Before epilepsy was understood to be a neurological condition, people believed it was caused by the moon, or by phlegm in the brain. They condemned seizures as evidence of witchcraft or demonic possession, and killed or castrated sufferers to prevent them from passing tainted blood to a new generation.
Yeah it is an eternal mystery. And assholes will exploit compassion even though some people deserve compassion because of their circumstances (which may lead to crime). Conservatives tend to think only suckers have compassion for those that don’t “pick themselves up by the bootstraps”.
Even in a marriage there is tension because one does not know if their partner is exploiting good will. Relationships are hard and not a science, despite what the latest self-help book preaches.