• Corgana@startrek.website
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      10 months ago

      This is absolutely an incel meme unless you actually look like the guy in the bottom pic (in which case you probably have a few more important things that need addressing before seeking out a partner). And if you truly believe that you look like the guy, then see point number one.

        • Corgana@startrek.website
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          10 months ago

          Well, then you’re not an incel. The “in” in incel means “involuntary”. Meaning that blaming onesself is, to a degree, acknowledging one’s own complicity in one’s circumstances, ie: voluntary. The defining trait of Inceldom is avoiding/denying responsibility for one’s own (lack of) happiness. The message of OPs meme, by implying that the guy on the bottom is unloveable (with or without confidence) is doing just that.

    • frezik@midwest.social
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      10 months ago

      I wish there was a better way to distinguish between small-i incel (a life condition you’d like to change) and big-I Incel (a toxic social movement).

      • Corgana@startrek.website
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        10 months ago

        (a life condition you’d like to change)

        Incel ideology is defined by the “involuntary” (the “In” in “Incel”). So by definition, saying that something can be changed, implies it is not involuntary. And not a part of the ideology.

        • root_beer@midwest.social
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          10 months ago

          Except it’s not exactly involuntary for them, is it? People who subscribe to that ideology are undateable because they become awful, toxic people, which can be changed.

    • LadyAutumn@lemmy.blahaj.zone
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      10 months ago

      Well, this meme is specifically promoting the notion that how attractive you look directly correlates to your ability to date people. When how you look is not the be all end all of dating.

      This general concept of one’s “biologically ordained appearance” being incompatible with finding love and relationships is closely tied with incel ideology. The “black pill” is generally used to denote that you’re biologically and immutably so unattractive that you will never be able to “compete in the sexual marketplace.” Felt gross just typing that. It’s also attached to the conspiracy theory of “hypergamy,” that you’re so unattractive that even women of “comparable conventional attractiveness” won’t ever date you.

      The message of the meme, that someone is so unattractive they can not date anyone at all, is not explicitly incel ideology, but that notion is closely tied to it. In all likelihood this meme was made by someone in the incel community or who regularly consumes incel content.

      • Something Burger 🍔@jlai.lu
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        10 months ago

        Well, this meme is specifically promoting the notion that how attractive you look directly correlates to your ability to date people. When how you look is not the be all end all of dating.

        How is that incel ideology? Incels hate women and think they are entitled to sexual relationships. This has nothing to do with believing dating potential directly correlates to physical attractiveness (which it does, at least for men).

      • Katana314@lemmy.world
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        10 months ago

        this meme is specifically promoting the notion that how attractive you look directly correlates to your ability to date people

        There are behavioral studies showing this to be completely true. As someone who is honest about how I probably wouldn’t date an unattractive person, I freely admit this tracks; and, unlike incels, I absolutely don’t blame either gender for this fact. It’s just how our brains are wired.

        • TimewornTraveler@lemm.ee
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          10 months ago

          ohh is there also a study defining exactly how ugly YOU are? or maybe you have some mental health issues and this is just more self deprecating talk?

          that’s the issue here, mother fuckers keep saying “study study study fact fact fact ugly ugly ugly” but that speaks nothing to their own situation. you can abuse facts and research, and I see it literally every day: depressed people cherry pick negative evidence to support their worldview that they are worthless