It was just a few months ago that we had some fun with Logitech over it’s amazing, never been done before AI mouse… that was actually just a rehash of a previous mouse that had a button…
It’s just unoriginal thinking. What does every business want? Lots of cash that comes in automatically on a known schedule. How can we do that? Have our customers subscribe. What will they subscribe for? Hmm lifetime speakers? Lifetime cable replacement?
Side note business idea: subscription usb power bricks. We send you a variety of cables that work for everything. If one breaks we send you another. $30/yr
You start at $30 which is plenty for the product. Hell the single yearly supply shouldn’t cost that much. Then overtime you slowly increase and changed rates for new subscribers.
Eventually you’ll have to implement location locks - can’t ship cables to more than one addresss. Plus you really don’t want people sharing or giving out cables to friends - so maybe the cables need to be smart and somehow phone home?
That would be nice cause then we could capture some user data and maybe target some advertising
But wait, most people are going to plug these bricks into their phones or tablets, yeah? Those have data connections we could surely piggy back off so rather than a one time or irregular phone home we could have real time data on where the cables are and how they’re being used. And we can release an app they run on their device to capture that information that shows a nice pretty dashboard of when they charge their devices, how much power they use, etc.
We then use that as the justification to move the entire product range to a monthly subscription instead of a yearly one. We can even remove the sharing restrictions to begin with, and then add them back later with a family tier, and eventually prevent cables from being away from the registered home base for a predetermined length of time.
We could then add an upgrade tier for those that do need to use their cables in other locations.
…Is this the kind of logic that goes through their heads?
OMG we need to stop. It’s gotten too real now. The only saving graces are that this is a day old post on Lemmy and so venture capitalists are unlikely to still see it.
But damned if I don’t think Anker could make something out of this.
HAY GUYS LOOK AT HOW CUSTOMERS LOVE HP AFTER THEIR SWITCH TO SUBSCRIPTION PRINTERS. WE SHOULD DO THAT TOO!
–Overheard from the Logitech C-Suite, probably
It’s just unoriginal thinking. What does every business want? Lots of cash that comes in automatically on a known schedule. How can we do that? Have our customers subscribe. What will they subscribe for? Hmm lifetime speakers? Lifetime cable replacement?
Side note business idea: subscription usb power bricks. We send you a variety of cables that work for everything. If one breaks we send you another. $30/yr
Never worry about broken cables again!
My post was supposed to be a dystopian warning, NOT AN INSTRUCTION MANUAL, YOU MONSTER!
Surprisingly I could see that being a worthwhile thing for a lot of people I know
See the problem here is the price. At $30/yr that’s worth considering. The problem is they’d charge $30/mth.
You start at $30 which is plenty for the product. Hell the single yearly supply shouldn’t cost that much. Then overtime you slowly increase and changed rates for new subscribers.
Eventually you’ll have to implement location locks - can’t ship cables to more than one addresss. Plus you really don’t want people sharing or giving out cables to friends - so maybe the cables need to be smart and somehow phone home?
That would be nice cause then we could capture some user data and maybe target some advertising
But wait, most people are going to plug these bricks into their phones or tablets, yeah? Those have data connections we could surely piggy back off so rather than a one time or irregular phone home we could have real time data on where the cables are and how they’re being used. And we can release an app they run on their device to capture that information that shows a nice pretty dashboard of when they charge their devices, how much power they use, etc.
We then use that as the justification to move the entire product range to a monthly subscription instead of a yearly one. We can even remove the sharing restrictions to begin with, and then add them back later with a family tier, and eventually prevent cables from being away from the registered home base for a predetermined length of time.
We could then add an upgrade tier for those that do need to use their cables in other locations.
…Is this the kind of logic that goes through their heads?
OMG we need to stop. It’s gotten too real now. The only saving graces are that this is a day old post on Lemmy and so venture capitalists are unlikely to still see it.
But damned if I don’t think Anker could make something out of this.
What have I done?
wails uncontrollably
It’s probably more “Hey look at what HP got away with. Let’s try it”.