If I’m an adult who wants to experience splashing around and wading round the pool, but whose swimming capabilities extend as far as doggy paddling to safety and floating on my back - what can I even do to have fun at the pool?
What do you do at the pool?
Bonus round: kind of out of my budget to pay for swimming classes, and available friends & family are nil. :c
But I borrowed a life jacket from a coworker, and could buy cheap floaties or a pool noodle.
Teach my kids to swim, float on my back, practice holding my breath, do underwater laps, finally do that Slavic dance where you alternate balancing in you heels with kicks without tipping over…
Swim laps ya maggot!
/s /drill instructor
Just talk to people while getting out of the heat. Or sit waist deep in water and get drunk. That’s always a good time.
There is so much piss in those things… We all drank so much piss…
Wait, you drank the pool water?
You… drank the pool water?
where do you think the piss came from?
it’s the circle of liiiiiiiife! 🎶
Best bet is just have kids so you can splash and wade around with them…
Thats a serious investment. Op had the budget for a pool noodle and you recommend kids 😭
At least someone got the joke…
It only takes one lil noodle to get kids.
Swim.
Not get splashed or crowded by kids, mostly.
edit: lol, misinterpreted the question
Public pools have a shallow end and a deep end. It’s difficult (but not impossible!) to drown in the shallow end because you can just stand up, but you can still swim.
Most humans, especially fat Western humans, are naturally buoyant. Completely inert, most (fat) Western people will float above the bottom of their nose (because we’re fat.) Very lean or muscular people tend to be more neutrally buoyant or even negatively buoyant (sink), YMMV.
Most important thing to remember as an Aquatic Mammal is you WILL get water in your nose, and sometimes down your windpipe. DO NOT PANIC. It burns, you will want to cough. Resist that urge. If you are under water or do not have free air passage, DO NOT COUGH. Control the urge and break the surface, then you can go ham coughing and sputtering.
The most important thing about being in and around water is to be comfortable. If you’re not comfortable, you’re too deep. Get shallow.
source: PADI certified diver
most Western people will float above the bottom of their nose
Is that true of salt and fresh water? I’m pretty comfortable floating around in salt water but have grown paranoid with age about fresh water.
People are more buoyant in salt water because it has higher molar mass. Humans on average are about 90% density of water by mass so about 10% of your frame would float above the surface, which is generally enough to expose your nose. Of course you can articulate your neck, float on your back, tread water…
Salinity also matters. Salty water you might be up to 3% or 5% more buoyant, pound for pound, compared to fresh water.
Really, it depends on how fat and how salty, but generally the difference is less than 5% by mass.
My grandfather was an old-skool, wiry, dirt-farmer. He was unable to float above the surface in Utah’s Great Salt Lake.
I aspire to be that compactly muscular.
That … That’s baller. I’m “doughy” at best, and its all I’ll ever be.
It kind of depends on how much of your body is densely packed fat or muscle, but in a still pool I’ve never managed to float in a way that didn’t at least let me float with my mouth above the water.
I wouldn’t recommend anyone to go into the deep end of a pool without at least basic swimming skills, but if you can manage to remain calm, you can keep yourself from drowning pretty well, at least until help arrives.
If you can swim and want to try this out, please try not to look like a drowning person, or you’ll end up being dragged out of the water by a lifeguard (or at least get called out). The human body has an instinctive drowning response that doesn’t look at all like drowning people in the movies, and keeping your head just above the water can easily make you look like a drowning victim if you’ve got your arms side to side.
That stroke where you breathe out down and time your arms to breathe in to the side: I hate it. I don’t like the feeling of water on my face while I try to take a quick breath. That’s my secret: I’m always uncomfortable in the water…
Have you checked the local YMCA? Community college?
I float… at really weird times of the day when it’s pretty quiet.
👆🏽this person knows
'I be crazy too, little buddy, but at least when I be craziest, I be floating all alone in space and the crazy, she float out of me, she soak into the walls, and she don’t come out till there be battles and little boys bump into the walls and squish out de crazy.’
Poop in the shallow end
/s
“Baby” is in your name so it checks out.
Just be in the water. Even if all you do is basically walk or dog paddle laps around the perimeter at a very leisurely pace you’re getting good exercise in. Every movement you make in the water is resisted by the water.
Imo keeping stationary with your elbows out of the water burns more calories than most swimming. Best workout you can do is to keep your elbows dry while not touching the ground.
But all swimming is wonderful exercise. Just don’t float in the lane lines (sounds like op isn’t swimming when laps are happening)
Bounce around. Dive for coins or toys. Float. Chat with people. Some people water walk. I make my family and friends participate in made up Olympic events like race across the pool while sitting cross cross applesauce and only use your hands.
Some people water walk.
Yeah, but usually only if their 12 buddies are stressing out in a weather-weary boat
I used to have an in-ground pool at my home when I lived in Oklahoma. I would float on a pool noodle and sipping beer while listening to reggae. I was in my happy place. I miss having a pool.
I used to have access to a unsupervised swimming pool and would get a floaty chair and I just vibe floating around.
The kids would sometimes push me around like a game of pong.
But I like being in the water with friends and a loud speaker playing EDM.
Learning to swim in a pool with a shallow end isn’t too difficult for an adult. Just don’t pay attention to assholes or give up because it doesn’t come naturally.
Watch a video or two to learn the motions (breast stroke is easiest, but freestyle or side crawls are also good to start with), then just get in the pool (shallow end, please). Start by crouching down to the level of your mouth, and breathing through your nose. Become comfortable with water near your mouth.
Then dip your nose into the water and blow out through it at the same time (blowing bubbles). You’ll quickly get the hang of holding pressure in your airways so that water doesn’t enter when you dive below the surface. Once you get to that point, start laying face down in the water. You don’t even have to be stiff, or try to swim, just get used to having your back towards the sky. Finally, after the 20 minutes this will probably take you, start trying to mimic the motions on the videos you watched. Again, ignore the feeling that you suck at this, because everyone sucks at it when starting. You’re just an adult, so you realize how bad you are at the beginning, just like when learning a new instrument. With an hour or so of attempts, you’ll have a pretty good idea of how to move around the pool.
I like playing ball in the pool. With how stupid it looks, it burns a lot of energy while still being fun. It needs one other person though.
