you believe in God, that this whole thing wasn’t all for nothing
You don’t have to believe in god to believe that this whole thing wasn’t all for nothing. I don’t believe in god and I got through the death of my mother in 2009, father in 2014, and best friend of ~25 years in 2019 (a period during which I was a pretty committed atheist.) It’s enough to know that their lives had meaning to me and to others, and that they would want me to carry on with my life rather than wallowing in sorrow and grief.
Sure, I get that it helps people and I don’t begrudge them that. Just seems like a weirdly specific thing to add to a list of things to deal with grief. ‘Believe in something’ I would get, ‘Believe in this specific thing’ struck me as a little odd.
And thanks, it was a rough 10 years, but I’m doing much better now.
Atheist married to a Catholic here: It’s not odd for religious people to share their religious perspective. It’s inextricably part of the fabric of their life and their worldview, and for them it’s relevant to the question OP asked.
No, it’s not odd for people to share their religious perspective. I do, however, find it a little odd for people to offer it as specific advice for how to cope with grief to randos on the internet whose beliefs you have no idea about. Hence my suggestion of the more general ‘believe in something.’
Okay but you don’t find it odd but you described it as “weird”-ly specific. My advice is relax and remember that just because someone mentions Jesus in front of you doesn’t mean you’re being assaulted. It goes both ways too — just because you mention atheism in a room full of religious people is no cause for you to feel sheepish. This is the equilibrium you should strive for.
You don’t have to believe in god to believe that this whole thing wasn’t all for nothing. I don’t believe in god and I got through the death of my mother in 2009, father in 2014, and best friend of ~25 years in 2019 (a period during which I was a pretty committed atheist.) It’s enough to know that their lives had meaning to me and to others, and that they would want me to carry on with my life rather than wallowing in sorrow and grief.
That’s fantastic, and perhaps you don’t need to but it can certainly help. And I’m sorry for your repeated losses in the span of a decade, truly.
Sure, I get that it helps people and I don’t begrudge them that. Just seems like a weirdly specific thing to add to a list of things to deal with grief. ‘Believe in something’ I would get, ‘Believe in this specific thing’ struck me as a little odd.
And thanks, it was a rough 10 years, but I’m doing much better now.
Atheist married to a Catholic here: It’s not odd for religious people to share their religious perspective. It’s inextricably part of the fabric of their life and their worldview, and for them it’s relevant to the question OP asked.
No, it’s not odd for people to share their religious perspective. I do, however, find it a little odd for people to offer it as specific advice for how to cope with grief to randos on the internet whose beliefs you have no idea about. Hence my suggestion of the more general ‘believe in something.’
Okay but you don’t find it odd but you described it as “weird”-ly specific. My advice is relax and remember that just because someone mentions Jesus in front of you doesn’t mean you’re being assaulted. It goes both ways too — just because you mention atheism in a room full of religious people is no cause for you to feel sheepish. This is the equilibrium you should strive for.