CEOs instead of students!
Truly. That’s why they like yachts. Deep in their hearts, they yearn for the Sea. They know they are meant to become one with it!
so does this mean y’all guys are finally coming around on utilitarianism?
That’s completely inappropriate. That boulder could be turned into a statue.
IDK. I’m thinking more a giant bronze statue of Luigi would be more appropriate. Interesting enough, those things aren’t as expensive as you might think. Some googling suggests a cost of between $25k-250k for a life sized bronze statue. That’s a lot for an individual, but well within the realm of crowd funding. I say we place it on a main road outside UHC’s headquarters in Minnesota. Make the bastards drive past it every single day on the way to work.
Hey… Boulders ain’t cheap either.
…and a cool ass boulder.
Yes, I suppose the boulder has some value as well.
It probably has some nice bouldering problems to try!
Ha, that was a V12+ joke!
The boulder will still be cool under the sea. And also, under the sea that ceo finally has some real value. As food.
This! You have any idea how much people pay for boulders to landscape their yards? A small one about the size of a nightstand can cost 300+.
Can we just put them all in submarines and promise it will be different this time?
We are just replenishing the world’s supply of low radiation steel. In a thousand years scientists will be so thankful.
A drop of guillotine is completely free. Just saying.
Sure. But it just doesn’t have the same fire and brimstone “wrath of an angry God” feel to it. Guillotines are quick. But if you really hate someone, you’ll go to the trouble of hauling an 800 lb boulder around just to off 'em. If you really want to show your displeasure with someone, you’ll go to the trouble of loading a giant rock on a boat and hauling it an hour offshore. It’s “I hate you so much I’m willing to go to this amount of effort!”
What about a really dull guillotine?
One that takes ten or fifteen drops to do any real damage?
I mean, yeah, but it just doesn’t have the same vibe to it. You can’t make a grandiose speech about “condemning them to the depths.” Plus it’s just much more terrifying, watching the surface of the water rise above you, as you’re pulled inexhorably down into the abyss…
Also, the water muffles the screaming!
Don’t wanna ruin the fun, but I’d argue a 100lb (to continue the weird measures) boulder would more than suffice.
It’s not about efficiency; it’s about sending a message! Bullets are a lot easier than boulders into the Sea, but they just don’t have the same vibe! Nothing says you hate someone quite as much as being willing to haul a half ton boulder a hundred miles offshore in a boat. The impracticality isn’t a bug; it’s a feature! For boulders chucked into the ocean, the bigger, the better!
Yeah sure,but…it’s 400lbs. I mean, if I did that with every person I hate…oh boy. Strongman in 2 years. World domination in 5. Am I truly ready for this responsibility? Is anyone?
Bring justice to the wicked AND get swole? Sounds like positives all around. You’ll basically be Hercules at that point!
But that’ll bring a new level of responsibility. I couldn’t just be Hercules without trying to rid the world of evil. And I already have plans for the weekend 🤨
I mean, even Hercules is allowed to take a break. In fact, self-care is a vital part of the work of any true hero! You can’t be effectively battling evil if you’re unhealthy, depressed, or sleep deprived. Take care of yourself, superfam!
I thought that this was gonna be a different joke, I’m not gonna lie.
Now I’m morbidly curious what joke you were thinking…
“It’s an acceptable loss.”
Also the boulder
It’s a very neat boulder.
Pipneers used to ride those babies for miles.
Oh my god, that scene in the beginning of Amistad just flashed back in my head. I had completely blocked it for like 25+ years and now it is back, oh god, I feel sick.
Well, that’s something I’ll actually apologize for. This is meant to be a humorous vent, not PTSD inducing.
No worries, no need to apologize, I enjoyed your post :)
Well, I suppose it’s PTSD-inducing if someone is a health insurance CEO. But if that’s the case…TO THE SEA WITH YOU!!
Everybody wants a rock to wind their CEOs around.
can we stop with the political shit? its clogging the feed on lemmy and its making the site boring as fuck.
I mean, this is on lemmy.ml…
this is a blanket statement. Its like everyone who posts on here is constantly triggered and has to rage post. I don’t know how you can live your life every day like that. The point was good the first time it was posted, but every day the same thing over and over like propaganda, sounds kinda familiar.
It’s almost like the material conditions of the society haven’t changed, and that people are desperate for a symbol to rally around. You’re watching the birth of a folk hero. You’re a witness to history.
how is he a folk hero? do you people live in the middle of the woods larping a resistance fighters?
Are you a CEO? If so…the Sea…it calls for you!
no? I just know that fallout is a video game and not real life.
You would have been saying the same if we were alive and talking about Guy Fawkes after he tried to blow up Parliament.
He stood the test of time, so why wouldn’t Luigi.
Well, you want to know a cold, hard, undeniable fact, grounded in the very fabric of reality?
Brian Robert Thompson will never kill again.
40,000 victims. But not one more.
The rock is a folk hero, that is why people are reticent to throw their heros into the sea with trash tied to them.
Even in death they’d be causing sea levels to rise.
But they’re providing valuable nutrients to endangered sea critters, so it balances out from an environmental perspective.
Polluting the sea is not cool either
Also rocks can be valuable too
Could we not go for a more sustainable solution? I’m sure they’d make a pretty decent fertiliser.
The CEOs will be fully recycled by sea life. Steel is just iron and carbon, no real damage to the environment as they rust away. And boulders are inert. And we can make sure the CEOs are dressed in suits made of all natural fibers when we chuck 'em in the drink!
