The closest word I can think of is a sycophant but that’s too strong word and not exactly what I’m looking for. The word I’m thinking of has negative connotations and it’s for someone who is friends with different groups but only at a superficial level and isn’t necessarily honest about who all they’re friends with. This person would be seen as untrustworthy.
no, it’s normal to have a variety of friends
i’m talking about people with loyalty to a specific ideology and they are not honest about who they are in contact with, i live in asia in an area where you can get in a lot of trouble if you support democracy and if you share such information with the wrong person you can get in a lot of trouble
Ooooh ok, in that context I can see what the issue is. That is such a heads-up for me in terms of making assumptions based on my own privilege, and I apologise for doing that here. I’m very lucky to be able to discuss politics without fear. I wish you all the best.
it’s ok, everyone has their own problems
my wording was maybe not clear
Sounds like they are just doing their best to survive in an oppressive situation. If you can get in serious trouble for your beliefs it is normal not to be open about things that relate to that subject.
Reminds me of a line from ‘Catch-22.’ I may have the wrong character name.
Orr would defend his Communist friends to his Fascist freinds and he would defend his Fascist friends to his Communist friends. No one ever defended Orr because he was too weird.
yes this is basically what I mean
In the book, the character was sincere. He really did try to see both sides and get along with people. It never seemed to work.
To answer the original question; a good term would be ‘two-faced.’ Someone who pretends to be a friend and then gossips about you with others.
‘Wishy-washy’ is a person who simply goes along with the majority without having strong opinions of their own.
I agree. I think ‘two-faced’ is the best i’ve seen based on OP’s various comments in the thread.