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Also religion: we gave birth to you so you’re automatically sign up to our religion.
Also also religion: you’re free to convert into our religion, but you’re not allowed to leave.
Also also also religion: since you’ve converted into our religion, you are mandatory to ditch your name and use our system.
Also also also also religion: send religion police to patrol the street for religious compliance
Religious people are objectively the worst.
The Mormons claim to want to help with anything right? What if I asked them to help teach tolerance and empathy to the maga?
Easy answer. Just push selling whatever you want on them. Hell make up stembolts.
Self-sealing I hope?
Those come at a premium.
It’s worth it though. And what about some delicious yamok sauce?
They’d defend themselves by saying you can just turn them away, while completely ignoring that they can choose to not consume media with queer people in it. And when they whine that the problem is that it’s in too much stuff now and they can’t avoid it, they’re once again trying to control what’s in media and they’ve gone full circle.
Please remember, they are not there to convince you of their faith! They are there to be rejected. They sent out 18yos with a up until that point unknown other 18yo person to a far away place, then tell each other them that they should look after each other. So now they effectively spy on each other and know their only “friend” in that situation is expecting them to behave like a good elder. Then they were told that the outside world is rejecting god as it was corrupted by the devil and now they are running around and approaching random houses and bother the people living there, which will obviously mostly reject them.
This is fucking brainwashing.
Look up the BITE model…
- Behavior: imagine living with only 1 person that you are supposed to spent your whole day with and that person spies on you and you know it.
- Information: the mission is supposed to prove that the outside world rejects them
- Thought: you are supposed to focus on the mission and god alone.
- Emotion: fear based indoctrination by being told that the world rejects them and their only support is a member of the organization.
It is fucking cultish
I loved that movie
I thought it fell apart in the third act.
Oh it had so many problems. I still loved it.
so what about gay religious people? i mean two well groomed men on bikes traveling in unison…
Every accusation is a confession
Mormons are so funny, I legit feel bad for all the people who have been traumatized by these weirdos, but like these children are called “elders.”
They have all these weird rules where premarital sex is totally not permissible, but they be fucking, and then be like “its not sex with a condom on” or of course soaking. Like straight faced “I’m saving myself for marriage,” and I’m like “we’ve had sex 6 times this week, Genevieve.”
I was at a party in college and this Mormon dude who always did these awkward, overly complicated jive handshakes that felt really violating, was sitting outside upset and depressed holding a half-empty beer. He was like “its all over I’ve sacrificed everything I believe in, for what? So I can drink a beer at a party??” It was one beer he wasn’t even finished with it. Its like relax dude, I’m like 19 and spiraling into alcoholism I think you’ll be okay this one time.
Ive heard so many horror stories, but I’ve only had good and very funny experiences with Mormons. And none of this even gets into the magic underwear or like you get your own planet in the afterlife.
Idk how people believe in this stuff sober
Projections gonna project
One day I was headed to my car to go somewhere. A zealot intercepted me and wanted to proselytize to me. I told him thank you but no thank you. He was all like “But have you heard about Jesus Christ?” I said that I was raised a Christian and knew all about it, but I reject it. He still was trying to argue with me so I finally just said “Have a nice day” and walked away as he was still trying to reconvert me. Some of them simply can’t believe you know what they are about but don’t buy into it.
I just hand them SubGenius pamphlets and tell them about the good word of our guru, Saint of Sales, J. R. “Bob” Dobbs.
They haven’t been back in a while, don’t know why…
Jesus loved his bro’s
His bro’s what?
😏
What really fucking sucks is realizing South Park’s creators seem to believe this unironically.
I’m always pulled back to their endless transphobia and gay baiting when compared to their love-in with Mormons.
If you think South Park or the creators have ever praised Mormonism, you have completely missed the satire and point of every Mormon related episode of the show, every movie they have made, and especially their Broadway musical, The Book of Mormon.
If you think South Park or the creators have ever praised Mormonism
They straight up literally have. Repeatedly and frequently. Matt and Trey having Cartoon God explicitly state that he’s only letting Mormons into Heaven is about as much glowing praise as a cartoon about Satan having anal sex with Saddam Hussein and Donald Trump can churn out.
Put up against Britney Spears blowing her own head of with a shotgun and George Clooney asphyxiating on the smug farts of his electric car, and it really stands out.
The Book of Mormon
A stage play that collaborated with the Mormon Church to prostelatyze.
Throw a few dick jokes into Shen Yun and its still propaganda. This is a story of Mormon Missionaries going abroad and helping a bunch of backwards primitive Africans find entitlement through (a comic reinterpretation of) the Mormon faith.
Rudyard Kipling could hardly have done worse.
Remember how South Park Kanye reacted to the gay fish joke? This guy right here ☝🏻
Wait, are you trying to say that the creators of South Park like Mormonism?
If you think the musical skewers Mormons, though, think again. Parker and Stone do challenge the literal credibility of the story of The Church of Jesus Christ of Latter-day Saints. But the Mormons they write about come across as lovable and optimistic.
“I don’t think anybody would want to see a two-hour-long Mormon-bashing, and we wouldn’t want to see that either,” Parker tells Fresh Air’s Terry Gross. “We love the goofiness of Mormon stories. Some of them are incredulous, and we loved almost all the Mormons that we had ever met. So this was sort of this conundrum that we like to talk about — we think what they believe is really, really ridiculous, and yet they seem like pretty happy people.”
…
Along with critical acclaim, the musical has received largely positive feedback from Mormons who have seen the show, Parker says.
"The official church response was something along the lines of ‘The Book of Mormon the musical might entertain you for a night, but the Book of Mormon,’ — the book as scripture — ‘will change your life through Jesus,’ " Stone says. “Which we actually completely agree with. The Mormon church’s response to this musical is almost like our Q.E.D. at the end of it. That’s a cool, American response to a ribbing — a big musical that’s done in their name.”
“Before the church responded, a lot of people would ask us, ‘Are you afraid of what the church would say?’ And Trey and I were like, ‘They’re going to be cool.’ And they were like, ‘No, they’re not. There are going to be protests.’ And we were like, ‘Nope, they’re going to be cool.’ We weren’t that surprised by the church’s response. We had faith in them.”
This amounts to the way that I look at my dog. It’s loveable and outwardly friendly, but also stupid and destructive and terrible at driving. This isn’t an indictment, it’s a sincere and level-headed critique from an agnostic perspective on religion from a time before people needed to SLAM others for attention.
This amounts to the way that I look at my dog.
Sure. But then you still love your dog. And if you’re writing love letters to your dog in your televised comedy, that sticks out. Especially when the other half of your episodes involve cartoonishly shoving firecrackers up your neighbor’s cat’s asshole.
I don’t know that I can describe what 2000s and 2010s satire was like in a way that folks not around for it could understand. Following the episode where you point out how stupid a religion’s premise is with “only Mormons get into heaven” is meant to be taken as a joke.
Following the episode where you point out how stupid a religion’s premise is
While shamelessly glazing its members. Gary, the Mormon counterpart to the South Park gang is Twilight Vampire levels of perfect at everything. The punchline of the whole episode is that the dogma of the religion doesn’t matter, because the practitioners are these perfect, charming, innocent people. And you’re all kinda assholes for bringing up their religion to begin with.
Like, that’s the joke. The final beat of the episode is laughing at you, the audience, for thinking Mormons aren’t cool.
“Dumb religion, decent people” pretty succinctly describes my impression of Mormons. I really take no issue.
Making jokes about trans people is not transphobia.
The Steven Crowder Defense is a classic
the most offensive lines (and this is where trans people might want to stop reading) in the episode come from Garrison herself, when she becomes incensed that she can’t get her period or get pregnant. “This would mean I’m not really a woman. I’m just a guy with a mutilated penis,” Garrison says. “You made me into a freak.”
Really comedy gold
“Just because you’d offended doesn’t mean you’re right.”
Ah, the soul soliciting pigfuckers are at the door.
