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This is not a mere shitpost - these be FACTS baby! :-P
What a madlad!
Congratulations, you are now being put on a watchlist!
Ha ha ha ha. I am already on a watch list so beat you to it. (I really am)
Why does this sign COMPEL me to touch it so strongly. With every part of my body.
Um that is weird, other people have to touch the sign too.
I see no problem as long as the fire department didn’t order them to touch it.
The fire department is furious! XD