Captain’s log, stardate 4200.69
51 new kinds of microbes have been discovered living in my seat because every time I flush it, the pleather or whatever the hell that cover is, is filled with piss and shit particles.
Don’t flush.
Def gonna be dropping some captain’s logs on that throne
I’ve had some shits where I could have used some strong arm support.
“Why is it called a restroom if I’m fighting for my life in here?”
I could’ve definitely used this for arm support for my Captains Log’s more than once.
The USS Relax-your-thighs
There is absolutely no valid engineering or social reason that the TP roll needs to be so far back on the right side. I want that mufkr right next to my knee, or a foot forward, and twelve inches higher. Why do we have to stretch, grope, and reach for a swath of TP?
Just get your TP Butler to hand you sheets as you need them like any normal person!
Because you’d have a bidet with a throne like this. TP is only there to dry off afterwards.
Keeps you nimble
The TP roll is just for backup, wiping is done by tractor beams.
Why does it look so much like an ice cream sandwich
That level of comfort facilitates dropping a fully intact and curved “captain’s log”.
