It’s gotta be the super mario man himself hailing from Georgia, Iosif Stalin.

  1. Wins against the nazis, doesn’t elaborate, leaves, USSR becomes the sugar daddy of the eastern bloc

  2. Has a really cool looking moustache. No wonder he gets parodied as Mario

  3. Literally outwitted his enemies by playing the “innocent secretary” and gaining power.

  4. Was highly respected and feared by his enemies

  5. Is still parodied and memes have spread of him by both tankies and non tankies alike

  6. Is in Red Alert 1

  7. Massive troll in pranking the other party members, he would throw bits of fruit into their drinks.

  8. Isn’t Hitler.

  • AbouBenAdhem@lemmy.worldEnglish
    0·
    1 month ago

    If we’re going for “cool story” rather than “admirable person”, then the Byzantine emperor Justinian II.

      • AbouBenAdhem@lemmy.worldEnglish
        0·
        1 month ago

        He was overthrown, had his nose cut off, and was exiled to the Crimea. After conspiring to return to power, he was summoned back to Constantinople for additional punishment; but instead he escaped to the steppes and married the daughter of the Khazar kaghan. The Byzantines negotiated with the Khazars to have Justinian extradited, but Justinian was warned by his wife and killed the Khazar officials sent to capture him. Next he escaped to the Bulgars, married his daughter to the Bulgar Khan, and convinced the Khan to lend him an army to re-take the throne. So he appeared before the walls of Constantinople at the head of a barbarian army, but the city refused to surrender. Finally he used his knowledge of the city’s geography to crawl in through the sewers and took the throne by surprise.

        • frank@sopuli.xyz
          0·
          1 month ago

          Holy crap, that is wild. I’m going into a rabbit hole about him, this is great!