Im a trans woman, and im bisexual. My attraction to women goes from “I wanna be you” to “I wanna be with you”

Sometimes I end up looking at the downblouse, mostly since im taller than most cis women. Recently I was with a friend, everything ok, however. I was able to see her nipples because of the blouse she was wearing and her loose bra. I was normal about it, but I was feeling bad and uncomfortable because this is my friend and I felt like I was kinda invadir her provacy somehow.

What I wanna ask is if yall notice when someone is watching the downblouse and how you feel about it.

  • MajorHavoc@programming.dev
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    3 months ago

    If it’s an acquaintance, I try to ignore it and let it go. It’s awkward, but I’m probably not the only person who finds them attractive. I focus on what I think it takes to be a comfortable positive interaction for them, even if my natural reactions probably do show through.

    If it’s a close friend, I would feel free to - in private - mention to them the effect of their (current) wardrobe, and just ask if they mind my enjoying the view.

    “X is showing, when Y. It doesn’t bother me, I love the way you look. But I thought I would check if you’re aware and comfortable with it. I’m probably the tallest person here, I can just stand a bit further away, today, if you need me to.”

    My saying something in private gives a chance to adjust, if what is showing is not what they were hoping for.

    If exactly what they intended is showing, they can call me a prude; I can say sorry I thought better to check; and we can laugh it off.

    And, of course, I try to respect whatever preference they share, regarding how they want to be looked at.