So I spent the money on a NASA level bidet for that reason. Everyone I knew had been getting bidets and nobody would shut up about it, but they were all getting the $40 wands from Amazon. I couldn’t imagine my poor innocent pucker taking an icy blasting daily, so when we bought one we got the full toilet seat replacement with heated dryer, seat and water heater.
After about 6 months I decided to turn the water heater off to save the .78cents a month in electricity, because it really didn’t make a difference to me. The water is in the little hose and in the pipes of the house sitting and waiting for my butt for hours, it’s perfectly room temp. I’ve never had a situation where my partner uses it first and then I do and the warm water runs down, or any other situation that would create that perfect storm, so I won’t be buying one with a heater again…
The real life lesson I learned getting this bidet was because of the heated seat. You know the expression “you don’t know what you go til it’s gone”?
Well at first I noticed the welcoming warmth of the seat, and because the toilet is extra smart it “learns” when to expect me and my partner and preheats the seat to save energy.
But when I am off my routine, even just the weekends sometimes, I’ll go and take a seat: instant sad. It’s not freezing or anything, just unexpected enough and very mildly unpleasant. Something I never noticed before in my life (of luxury I guess, never had a bathroom so cold in my house that the change was shocking enough to register a memory.)
Now, every other toilet in the world is a very mild disappointment. This is a Greek tragedy in modern times.
Eek. Then every time the water line from the water heater got to room temperature because it’s been six minutes since you last ran the bidet, it’d say “water not found” because the standing water in the water line was “out of date”.
When are the bidet advocates gonna show up? This post has been up for like an hour!
Yeah, but sub $100 usually means cold water. A stream of chilly water up your butthole is a bad time.
My partner and I were concerned about that originally but it’s really a non issue for either of us, it’s still way better than not having one.
So I spent the money on a NASA level bidet for that reason. Everyone I knew had been getting bidets and nobody would shut up about it, but they were all getting the $40 wands from Amazon. I couldn’t imagine my poor innocent pucker taking an icy blasting daily, so when we bought one we got the full toilet seat replacement with heated dryer, seat and water heater.
After about 6 months I decided to turn the water heater off to save the .78cents a month in electricity, because it really didn’t make a difference to me. The water is in the little hose and in the pipes of the house sitting and waiting for my butt for hours, it’s perfectly room temp. I’ve never had a situation where my partner uses it first and then I do and the warm water runs down, or any other situation that would create that perfect storm, so I won’t be buying one with a heater again…
The real life lesson I learned getting this bidet was because of the heated seat. You know the expression “you don’t know what you go til it’s gone”?
Well at first I noticed the welcoming warmth of the seat, and because the toilet is extra smart it “learns” when to expect me and my partner and preheats the seat to save energy.
But when I am off my routine, even just the weekends sometimes, I’ll go and take a seat: instant sad. It’s not freezing or anything, just unexpected enough and very mildly unpleasant. Something I never noticed before in my life (of luxury I guess, never had a bathroom so cold in my house that the change was shocking enough to register a memory.)
Now, every other toilet in the world is a very mild disappointment. This is a Greek tragedy in modern times.
If a bidet user was also an Arch user, which would they tell you about first?
An Arch user, who’s vegan, does CrossFit, and owns a bidet. I think their head would explode trying to figure out which to talk about.
About the marathon they ran last month?
About their smart bidet running on arch
Eek. Then every time the water line from the water heater got to room temperature because it’s been six minutes since you last ran the bidet, it’d say “water not found” because the standing water in the water line was “out of date”.