Seriously it really grinds my fucking gears that society shames people who don’t have any desire to be in a romantic relationship with anyone. There is nothing wrong with me just lift weights 4 days a week, playing video games and jerk off to my waifus everyday.

I don’t want to go on dates with anyone and I especially do not want anyone living with me because that would be hell.

  • Dr. Wesker@lemmy.sdf.org
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    5 months ago

    I’ve been a bachelor for the majority of the last 10 years. Relationships can sometimes be nice, but being by yourself can be nicer.

  • jet@hackertalks.com
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    5 months ago

    Enjoy your best life! seriously good for you. Most people don’t know what makes them happy and they just wander though life, your doing good to know yourself so well!

  • BertramDitore@lemmy.world
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    5 months ago

    Single-shaming is real. It’s particularly nasty because it can often come from family, friends, and strangers alike. And the media does it constantly.

    Most governments are set up to support and value married folks with tax breaks and incentives, fuck everybody else.

    Guess who’s less likely to be able to buy even a small house because you need at least two huge incomes these days to even qualify? That’s right, single people.

    I’ve been single for about a decade, and I’m overall pretty happy. Every once in a while I do find myself in a self-inflicted shame spiral, but I always tell myself “Bertram, this is your life, live it however you want to live it.”

    That said, I’m not opposed to finding a partner, somehow, but I’ve built a nice little life for myself so it’s just not a priority. Especially because I wouldn’t even know where to start…

  • BlameThePeacock@lemmy.ca
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    5 months ago

    Counter point, society wouldn’t exist if there weren’t reproductive pressures

    Luckily you get to choose whatever you want in this case, but as you’ve found out there are annoying consequences for your choice.

    • Ghostface@lemmy.world
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      5 months ago

      I wouldn’t say OP is advocating for everyone to adopt their path, just for individuals who take that path yo not feel stigmatized.

      I see two solutions to the issue presented. Issue one, proximity. I personally don’t hear or see the pressure to be in a relationship from ppl who aren’t. But family and friends who have a vested interest in the person, who also think relationship is the natural state will always worry.

      The solution to proximity involves part of solution 2 whivh is marketing. There should be a concept of monoship which society has largely forgotten. We had terms for them but never classified as a group. We would call these ppl “hermits” or “spinsters”. In reality introducing this concept and say your are in a relationship, just one a healthy monoship with yourself

    • piccolo@ani.social
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      5 months ago

      It makes sense as a social species that an evolutionary advantage would exist if some did not partake and was more free to support other’s offspring if the biological parents were unable for whatever reason.

  • Electric@lemmy.world
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    5 months ago

    Based independent man. We’d have a whole lot less incels and men with mental issues if there wasn’t such an ever present pressure/expectation to be in a relationship.

  • LesserAbe@lemmy.world
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    5 months ago

    If there’s one thing I learned from Civ V it’s you have to get your population numbers up in order to produce enough settlers

  • no banana@lemmy.world
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    5 months ago

    As someone who personally is in s romantic relationship I’ve always thought that it’s fucking weird to care about if others are single. I get why it’s done, culturally, but I think it’s a practice that should’ve been abandoned long ago.

  • frog_brawler@lemmy.world
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    5 months ago

    Well, try to think of it this way… you’ve actively decided on your single lifestyle in part because society sucks. Don’t give merit to the criticisms of those that you wouldn’t take advice from (there’s a better way to say that but that’s the best I could recall).

  • FartsWithAnAccent@lemmy.world
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    5 months ago

    As long as you’re happy and not hurting anyone, there’s nothing wrong with that. I chose to be single (and mostly celibate, minus some casual fooling around here and there) for years and enjoyed it quite a bit! Eventually I started dating again and ended up settling down but I don’t regret my single years and wouldn’t look down on anyone who chooses to live the single life.

    On an unrelated note, be sure to rotate which muscle groups you use when you’re weight training to avoid injuries: Give stuff time to rest/recover. You’re probably already doing this but wanted to mention it just in case (maybe throw some regular cardio in there too)

  • jordanlund@lemmy.world
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    5 months ago

    Not only that, you get actively PUNISHED for being single.

    I did the math when I was single, I was paying about 30% more in taxes as a single person than if I were married.

    • HeyThisIsntTheYMCA@lemmy.world
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      5 months ago

      dude, it’s called the marriage penalty for a reason. either your math was wrong or your situation was one of a few rare ones.

      • jordanlund@lemmy.world
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        5 months ago

        Or… just spitballin here… OR you might not know how taxes work for single vs. married.

        https://blog.turbotax.intuit.com/tax-planning-2/5-reasons-its-great-to-be-single-at-tax-time-33348/

        "What are some disadvantages of single people’s taxes?

        Why do single people sometimes pay more taxes? While singles may love the independence afforded by their relationship status, many single taxpayers face drawbacks in the form of:

        Fewer tax breaks

        Higher household expenses

        Bigger rent payments

        Other single-people tax disadvantages

        You might end up in a higher tax bracket

        Single people often face higher income tax rates than married couples filing together. Of course, this depends on your specific income level, but the respective tax brackets have much wider income ranges for married filers than singles.

        For example, single filers who make between $0 and $11,000 have a tax rate of 10%. That same rate applies to married people filing together who make up to $22,000. Single people who make $22,000 would have all income over that $11,000 threshold taxed at 12%.

        You’ll have a lower standard deduction

        The standard deduction is a specific dollar amount that reduces the amount of income you’re taxed.

        For 2023, the standard deduction for those married filing jointly was $27,700, while for single filers, it was $13,850 for single filers. Note that the standard deduction is typically adjusted for inflation each year."

            • HeyThisIsntTheYMCA@lemmy.world
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              5 months ago

              I have a better degree in the field than whatever degree you have is, and worked in taxes for a few decades. Prepared both MFJ and MFS for every client every year. Guess how many MFS were better?

              • DarkThoughts@fedia.io
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                5 months ago

                If you’re so well educated and apparently old, why are you wasting your time playing smartass troll on Lemmy like a bratty little kid?

  • TrendigOsthyvel@lemmy.world
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    5 months ago

    I lived the life of a straight man for many years, after a breakup I just felt fed up with everything. Trying to be attractive, sacrificing much of my interests and preferences. It felt as i was playing a role in the theater. Later on, I got reconnected with an old friend who where at the same spot in life. We figured we wanted to live a different life above all the physical and intimate parts of a relationship. We moved in together in an semi-industrial/farming property and started living the chill life, focusing on what made us both happy. Fishing, camping, building weird projects, the lot of it. Those days where quite rock n roll. Simple and quite rough, but we had fun. More then ten years have passed and today we live in small house at the countryside. A little land, nice garden, a dog. You name it. We even run our own business today, quite well even. Nearing our forties, we have no plans of doing things differently from what we are already doing, as we have no regrets. We are not romantically involved, no plan on kids or nothing the like. But we love living as two guys sharing almost everything. We look forward getting older together and not being alone. We are privileged being able to live like this without being lynched by an angry mob… I feel for those who can’t or are stuck in the old rigid ways.

    The heteronorm can go suck a bag of dicks, you live life as you want to, not as others expect you.

  • Carighan Maconar@lemmy.world
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    5 months ago

    As someone who has spent the past few years in a mostly-FwB (of course over the years it grows a tad closer) relationship with someone and where both are quite happy with that arrangement, yeah sure.

    My partner doesn’t come along to my family either. We got a relationship, but we’re not a “couple”, in the traditional sense. And that’s just as well. I don’t feel much desire to have a romantic relationship right now, not a “usual” one at least.

  • MrGerrit@feddit.nl
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    5 months ago

    Being single is so chill. No extra families to go to during holidays or birthdays, you can do what you want. No need to keep track of someone else’s calendar.

    No arguments. I always hate when the say: in every relationship you will have arguments. No thank you, I don’t to waste time on that.