Did your son ever play a sport or an instrument? When he went up to the plate at bat, or stand up to play a solo, did he make a mistake? Did you rush out onto the field or stage or whatever to fix that mistake? Did you disown him or berate him or make him feel stupid?
You’ve already told him that you don’t approve of him dating an older guy, and presumably you’ve spent the last 21 years teaching him how to be an adult and make good decisions. If you want to protect your son, be there for him. Get to know his boyfriend, and make sure they both know you’re watching out for your kid.
Dating an older guy might be a mistake. Your son might get hurt, or feel used, or feel unworthy of love. All of those can happen whether you avoid his boyfriend or not, but all of them will be easier to survive if he knows he has a dad in his corner.
Did your son ever play a sport or an instrument? When he went up to the plate at bat, or stand up to play a solo, did he make a mistake? Did you rush out onto the field or stage or whatever to fix that mistake? Did you disown him or berate him or make him feel stupid?
You’ve already told him that you don’t approve of him dating an older guy, and presumably you’ve spent the last 21 years teaching him how to be an adult and make good decisions. If you want to protect your son, be there for him. Get to know his boyfriend, and make sure they both know you’re watching out for your kid.
Dating an older guy might be a mistake. Your son might get hurt, or feel used, or feel unworthy of love. All of those can happen whether you avoid his boyfriend or not, but all of them will be easier to survive if he knows he has a dad in his corner.