How to end any argument. Well I got suspended for 3 days for singing old McDonald. Fucking legend.

What sounds like glass cracking?

How long before it is mandated that all govt officials can only use the T1 phone?

I really want to go inland, but then I’d be a Baygull.

Maybe an Owl carried the coconut here.

Sweet boat. Well it was.

Thank you. That was some “wow” reading.

I do love his videos. Very informative. Also this CNN story claims are over a 12hr period. Silly stats IMO.

I’m a middle aged guy, so I only use Snapchat. Because me and my friends have children and no free time so that’s how we keep in touch and share our lives.

I’m a Honky Tronk man. 🎸 🎶

Not with the current price of eggs

Look, they aren’t doing anything, I should cut their funding…oh shit that wasn’t good. I guess I’ll spend a third of our taxes on this.

Toes? I do pushups with my penis. One, two, 360, three, four.

But they smell like up dog.

I’ve put worse things in my mouth today.

I’m going to make a list of people that don’t like me.

1. Myself
2. Mechanics, because I learned “this one simple trick”

That’s enough for today.

My favorite is finding them in the bathroom at 2am with my foot

My watch says I got 3.5 hours of sleep and 5682 steps last night

I feel this way about working out in the hotel parking lot. Maybe I’ll just workout in my room. Oh look, a TV and bed.