“Do my job for me?”

“No.”

It’s important to have a scarier, if less dangerous, boogie man when one endeavors to do terrible things to otherwise rational people.

Because we didn’t know what was going on. Reagan paved the way for Trump, and it goes back even further. This has been several decades in the making. Sorry if I’m preaching to the choir here. Thanks for entertaining my rant.

Hank Scorpio : Uh, hi, Homer. What can I do for you?

Homer : Sir, I need to know where I can get some business hammocks.

Hank Scorpio : Hammocks? My goodness, what an idea. Why didn’t I think of that? Hammocks! Homer, there’s four places. There’s the Hammock Hut, that’s on third.

Homer : Uh-huh.

Hank Scorpio : There’s Hammocks-R-Us, that’s on third too. You got Put-Your-Butt-There.

Homer : Mm-Hmm.

Hank Scorpio : That’s on third. Swing Low, Sweet Chariot… Matter of fact, they’re all in the same complex; it’s the hammock complex on third.

Homer : Oh, the hammock district!

Hank Scorpio : That’s right.

Maybe it’s a typo? A mandate from a few Americans people? A mandate by the American Assets? A mandate from the BRICS people?

Me too. That quote evoked from me the loudest snort of derision in recent memory.

Emergency Broadcast System: This is not a test. This is your emergency broadcast system announcing the commencement of the Quadrennial Purge enacted by the U.S. Presidentt. Citizens classed at $100M net worth and higher have been authorized the commission of any and all crimes with impunity. All other classes are restricted. Government officials of ranking 10 have been granted immunity from the Purge and shall not be harmed. Commencing at the siren, any and all crime, including murder, will be legal for the rich for 48 continuous months. Fire, and emergency medical services will be unavailable as soon as they’re defunded and until next term when The Purge concludes. Blessed be our New Founding Fathers and America, a nation reborn. May God be with you all.

That’s exactly it. Damned if you do. Damned if you don’t. I think they probably made the smart choice. I assume breaking the law to follow orders would have been used as an excuse to make arrests and parade them around as corrupt, deep-state, Bidenistas.

Yeah, it would have been more honest just to tell USAID employees to lick their elbows.

Yeah, but I think that was mass hysteria caused by bad PR. Clowns fill an important niche in the ecosystem. They generally keep to themselves and shy away from people. Confirmed clown attacks are extremely rare. Even the 2016 sightings had more to do with development companies expanding into their historic habitat than clowns actively seeking out people. I saw a movie once in which a clown was forced to live in a storm drain after his home was paved over. Starving and panicked, the inevitable happened when he was cornered by a child. Had he been relocated, he could have joined another circus and lived a full life. If you see a clown in town, remain calm. Do not approach the clown. Do not feed it. A fed clown is a dead clown. Contact your local ringmaster. They are especially trained to capture and relocate clowns. If you can, I highly recommend donating to your local clown rescue. As a side benefit, they often have education programs that allow kids to learn about and interact with them safely.

The monkey’s paw curls.

By July, the southeastern United States is battered by storm after storm. The Gulf Coast and much of Florida are devastated, with levees failing, cities flooding, and millions displaced. The media dubs it “The Year of the Tempest.”

With much of the southeastern U.S. uninhabitable, millions of displaced people flee their homes to other states. Entire communities pack what little they can carry and flee inland. Many seek refuge in neighboring states, but the sheer volume of displaced people overwhelms resources. The refugees keep moving, spreading across the country, heading as far as California and the Midwest.

At first, they are met with compassion. Towns open their doors, offering shelters and supplies. But the strain is enormous. Schools overflow, hospitals run out of beds, and housing markets skyrocket.

The social fabric begins to tear. The newcomers carry with them not just their belongings, but their political and cultural beliefs. Many are deeply conservative, opposed to the progressive policies in the states that take them in. School boards clash over curriculum changes. Gun laws, environmental regulations, and LGBTQ+ rights become battlegrounds in communities that had once considered these issues settled.

What starts as a humanitarian crisis quickly becomes a cultural and political one.

By the end of the year, the consequences of the wish are undeniable. Many states see their progressive majorities evaporate. Refugees from the southeastern U.S., driven by desperation and fear, vote in droves to undo the policies of their host states. Climate action bills are tabled as state legislatures pivot to immigration control and oil subsidy.

Meanwhile, the southeastern states, still battered and uninhabitable, become a no-man’s-land, a haunting reminder of the devastation. The hurricanes force millions to leave, but the political ideologies that resist change endure, spreading like a second storm across the country.

It’s very demonstrably how that works in the context of recent US history. It shouldn’t, but it does.

…again

Would you mind retracting your statement? I feel like this is unfair to clowns.