Sedona would be an interesting place to celebrate the winter solstice! Some friends who once lived there invited me to go camping in February at a “vortex point”. It was a really nice experience but a bit chilly at night.

Dialectical behavior therapy has helped me with suicidal ideation. DIY’ing it without a therapist might be difficult at first but the game is to observe your initial thoughts and feelings about whatever is happening, challenge those with reality testing or more helpful alternatives, then reach a synthesis which serves you instead of harms you. My time with therapists was almost a decade ago so this might be a terrible explanation but it’s the best I have at the moment. Suppose for instance that a motorist blows straight through a stop light long after the light has changed. My habitual thoughts and feelings will likely be full of disgust. This is everything wrong with the world all at one: the capitalism, the cars, the Anthropocene, the selfishness! But maybe my assumptions about the driver are incorrect, maybe it would be helpful in this situation to try to empathize with that driver. What were they feeling and thinking? And what about everyone else that’s around, are they interesting right now? What is stopping me from observing without judgement but instead acceptance? Somehow this helps me get back to awe and wonder even in the horror.

You likely have some unhelpful habitual thoughts and feelings on top of the shit life syndrome of living in a vehicle. I’m sorry you’re struggling now. You deserve better! I enjoy reading your contributions and I’m glad you are here. Hopefully you overcome this soon.

Welcome and congratulations! Plume and Folx offer telehealth services and therapy for a monthly fee.

IM injection works the best for most folks but estrogel is the safest. Doing buccal with pills was just a waste of time for me. If I had it all to do over again I’d start with injections. It probably seems scary to you right now but injections are where you will most likely end up so just go ahead and start off right.

Have patience with yourself because sourcing crypto, injectables, and injection supplies isn’t a figure it all out in one night kind of a thing. The hardest part about DIY is learning how to use crypto, so step one is to install a software wallet like Electrum-LTC and figure out how to get funds into it in your country. If you’re extra paranoid for some reason learn how to transfer LTC into an XMR wallet.

There’s some simple math to figure out how much to inject based on the concentration of your vial. Swapable Luer lock needles with 18G to draw and 23G to inject make it easy for me and almost pain free. They usually have a bit of “dead space” inside the needles so I pull all the medication out of the 18G into the syringe, swap to the 23G, and fill it up till a drop forms at the tip of the needle.

Keeping a small makeup bag stocked with some hand sanitizer, disinfecting wipes, cotton balls, bandages, syringes, needles, and the vial makes for a nice all in one grab and go.

Also, pride and joy are their own forms of resistance. There’s no time like the present to get even weirder in MAGA eyes.

I’m really sorry that you’re feeling overwhelmed! The last time cheetolini was in office was bad and this time is already worse. The easiest thing you can do right now is to take a deep breath and try meditation if you haven’t. There might be some mutual aid groups nearby. That’s where you should go if you need help. If you’re trans, visiting with your local trans support group could be really helpful. You’re welcome to message me too if you want.

Yep!

It is important to note that this will, in turn, cause a surge in testosterone levels, which may be very dysphoric and unpleasant for patients.

Have a look at A Gender-Affirming Approach to Fertility Care for Transgender and Gender-Diverse Patients. Sperm production can usually be restarted with human chorionic gonadotropin, Raloxifene, or Clomifene.

The first hyperlink in the article itself, to the original reporting, is free of transphobic language. Why share the version with a hateful reframing?

https://www.bridgemi.com/talent-education/michigan-transgender-youths-continue-high-school-sports-despite-trump-order

https://www.vcinfodocs.com/ is also relevant, if you are up for going down this rabbit hole. Chaos is a ladder for all of us no matter the source. Organize.

Reducing your dose in order to feel safer is a bad idea. Why not instead focus that anxious energy on educating yourself in a new science hobby? There are many interesting projects involving estrogen!

Yes indeed! You might wish to look into the idea of double consciousness, the dual self-perception experienced by subordinated or colonized groups in an oppressive society. Its a sense of attempting to perceive yourself as both who you know yourself to be and as an oppressive other will perceive you. If you want to smash that noise then you need to learn to stop being ashamed of yourself!

Also, you definitely should be taking the self-defense class appropriate to your gender as violence is very often gendered. There’s a podcast episode of The Gender Rebels about one trans women’s experience taking Krav Maga you might want to give a listen.

Good luck and take care :)

Yeah the boot process is a mess! Debian’s noisy GRUB and unsightly boot text is an obvious and unnecessary paint point for a desktop user but very desirable for server installations. You do have some options though!

Carlo Contavalli apparently has a relatively simple work-around discussed at https://rabexc.org/posts/grub-shush. What I’ve done in the past is rebuilding Ubuntu’s source deb package for GRUB against my Debian system. You can grab it at https://packages.ubuntu.com/source/lunar/grub2. Build instructions can be found here https://unix.stackexchange.com/questions/117503/how-to-compile-a-debian-package-from-source.

The great thing about Debian, Linux, and FLOSS is that you can even automate downloading Debian’s source package when it gets updated, applying the silent patch, applying Ubuntu’s compilation options, compiling the deb, and installing the deb! But yeah why can some package maintainer not provide such as an option in the repository! It’s really an annoyance for many and almost makes me feel like I’m not the type of user the Debian community desires. Like, “Wait… what? You like pretty stuff? GTFO!” Maybe its even true? Hopefully you will enjoy using Debian! Its most preferable to Ubuntu in many ways these days!

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That sums it right up I think but supposedly its for the worlds creditors who all read your local newspaper to watch for us changing our names just to get away from debts.

Yep! It’s been five years so far of hrt for me and I still haven’t legally changed my name. Most likely that’s due to having felt like names were all fake for so much of my life. Yet why was I so jealous of my friend who just picked her own new name in grade school and got away with it? My state in the us still requires running a newspaper ad for a while which isn’t something I’m looking forward to and the state I was born in requires gcs to change birth certificates. There’s a fair possibility that I’m intersex as well though which would allow me to have my birth certificate changed to reflect that with only a test of some sort. I’m definitely going to get it all done before the end of the next presidential election here since who knows what horrors might happen if the republicans won in this climate.