You honestly sound very depressed and like you really don’t know what you ARE. Try things, open mindedly, and you may find that some of these things are you, or can be fun regardless. Stop getting in your own way.
If you want to change this about yourself, then you can see a therapist to help you do it. You don’t have to be mentally ill to see a therapist, they can just help you make changes in yourself that you want to make. For something like this you would want to see a CBT therapist
It would probably make in existence less useless and maybe would had gave me a girlfriend in my lifetime, I dunno though. I know that isn’t me.
You honestly sound very depressed and like you really don’t know what you ARE. Try things, open mindedly, and you may find that some of these things are you, or can be fun regardless. Stop getting in your own way.
If you want to change this about yourself, then you can see a therapist to help you do it. You don’t have to be mentally ill to see a therapist, they can just help you make changes in yourself that you want to make. For something like this you would want to see a CBT therapist