw you hard if you don’t mind them.
The more money you have while moving, the better you can solve problems. Hard truth for life in general.
If the above sounds overwhelming, then you need to plan all the more carefully.
Make sure you don’t make unrealistic assumptions about the culture of where you are moving and get taken advantage of our targeted for violence. Even in the most liberal places there are places and people unfriendly to LGBTQ people. Don’t be a victim.
Best of luck and happy to answer questions about specific cities, I’ve been to many.
Why would you want to move to the west coast? I assume you mean Perth or Fremantle. It’s so far from everything. East coast is much better. You’ve got Sydney and Melbourne and even Queensland. Tasmania is also nice if you don’t mind some cold winters.
Unless you can get a job in mining. Then maybe West coast is a good option.
Wrong country
OP doesn’t mention their country. What am I meant to assume? That they’re a stupid American?
If you’re willing to look at Toronto, maybe consider Minneapolis St Paul, it’s not that much further north than Toronto. I moved to Minnesota from Florida because I’m queer and I knew things were going to get worse in FL. Check out Queer Housing Exchange Minneapolis St Paul on Facebook to look for roommates, and make sure you have a few months of savings built up while you job search.
I moved to California from Texas with no job and about $300. Was supposed to stay with a friend’s sister in San Diego until I found a job, but promptly got kicked out because apparently her husband cheated on her with a woman who looked like me. :| Luckily I had an aunt 100 miles north who took me in.
I didn’t stay with her long though. OP, just keep in mind that you don’t need to get an apartment of your own – you can just rent a room for much cheaper. That’s what I did for a while until I could finally afford a studio apartment.
I moved from the US (MI) to France and then Spain, but am living with my parents while looking for jobs here, so a bit of a different situation regarding most of your questions, but I’ve helped some people move across the US so I have some experience there! If you have a car with a hitch, you can fairly cheaply rent a moving trailer from UHaul or something similar. That should apply to the US (and Canada I would think). Renting their vans tends to be quite expensive, and shipping is outrageous now, so that’s probably your best bet. Generally, if it will cost more to transport it then it would cost to replace it, it isn’t worth taking with you (this applies more towards shipping).
Haven’t been on the west coast of the US much, so I have no idea what or where to recommend for that, but I know it can be very expensive. I’ve heard Northern California can be relatively affordable, but no experience there. I doubt this was of much help, but I wish you the best in reaching a place where you’ll be happier!
