Every group chat seems to die the moment I send 1-2 texts there. Every single one. Old, new, offline friends, online friends, everywhere. What’s going on? Are my jokes bad? Have you ever experienced this? If yes, what was the issue you found out?
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Gotta get there earlier … before all those other thoughts get a chance to drown out your perfectly sensible thoughts.
Do you fart in lifts with the same effect ? If not, it’s probably in your head :)
I lurk mostly, like 100-200 to 1 there aren’t enough people to get long engaging threads if thays what yoite after, , thank <insert deity of choice> for that
I’m not a joking person and I feel similar situations. Maybe I’m the extreme opposite, my (almost) complete lack of lightheartedness leads me to face echo chambers, both IRL and in the cyberspace. I do some memes and I say/post some funny things but my essence is imbued with non-conformist thoughts.
I’ve noticed something similar to this, where I walk into a room and it goes silent enough that it’s like the stereotype of a cowboy walking into a saloon. There’s only one place where I can trust this to never happen.
If this was reddit this thread would have no replies.
Do you experience people becoming silent and staring at you with disgust when you make a joke in real life?
Nope I am not that open irl
You might be over thinking your jokes. Try not editing your reaction thoughts. The first thing you think is often wrong or absurd but it can also be very funny because its wrong or absurd.
For example, Louis CK has a joke about seeing a person walking with their dog, and also talking on the phone. The person is holding the leash and the phone in the same hand, so the thought that popped into Louie’s head was, “I wonder what the benefits are of hooking your phone up to your dogs leash?”.
Jokes need to be some version of something you really shouldnt say, for them to be funny. Reasons you shouldnt say something could be: its shocking, its silly or wrong on purpose, its taboo societally, its offensive, it punches down, its too personal, etc etc.
I know my jokes are fire because I get validation here.
It’s the chat rooms that suck. 😬
Look at it like this: You know how actors are told to break a leg and comedians are told to knock 'em dead? You just floored them with your text and they’re dead from laughing.
Been there done that.
A few years back I went back to an old Internet haunt that I hadn’t been to in more years still.
People were there, chatting, including at least one person I knew who’d been there previously. I should have taken the hint when he joked that he “didn’t spend a lot of time there, honest” (paraphrase), but I basically picked up where I’d left off years before rather than feel out the new vibe. There were about twenty or so people there at first, and I only really noticed when there were ten or so left and they weren’t saying much.
I left. Haven’t had the nerve to go back. If I do, I’ll try to feel out the vibe first.
In the meantime, I’ve found other places to hang out and different people. But I still try to reel myself in occasionally, just in case.
Why are you in so many group chats though? Just cliquish behaviors.
I suppose a group chat by it’s very definition is a clique, else it would be a public chat.
The key - as in face to face interactions - is to only bother yourself with groups you have a personal interest in, or a professional benefit from being in.
It’s a fine balance. Too many groups and it comes across as insincere, too few and you end up out of the loop on a lot of friendly news or professional opportunities.
They can smell it on you like a dog.
Holy shit, the sociology of group chats is complex as fuck judging from these comments. I hate them too much to ever have stopped and wondered why I hate them.
My suggestion would echo Bukowski: Don’t try. It’s perfectly fine to only respond in the group chat when something needs to be coordinated. Everything else one on one communication is better for. And if you do feel like interacting, don’t force it. Silence is never wrong. On the contrary.
I don’t even do group chats for party invitations. I just text everyone individually. It’s a little more work but it’s so much nicer, as far as I’m concerned.
Then again, I was born in the 90s. I’m a grumpy old man and without a doubt out of thouch.
+1 just for mentioning Bukowsky … he is WAY underrepresented on the Internet (which explains why it’s in this state)
I was born in the 90s. I’m a grumpy old man
I feel my bones turning to dust reading this.
Since when is 35-24 old lmao
When it comes to digital communication, I think I might be a dinosaur. I have never used Discord or TikTok. My group chat experience as a teenager was on IRC.
Culturally I am also out of touch - I come from a time when young people were reliably progressive, and where there did not seem to be a huge political gender divide. I feel weirdly removed from those born ten years after me, who are now around 20.
Sure, I’m in a few group chats on WhatsApp and Facebook Messenger, and I know these situations in the abstract. But if OP is a teenager they probably come from a completely different world than I do.
I’m just not with it any more, you know. I wear an onion in my belt.
That said, I of course agree completely that I am the embodiment of youth in most aspects of life!
I’m so with you on this. Only much moreso. WITF would I EVER want to use stupid little computer where you have to type with your THUMBS? And costs TWICE as much as a great desktop?
“Portability” they say. Hell I went out-of-house to AVOID phonecalls, to live in the material world, not to walk down the street looking in the direction of my toes, missing everything going on around me, talking to invisible people. Pathetic.
its you.
I used to have this problem and I’m not sure exactly how to fix it but I can say that it helps a lot if you consider what potential responses you might get before you speak. Don’t just say things because you want to say them, say things because they open up the conversation for interesting responses. This is not the same as “asking a lot of questions” because that’s exhausting, as anyone who’s dealt with a Sealion knows. Instead, try to say things that are open-ended. If your chat’s tone is comedic, try not fixing your typos so that someone else can chain a joke off of them. If the chat’s tone is serious, try making an analogy that connects the current topic to a previous one. If the chat’s tone is toxic, you can leave.
There is an enormous range of age and intelligence in a place like this. It only takes a couple of dumb kids to create negativity. The entire demographic at some point in time may not align with you.
Like I’m abstracted in functional thought. Many people cannot follow abstractions or contextualize them well. People that lack self awareness about the spectrum of human functional thought and assume they are some kind of universal standard and authority are the primary negative that causes you to question yourself in ways like this post. There is no standard. There are several types of functional thought, and of those, a few will struggle to effectively understand yours. That is okay. The world is not a binary. Right and wrong are idealized oversimplifications. There are exceptions to every rule. You likely encounter people that do not understand you as well as you would like, but that is going to happen with a group that contains a large spectrum of people.
Like some people care about personality. I care about curiosity, and want to engage with interesting stuff with depth on the edge of what I understand. I also want to question everything and look at subjects from different angles. Lots of people make stupid assumptions about unconventional angles of questioning a subject.
