That HR lady is totally breedable.
I’m usually quite a big fan of not having any prjunddices against people just because they are part of a certain group, gender etc. But please just shut the fuck up. Why do some people (often enough men) simply have to think with their dick and be disgusting human beings?
This planet works on chaos and sex.
It’s being gross about it and referring to her like livestock that bothers me. Breedable. Yuck.
“oh I’m sorry, I had to leave early. Something’s come up. You’ll receive FMLA paperwork soon; I’m afraid I have to invoke mandatory legally protected family medical leave. See you in at least 90 days”
Oh. I heard this bluff from Pat Geisinger himself, in person.
I was employed by VMware many moons ago when Pat took the helm. He decided to start by cutting an entire department from my location, sight unseen.
We then changed all the furniture because they had two floors of the building and wanted to cut back since they just lost half a floor of people.
We go home, work from home for a while, then return. Then Pat comes by for a site visit.
He stood there with the gall to say that the team that was cut was a different business unit, and that was a business decision regarding that business unit (it was the front line team, which was then relocated to “low cost centers”)… Blah blah blah… This is a different department, a different business unit, blah blah, what happened to them is isolated, and doesn’t mean anything regarding your employment… Blah blah …
I didn’t buy it for a second. But I was too stressed out to do anything at the time.
The layoffs started less than six months later. I was part of the first round.
Fuck you Pat.
So sad how they just have to fucking lie to everyone.
Well, if they tell you about your impending demise you might not work as hard!
why would you
This sent a bad chill along my spine. PTSD.
I look at this smile and think “There is no HR in Ba Sing Se”
I got an invite for a meeting the next morning. I was like “they wouldn’t be that stupid, right?”. Well, they were. I had time to prepare something funny but I was disarmed by their stupidity.
Accurate
Omg!
Sorry, too busy. Why can’t my manager fill you in on my current projects?
Haha I tried that one, because I was legitimately too swamped and management got very upset.
And then?
Oh I still got laid off, just later in the day.
I think it messed with their plans to lock me out of everything after the meeting. Must be logistically challenging lining up all those layoff meetings. 🙄
That smile. That damned smile.
I think this is their mask.
Do they get special training on how to lie with a straight face?
I know a couple hr people personally, and they speak in a kind of coded manner at work. Some of them will legitimately try to help you out, but of course the nature of their profession means they can never be a true ally. Not for long, anyway.
I’ve been friends with HR people at a number of jobs. They generally party hard. I’ve also always had the understanding that if they have to walk me we’d be professional about it. I’ve never been let go.
Yeah this matches my experience. HR person is always the one to have a bottle of whisky squirreled away for a good time.
I’ve been let go twice. It’s shitty, but I realise they have very little power in a situation like that.
This is why I have so far refused to be a people manager. I’m not going to be able to emotionally handle laying someone off.
Same, I couldn’t take it. It’s hard to be in that position without feeling like a traitor.
Actually both times I got laid off my managers took the day off to hide while HR did their wetwork, only reaching out later to gush about how bad they felt.
Kind of cowardly tbh, but I get it—that’s why we aren’t managers.
It’s a prerequisite to get the job in the first place.
Brb, backing up my script folder and deleting anything I haven’t already shared with the team
I don’t get it, why does she need these projects for?
To onboard your replacement after you get fired at 4pm.
The two or three juniors they’ll eventually have to hire to do the job
Or throw AI at it, because that will work super well
Which turns out to be a ton more costly than just paying the employees raise.
I’m guessing this is about perceived performance issues, potential or realized. But I’m not sure at all. I’ve never dealt with something like this. Only a few places I’ve worked have even had a proper HR department.
To do the needful.
When you get fired they need to re-assign your work to others so they want to know what you’re working on.
^
In my previous company, at about 9PM, about half the company got an invite for a 9AM meeting, and the other half for a 10AM meeting, we saw all the name in our invite of course. Let’s say the evening was hard, to guess which group was staying and which group was fired! I was in the “stay” group, this repeated every quarter and after 3 or 4 quarters it was my turn to be in the fire group, the next quarter they closed the company and fired the remaining employees.
The HR lady was like the picture.
She looked like Anne Hathaway?😯
It has to be a Friday too.
It is always tempting to try to justify one’s position and get out of being laid-off/fired.
The decision has been made by those that “know your position”, or your manager is being let go next.
