The pee-secreting gland that moves the pee into the kidney to be washed and warmed up before being passed into the bladder - a little dime-sized gland call the “Penguinal Class Action Monitor” - can sometimes become overactive and try to secrete too much urea at once, faster than the kidney can accept it. This causes something of a backlog, the medical term being “St. Bartholomew’s Lump Reversal”. It causes the gland to swell up with pee, something it’s not really equipped for given that it’s a gland and not a hollow chamber like the bladder, all while the kidney simply refuses to take even the normal a mount of pee because it’s guarding against possible infection upstream. The term for this is the “Immune Raster Verifier Cadence”, and this is likely the cause of the back pain you mentioned.

I am, in fact, a doctor. I have a degree in Major Arterial Anaphylaxis from the University of Chechetchistserster in England. The professor who taught me said I was the best student he’d ever had. Keep in mind, though, that he also once taught a little-known scientist by the name of Isaac Newton. Sooooooo… 🤷‍

Treatment: drink lots of alcohol and eat lots of cheese while watching copious amounts of pornography. It’s important you don’t move around too much by, say, going to work or doing chores, because the alcohol needs to be able to settle around your glands to cure them.

Either that or kidney stones.

Leonardo DiCaprio. I get huge, cringy ‘imposter syndrome’ vibes from him, like he knows he shouldn’t be doing this for a living but soldiers on regardless. I’ve never bought into a single one of his performances. He always seems like he’s ‘acting’, and never really embodies the characters or reacts ‘in the moment’. It’s all a poor imitation of what he has seen other actors do.

I hate that he became Scorsese’s new De Niro, and so when I hear of a new Scorsese film I get excited and then immediately lose interest knowing that DiCaprio is probably gonna be leading it. Literally every film he has done would have been better with a different actor.

Also Nicolas Cage. I get the memey antifan sort of thing that bolsters his career, but let’s be honest, there’s no hint of talent in the man. He has ruined what might have been great films. Bringing Out the Dead could have been a legit classic if not for his involvement.

To me it looks more like the transcript of a monkey asking for help because he’s choking.

A Bug’s Life

When talking about the date with another human, DD/MM (+YYYY if required); when doing anything related to the sorting of files by date, YYYY/MM/DD.

Good for you man, that’s a really great watch 😊

Sad little men like that are most hurt by you not being offended by them. It’s like with internet trolls; non-engagement is the best weapon. It also happens to require the least amount of energy or time. So easy, but so devastating to their ego.

RIP Discord.

What exactly happens to salt that makes it “expired”? Some sort of mould from the air growing on it or something?

Kids. Thank god I’m not attracted to kids. Or animals. Anything else is fair game. Feet attached to a consenting adult are fine. Don’t see the big deal. I like to spit-shine the rusty sheriff’s badge, so why the fuck would I care if someone likes a boring regular appendage like a foot? 🤷‍

Unless there’s some angle to this non-foot people don’t understand? Like, maybe being turned on by feet is comorbid with an uncontrollable need to blast rope over any uncovered foot you see? Now that would suck.

1. Always turn up to social gatherings with pocketfuls of Babybel cheeses
2. If #1 doesn’t clinch it, it was never meant to be

I agree with the outrage, but I don’t know that using race science to combat race science is the way to attack this horseshit. Futurism essentially says “the NYT says Asians have small hands, but what the race science actually says is that hand size is yada yada etc. etc.”

Like, is race science silly or is it not? 🤷‍ If science said that, yes, Asian women have unusually small and “nimble” fingers, it wouldn’t make a bit of difference; the entire concept is stupid and racist, not just the inaccuracy of the hand measurements. Needling over the microdifferences in index finger girth between Asians and Americans (who may well be of Asian descent themselves) is missing the whole-ass point.

There’s a reboot in the works, with [almost] all of the OG cast. Can’t wait.

As a kid, I thought he was singing “Beelzebub has a devil for a sideboard” and I have never been able to correct it in my brain. I know what he’s actually singing, but the misapprehension is indelible. I don’t even know what I thought it meant, like he’s a demonic sideboard? A sentient set of shelves that Beelzebub stores his malevolent vases on? 🤷‍

We have hot shites to show you.

Boots should really come with an exhaust so that with every step you’re pushing air/moisture out the back end. Nothing like a big pipe or anything, just a wee hole and a sort of bladder that fills with air when you lift your foot and pushes it out again when you step on it. Sure, you’ll sound like you’re stepping on farting mices everywhere you go, but if you just cough with each step you should be fine.

I see Big Gym is at it again.

Most of my teeth are destroyed, decades of neglect due to mental illness. I’ve been hearing about lab-grown teeth for the last 25 years and always hope it happens soon, but the progress sees to be genuine this time. I just hope it doesn’t cost insane amounts of money to get teefs grown.

Dr. Reddy’s hard, bulbous, throbbing capsule will take away your anxiety.

Ahh, so it’s like they’re reading from the order/prescription, and say “ok he needs pregabalin - tick - and it’s 300mgs - tick - and it’s hard capsules - tick”, or something to that effect?

This is an angle I’ve never considered before, with regards to a future dystopia with a corrupt AI running the show. AI might never advance beyond what it is in 2025, but because people believe it’s a supergodbrain, we start putting way too much faith in its flawed output, and it’s our own credulity that dismantles civilisation rather than a runaway LLM with designs of its own. Misinformation unwittingly codified and sanctified by ourselves via ChatGeppetto.

The call is coming from inside the house mechanical Turk!