I had a couple of new followers in bluesky. A new follower DMed me. He asked how I was, I said I was good. Then he asked where I was from and when I said I prefer not to say, he said he understands and that he wanted to know more about me. I told him my interests and such and didn’t give any important information about myself. He too told me about his hobbies. Then he asked about my location once again. When I declined once again he said that he understands “not being cool enough to say where you are from”. That was an odd thing to say. I got creeped out and blocked him. Is this normal? Why would anyone want to know about each other’s location?
Yeah it’s normal, it’s one of the first things I ask or get asked when I meet new people online.
It’s cool to meet new people from all around the world, so knowing where someone’s from is really interesting and gives people stuff to talk about too!
Plus, it’s very helpful, because once you know where someone’s from you know their timezone, what sort of weather they deal with, you might have some insight into their culture etc to better ensure you don’t offend them, or maybe you’ve visited or love something about their country so again you now have new things to talk about :-D
Anyway yeah, similarly with wanting to know someone’s age, location is often one of the first questions we as strangers ask each other in online conversation.
Age is also super useful to know, are we talking to a 12 year old? A 20 year old? A 60 year old? Knowing their age will better inform us of how to have a positive and respectful conversation, it’ll inform us of what part of their life there in and thus we can take guesses to their generational cultural norms and interests, if they’re likely to have a career, or be married, or if they’re likely still in education studying for their masters, etc etc.
You don’t need to know an EXACT age, just as you don’t need to know an EXACT location, but “I’m in my 20s from England” is a more than appropriate response :-)
Bottom line: Always trust your gut if someone seems weird online (especially if they’re pushy for info you’re unwilling to share), but don’t assume they’re weird just because they want to know some basic details like A/S/L 👍
I’m in my late 30s from Australia, now you don’t need to ask. G’day
I remember 9/11, but not the fall of the Berlin Wall. And I was about as far away from both as you can get.
Since the early days of Facebook, most people have been in roughly two camps: those who share just about anything, and those who share barely anything. Ok, there are also privacy minded people who share nothing at all, but that’s a different story.
People in the first category just love to tell you where they live, how many pets they have, send photos of everything etc. You know, social people. They also expect you the be like them, because that’s how tribalism works. It’s the default setting in the human brain, and disabling or even just limiting that urge takes some some skill and effort.
People in the second category share only a few opinions, but never their location or photos. I think most people on Lemmy are like this.
Why would anyone want to know about each other’s location?
What an odd thing to ask. Where are you from?
Lol
Lol
A/S/L?
What does that mean?
Age/Sex/Location
Oh sweet summer child
Son? Is that you?
Are ya winning son?
awww
Yeah - back in the day A/S/L was asked so you had a rough idea of the type of person you were talking (typing) with…
37/M/India v 15/F/US would give you a very rough idea of the demographic the other person belonged to - and might shape your conversation differently.
and as internet lore of old says: that 15/F/US was either a 30 y/o living in their mum’s basement or an FBI agent
Which was weird, because I remember being 14 in the late 90s, and EVERYONE was 14-16/F/Cali.
And I’d always say “Oh, sorry. I’m 14, but I’m from Ohio”.
I wonder how many FBI agents I pissed off.
Having lived in the days of IRC and BBS you did not tell people your ASL and knew anyone that asked was probably a pervert.
That make me feel old lol and bring back some mIRC memory
14/F/Cali 😂
Your comments are tagged as being from a bot, was that intentional for this joke lol
The two main bots in my IRC bot network were named Man14 and Girl41
Hmm, can real users be tagged as bots? Surely they’d complain and have it fixed quite quickly?
I saw this bot reply and just instinctively downvoted and blocked it, can’t stand Reddit/Lemmy bots that don’t serve a useful purpose (like unit conversion or haiku’s) haha.
Anyone can label themself as a bot in the Lemmy user settings, sometimes users do so mistakenly
Aaaaand that’s apparently what I did. My excuse is I’m old and an idiot.
No problem, I’ve seen it happen a few times so I thought I’d ask 😄
No, but that’s hilarious! I wonder if it’s because of the stereotypical answer to the A/S/L question?
That’s cause of your account settings. Uncheck robot/bot option.
American/Sign/Language.
a/s/l
This sounds like a weird person at best or the prelude to a scam, stalking, or social engineering at worst. You stick with your standards and don’t doxx yourself to passive aggressive douchebags, however insistent they may be.
Most of my random DMs are some sort of business marketing pitch or slow burn confidence scammer. I wouldn’t volunteer any real information about yourself until you get to know them better. And even then, especially the crypto scammers, are willing to do the slow burn because they’re going for a larger jackpot of your life savings.
I tell everyone “I have a policy for never doing business with anyone I never met face to face.”
Personally I only ask after interacting for months, and I only offer mine the same way. By that I mean in positive interactions.
I agree with others that say it might be an awkward way to get to know you
In general though I just don’t like to be DM’d unsolicited without me
stalkingfollowing the account and get to know the vibeThis is why I just don’t do microblogs. I’m just an uninteresting and uninterested specimen of humanity
So idk why someone would want to randomly know about me through DM
I got creeped out and blocked him. Is this normal?
Yes, it is normal that you blocked him.
Like Country or you street address?
Sure, it’s also normal to tell them to go fuck themselves though
Blocking out of the blue seems over the top to me. I’d rather just confront him about his behavior and see how he reacts. Maybe he just phrased it weird and didn’t mean to come off as creepy.
If not, well, then you know
If you are polite to a potential scammer on the phone or on the internet, you are giving them a chance to persuade you into being scammed. Block at will.
Not blocking does not mean giving away personal information or being scammed. Yes, if people find this a hard thing to do, by all means, block them. But if you’re not incompetent and just set your boundaries, there may not be reason for an outright block, that’s what I’m saying. Again, it may very well be a slight misunderstanding
Meh. The internet is a large place. Block indiscriminately. There’s no reason to have an uncomfortable interaction. OP doesn’t owe a random stranger anything let alone an explanation.
Well maybe but if op enjoyed the conversation somewhat, blocking ‘indiscriminately’ would certainly be out of place
Yes.
I sometimes like to know the general area someone’s from (country or state), so I understand the context of their experience or point of view. It’s not anything I would push if the person felt uncomfortable sharing. That sounds like a red flag.
Yeah, there are good reasons to want to know where someone’s from, but pushing the issue for no reason with a near stranger is kind of weird.
Depends on what part of the world you come from, where do you live? If you provide your home address I can also read you your horoscope.
