When you ask a British guy how much he weighs but he starts counting the rocks on the floor.
When you ask a british guy how tall he is, but he starts listing the number of OnlyFans accounts he follows
what
👣
Sorry, I’m really not getting it. I’d love to play in the space but I’m just not.
Pretty sure Brits do height in cm. But even if they did do feet and inches, then I’d have to understand it as “you” (the person miscontruing their statement) counting OnlyFans account subscriptions by the number of feet they have? Which is a very telling misunderstanding to have.
There has to be something I’m missing.
Nope, we Brits use feet and inches for height. Miles for long distances, meters for medium distances, inches for small distances and millimetres for very small. If you’re old then you probably use feet for medium distances. Pints for alcohol, litres for everything else. Stone for the weight of people, kg for everything else unless you’re over 60 or cooking, in which case it’s pounds and ounces. Speed is in miles per hour unless you’re in physics class, then it’s meters per second
A person in the U.S. might say their height is 6’5" (six feet, five inches.) Put into centimeters, that’s a little over 195.
The joke is that the number is really high, and without context (like by specifying “195 cm”) it could represent a variety of things. OP chose to make it represent “OnlyFans accounts to follow.”
If there is any additional point to specifying it as “OnlyFans,” I didn’t pick up on it. Anyway, I hope this helps the rest of that comment make a little more sense.
Well i just thought OnlyFans were about feet pictures, so when someone says I’m 6 foot 5, that could (with some effort) be misconstrued as how many feet pics seen
British people are annoying more likely to reply in imperial units to this question.
Yes, but we use Stones to measure body weight.
Oh then I was being dense. I actually use kg because I’m of a generation that was only taught that and have no internal conception of stones :(
Ask a british person if they know about stones and they’ll answer in kg/m³
Ok, but what’s heavier, a kilogram of steel or a kilogram of feathers?
The feathers. They carry the weight of what you did to those birds.
My scale doesn’t account for that. Where did you get yours?
Brill answer but see what Limmy has to say aboot it
African or European?
When you ask a British guy his salary, but a cultural stigma surrounding talking openly about money makes him too uncomfortabe to answer and he changes the subject.
All right, then. Keep your secrets.
What’s your salary ?
What’s going on with the weather mate? Fuckin needs to make up its mind init, yesterday in shorts today jumper.
Do you think this is an acceptable dish to eat ?
anyone questioning this has just simply never eaten it.
I have bad news for you:
You might be British
Words only possible from someone who hasn’t tried it. “Have you seen this caviar? DESGUSTENG”
Batter looks a bit flabby and chips not great.
The decider though is whether it’s cod or haddock (as depending on where in England one or the other will be an instant no).
WOULD
Looks awesome. And I’m not even British.
It also looks like a heart attack, but so does hamburgers
Omg I saw this five minutes ago and I want it so badly. It’s still only breakfast time too.
If we know each other, I’d tell you in a heartbeat. On the internet where someone will just vacuum it up into their dataset? Not a chance.
You’re also allowed to just tell lies on the internet.
But we don’t get paid in Newtons…
A pound is about 4.4 Newtons
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Pound is both. There are two units that both are named pound, one is for mass, the other for force.
This is generally referred to as pound-force (lbf) instead of just pound (lb). At least, that’s what we use at my engineering firm when converting from Newtons so I may be misinformed.
how about i break the laws of physics
how bout you doo
anyway
W = mg
Oops
The correct unit of mass is the slug, which is 14.59kg
People insisting on using pounds as mass is why the physics formulas need extra steps in imperial.
On a serious note: why is it the norm in the US to state your annual gross salary? For context: I’m in the EU and to me it makes a lot more sense to deal with a monthly, take home (i.e. after taxes) sum. Moreover most people here don’t even have access to the non-taxed amount - they receive the net amount directly.
US companies define pay either hourly or annually. In general upper and middle management will make an annual salary and the people actually doing the work will be hourly. So some of the people making annual pay believe it to be very important people know they aren’t an hourly worker.
Thanks for explaining. So it’s kind of a class thing too - I didn’t know that. Still, I’ve heard (read) about a lot of folks in engineering and manufacturing (so not management) talking about their annual numbers.
Right, that’s the third group. People who do higher priced work that upper management doesn’t want to pay overtime for.
Don’t forget the contractors, we flooded the market with contractor positions for a few different reasons. Some having to do with firing practices, same with insurance practices.
Then there’s the bids for jobs where contractors can take the job and some of those can be sketchy with subcontractors who may or may not be legally allowed to work or be getting paid rates that are legitimate.
Example: Beagal Cinema’s says they want an overnight cleaning crew that will clean all the theaters/floors/bathrooms and such nightly. Another company tells them they can do it for $500(made up number) a night. Then that contractor hires anyone, say 4 people and they bring their kids. Run through and clean it all up between 3am-9am every morning. Each one of them takes home $100 a day, and the contract-owner keeps $100. Beagal isn’t illegally hiring children in said case, and neither is the contractor, but the kids are having to work many nights a week with their parents to get the job done in time so they can be dropped off for school or maybe do homeschooling. (But those parents often don’t speak English, so I assume they would want their kids to go to a school to learn english at the very least).
Worked at a theater that did that from 2006-2012. So it isn’t a new thing.
…every employer i’ve worked with endeavors to put people doing the actual work on salary as soon as possible, so they can harvest that sweet sweet unpaid overtime for maximum profitability…
Because so much depends on the income tax based on the tax year. We calculate our taxes based on our annual income. Our qualifications for government benefits (subsidized housing, food, healthcare, financial aid for universities) are keyed to our annual income, as reported on our taxes. Many programs, even for richer people, also look to income: tax credits for electric cars, specialized retirement accounts, etc.
And because lying on your taxes is a serious crime, many private banks and landlords use those annual figures as proof of income for loans, credit cards, long term leases, etc.
It just pervades how we think of money, on an annual basis.
lying on your taxes is a serious crime if you’re poor
In the US about 5-10% of people are “self-employed” and have access to all their pre-tax income.
Essentially a single employee business, they are required to withhold their own taxes from their earnings, including the employment taxes normally paid by the employer, etc. which is an additional 15.5% on top of the progressive income tax.
Aside from that, in the US there are forms you fill out at the beginning of employment which determine how much is to be withheld. While they can be updated at any time, it’s not always done promptly. Divorce or death of a dependant child could increase how much is withheld.
I have been self employed for almost 20 years. I pay a far higher tax rate than billionaires and I haven’t been able to afford to go to the dentist even once in that time.
Fair point. It didn’t make sense to me because where I am you have mostly no say on the pre-taxed amount.
If you’re employed by a company, it has to pay taxes for you which are mostly going the state health insurance and state retirement funds, up to a particular sum (which is around the average salary for everyone - so if you’re making more than that, you’re not having more put aside towards retirement). A lot of companies offer extra (private) health insurance as a perk, but it’s fully optional. From then on you can save into a private retirement fund, but again fully optional and up to the person.
If you’re (legally) self-employed, you kind of have to do the same thing by yourself, you just have the liberty to decide how much to declare as your salary (people here usually as little as possible so as to pay as little taxes as possible). If you’re in the grey/black market segment and you don’t pay anything, you’d have to 1) pay for the basic state health insurance yourself (otherwise, if something happens, you’re paying way bigger sums out of pocket) and 2) you have to make up for the length of service, otherwise (if you don’t have enough years of work) you can’t retire.
Edit: I meant to reply to https://lemm.ee/comment/20945227 , but I guess it applies to your comment as well.
In Europe people use annual gross salary when they earn enough too.
Monthly after-tax is usually used by lower income people, where low short-term numbers really matter (“Can I make my rent this month?”, “Can I afford to buy/do this small thing this month?”), while annual gross salary is used by people who make a lot of money, where the day-to-day financials don’t matter, but long-term stuff does, and where you also generally have much higher tax pay backs.
I used per-hour salary when I was in university and only worked a few hours per week. I switched to monthly after-tax when I got into an entry-level job that paid quite little, and when I got to higher-paying senior/expert level jobs, I started using yearly figures.
Maybe it differs from country to country then - not necessarily representative for the whole EU. The only time I’ve heard yearly figures is when talking to colleagues from abroad. I’m making above average, and even from folks making 2-3 times more I’ve only heard monthly.
Edit: all job offers (at least those that state a range or a number) are monthly net too.
Yeah, could totally be a regional difference.
I had the same thing when negotiating for salaries too, so it wasn’t just when talking to people, but it was in a more official way as well, and I even got it in my contract like that.
When I was working as a tutor, my contract listed my pay in hourly pay, because I worked varying hours and I was paid by the hour. On my entry-level job my contract was in monthly before-tax pay, but negotiations were with monthly after-tax pay. And my later jobs were all in yearly before-tax pay, which might also have been relevant that way because in some of these jobs I had yearly bonuses and/or part of the payment in stock I got once a year. So with these yearly figures in there, probably it just made sense make everything yearly.
You can do quite a bit with your pay “pre tax”. Fund your retirement 401k, fund your healthcare plans HSA/FSA, fund child care dependant plan, vision, dental, life insurance… If I said my income was only what hits my bank account then i would be understating my income by quite a bit.
as an american, i have to assume its because its a bigger number. “graphs go up and right, and bigger numbers are better.” is a motto for a lot of terrible practices here.
one of these that has been bothering me lately is when people state something like “ten times less!”. this statement means nothing to me, but it has a bigger number than a % of total.
The other reason likely has to do with taxes. If I was making 50k a year and filing my taxes as a single earner, I’m going to end up with a different take home vs if I was married filing jointly and my spouse made 300k. Plus all of the other things we can have and adjust as deductibles and pretax things like 401k, 403b, Insurance, HSA, etc.
“How many second breakfasts do you eat gosh”
35,000 pounds of $100 bills would be $1,587,573,295 a year. Rich bastard.
But it’s pounds sterling right? So at $496/pound of sterling silver, we’re only at $17.36 million.
sorry all I got is quarters
Drives me crazy they report athlete wages by the weekly pay. Like bro just give the annual number im not trying to do math. I just imagine Premier league players waiting in line at the bank on Friday trying to cash their weekly wage checks
Do they get paid in the off-season, or are there a set number of paid weeks per year?
No it’s shamefully only a meager 50.000.000 a month during the active season when they are not off. /j
I have no idea! Their pay is so mysterious over there. Plus they usually only report the transfer fee which the teams just pay each other that doesn’t involve the players salary at all lol. It’s pretty wild I like to think I’m above average soccer enjoyer but I never really dug deep into how they get paid.
NFL contracts are easy to understand. Player signs for x amount guaranteed with x amount in incentives. Boom that’s it. You’re done you know what they get paid if they play all the games or none of the games.
At least for footballers they got paid at the start of the season AFAIK.
That because since Brexit the economy crumbled and wages in the UK are now paid in turnips, which is why you do need to measure by weight
I would not argue against being paid in gold. I would accept even a mere three or four pounds for my annual compensation in the current labor market.
He’s either poor af or fucking massive!
