What if I don’t want to observe my turd on an elevated toilet bowl pedestal every time I take a shit?
You’d be shit out of luck
You seat on it reverse.
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You have to do the ‘ol’ push ‘n flush and hope you got the timing down.
Turns out your shit sitting exposed on a dry shelf smells exponentially worse than when it drops into water. Anyone still using these toilets in the 21st century is a psychopath.
Usa drops kids off at pool, the dutch stack shelves.
8 into a backflip midair wipe for me.
#11 is called an upper decker.
Flanders here. Those shelved ones are not common but also not omg this is strange. But in kindergarden they are ( where i saw) mostly the norm. Handy to check stuff. ( Is it solid, no worms,… )
In hungary too in some older toilets. Tbh its better because of less splash.
If you regularly need to take stool samples like me it’s easier as well. On the downside it’s smellier.
It smells like hell on a hot summer day.
Why smellier?
In the more typical style of toilet, the poop is quickly submerged in water, reducing the smell. With the shelf toilet, it remains in the air for all to smell.
I know the meme is that people use it to look at their poop, but honestly the main advantage is the 0% chance of water splashing up. I will take this design over the “standard” ones any day.
But what about just poop on some toilet paper, make no splash, and the smell is still not so hard, as with the dutch/German toilet
You haven’t thought of the smell!
What kind of rock hard dookes are you laying?
Probably standard European fibre rich turds.
Have found that putting a little bit of TP in the water before commencing the act helps a lot to avoid Poseidon’s kiss.
I once stopped in urgent need of a toilet at the dirtiest little gas station in the middle of nowhere, where the one guy on duty directed me out back to a foul, stunningly filthy toilet. After doing my business I arose and, turning to face the toilet, flushed. It was an old flush mechanism where the water just kind of fell in from all sides, causing a kind of trapped tsunami to eject a single drop of fresh poop water 7 feet up in the air and down straight into my mouth.
If my many decades of life have taught me anything, it’s to close my mouth when flushing or scrubbing the toilet.
thanks I hate it
It’s so you can examine your stool, you might have some blood or a consistency you don’t like, that way you see it
Wake up, coffee, breakfast, shit, see how much of last nights meal was really digested, shower, shave, work
Typical morning, idk what the big fuss is
I’ve never not been able to detect something like that with a water-under toilet
It also helps you gauge the poop’s internal temperature using the back of your scrote, if you are endowed with fairly loose balls.
Long balls!
Apparently this design was popular in Germany a hundred years or so ago. Its key advantage was allowing the user to examine their stools for signs of digestive health problems.
I dont need to examine my stools to know my digestive heath is horrific.
I thought it would just be for less splashing
It’s definitely for less splashing. I hate the North American bowls that spray your ass when your turd dunks.
You just need to adopt the American diet so that you either spray the toilet or your turd is so large that it enters the water before falling and doesn’t splash.
We Germans like to take pride in our workmanship.
*workmanshit
*arbeitungmannscheiß
A fellow Sprecher, I see! Happy cake day!
its so annoying having to use tongs :/
You don’t have a knife?
Not “a” knife. “The” knife.
I know the joke and all, but recently the local theme park has replaced their toilet brushes with toilet rubber shovels. They work surprisingly well. They can both hack’n’slash a log, but also the back side is also ripped so you can use it to brush out the regular shit from the sides, while avoiding the dreaded paper clutter and other issues with a toilet brush being used by thousands of people daily.
It’s like toilet brushes evolving into poop knives. Looks like this: https://pin.it/OKHBRlxjI
This guy cleans commodes.
Culture shock #2. A public American toilet may require “thousands” of toilet brushings daily.
Tell me you were exaggerating… Right?
Yeah well, I’m not counting. On busy days, the toilets have queue lines all day long. Depending on the length of the visit and the willingness to use the brush, it’s probably in the hundreds, or at least a lot more than anywhere else.
Hmm maybe brushed by staff once every 1-3 hours if visibly dirty?
Yep, but nowadays they are losing popularity. I don’t even know if you can still find them.
Explains shit fetish or vice versa?
This post helps me understand Zizek on ideology and toilets.
The poop shelf makes it easier to use the poop knife.
how do I unread this?
This is how you go Dutch.
How do you inspect your stool for blood, then?
By hand as god intended
Eyes
Taste
I’m confused, isn’t this a better spot for the drain hole? When you sit facing the wall? So you have a shelf for your comic books and chocolate milk?
Ah, touché
Serious answer: The design had easy stool sample collection in mind.
I’ve blasted this all over Reddit back in the day and now I’ll blast it here: HOW OFTEN ARE THE DUTCH COLLECTING THEIR STOOLS THAT THEY NEED THIS KIND OF TOILET IN EVERY HOUSEHOLD? THEY USE IT EVERY DAY AND NOT JUST AT A DOCTOR’S OFFICE OR A HOSPITAL WHERE YOU WOULD THINK THAT STOOL SAMPLES WOULD BE COLLECTED OFTEN.
To this day no one has ever given me a reasonable believable explanation that makes sense. I’d be happy to hear that “all the greedy corporate toilet makers didn’t want to change their design to save money and now we’re all stuck with this dumb toilet blah blah blah” or “we Dutch folk have a special device to sit on that you don’t see in this picture that makes the design of this toilet sensible” or even “we simply love looking at a big stinky pile of s*** every time we take a dump you wouldn’t understand we’re Dutch”
I stayed in hotels and motels in the Netherlands and they all had the stupid toilet and it stanks so bad and they don’t believe in ventilated bathroom so you just have to open a window and smell it and your wife and kids have to smell it too. it’s so dumb. I ended up flushing every single turd one by one just to survive.
It looks like it’s designed to soak your balls if you flush mid-poop. I’m not into this.
I understand the Dutch may have different tastes, though.
Edit: if you go about things butters style, you’ll get an unhealthy butthole douching.
We had these here as well and i have no idea. The only thing i ever heard that made sense was it was easier to take stool samples. That makes some sense, but why would every household need them?
Gotta make sure that toilet plume(Google it) is aimed up between the legs!
